FFF!

SlothGoals · March 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-107?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:27cb19bb-535f-44e8-9b12-afbb6578f4cePost:ead3148d-abea-49e0-88f2-caf568656208">Re:FFF!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re:FFF!: I'm working and unable to respond to your immediate requests, Stage. I've pointed it out to kristbot as it was a group of regulars together talking elsewhere about it.
Posted by mlg78[/QUOTE]

<div>I just saw now where you pointed it out. And to be fair, it was just one person who agreed about the wedding band not a group of regs. </div>

Sierra524 · March 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-107?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:27cb19bb-535f-44e8-9b12-afbb6578f4cePost:d4eaf35c-70c8-4674-8308-0829e03adad3">Re: FFF!</a>:
[QUOTE]I'm 99.99% sure IAmTheFatherOfTheBride is my dad. Same details, same location, his name is in his profile. I seriously feel sick.
Posted by cookie0803[/QUOTE]

Oh no :[ Im so sorry. I really hope its not. If it is, I hope you guys can work it out.

SlothGoals · March 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-107?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:27cb19bb-535f-44e8-9b12-afbb6578f4cePost:d4cdd370-c541-4bc5-b7e5-b7e8caca4117">Re:FFF!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re:FFF! : If I missed the post that said this, I do apologize for that. I read through the thread twice and didn't see it.
Posted by StageManager14[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>No, it wasn't on TK it was over on FB.

</div>

SlothGoals · March 2013

Can someone CN the FatherOfTheBride post? I tried reading through it yesterday but got lost amidst all the deleting

StephJean83 · March 2013

I have to agree with Stage that the cost of the rings means nothing in comparison to the value of their marriage. Some people value having nice looking things in their home on display vs having flashy rings. Just because the registered for super expensive items, doesn't mean they have the cash to buy them. I love my Keurig and totally would have registered for it however I don't have the 300 my parents spent on it to have bought it myself.

Peledreamsofrain · March 2013

I think I know what mlg is trying to say, but I could be wrong.

I think she's pointing out that the woman is clearly materialistic because of the gifts she made her family get her, and because she's selling them rather than returning them. Theoretically this materialism should extend to everything she was proud of and cared about because thats how narcissism works. Being that the rings are a symbol of the marriage itself, her lack of effort to acquire a stupidly large ring kind of seems like a manifestation of her lack of interest in the relationship.

However, if this is not the angle mlg is coming from, and instead she is judging the worth of the marriage based on the value of the ring, add me to the list of the offended.

My ring is a tiny band with 5 tiny stones that are nowhere near the value of what you can buy today from your average jewelry store. My husband's great Aunt was not a rich woman, and they bought what they could afford back in 1926. My band cost 200 to re-size because she had tiny hands, and the band was thin from wear. But it means a lot that it's been on the hand of a woman in a successful marriage, and that his family wanted me to wear it too.

The idea that anyone would look down their nose on such a sentimental item that carries so much love and so many family memories is infuriating. I don't believe mlg is that kind of person from the posts that I've seen in the past.

GoodLuckBear14 · March 2013

I flame the chick on JEP who wants to propose to her BF of ten years because marriage scares the crap out of him and he won't do it. I also flame Retread on that House Party thread for suggesting that "house parties" were a Yankee infiltration into the south via the Bush family.

and Cookie {{{hugs}}}

daveANDkristen · March 2013

Ditto earlier flames including iamthefatherofthebride for not only being a douche, but for being pissed that he didn't get any "actual advice" even though he didn't ask an "actual question". He made me stabby.

I don't think anyone's gotten to Alli Llo yet, so I flame her for this thread about guidlines for picking your WP (click). And also for ending every one of her posts with a fuuckin emoticon... 1997 called.

beardownbchs · March 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-107?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:27cb19bb-535f-44e8-9b12-afbb6578f4cePost:316aea45-66eb-4d8a-91e4-21db0cdfc558">Re:FFF!</a>:
[QUOTE]I think I know what mlg is trying to say, but I could be wrong. I think she's pointing out that the woman is clearly materialistic because of the gifts she made her family get her, and because she's selling them rather than returning them. Theoretically this materialism should extend to everything she was proud of and cared about because thats how narcissism works. Being that the rings are a symbol of the marriage itself, her lack of effort to acquire a stupidly large ring kind of seems like a manifestation of her lack of interest in the relationship.
Posted by Peledreamsofrain[/QUOTE]

This. Much better than I put it.

And Stage, I was not intentionally insulting you and I apolgize that I came across that way. I was jumping to conclusions on the girl with the china, not what people spend on wedding bands vs. other things across the board.
I have lots of things that will cost more than my wedding bands but what I was trying to say is what Pele so eloquently put above.

AddieCake · March 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-107?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:27cb19bb-535f-44e8-9b12-afbb6578f4cePost:7e7cc56c-b4f5-4e9b-9249-748e18af14e2">Re:FFF!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re:FFF! : I just saw now where you pointed it out. And to be fair, it was just one person who agreed about the wedding band not a group of regs.
Posted by kristbot[/QUOTE]

<div>She didn't say the whole group agreed with her, just that a group was discussing it, which is true. </div>

AddieCake · March 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-107?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:27cb19bb-535f-44e8-9b12-afbb6578f4cePost:11448e7d-23ce-4892-a5c5-d2f2457fba47">Re: FFF!</a>:
[QUOTE]<strong>I flame the chick on JEP who wants to propose to her BF of ten years because marriage scares the crap out of him and he won't do it.</strong> I also flame Retread on that House Party thread for suggesting that "house parties" were a Yankee infiltration into the south via the Bush family. and Cookie {{{hugs}}}
Posted by GoodLuckBear14[/QUOTE]

<div>I intended to flame her as well, but then she came back and saw the error of her ways. I also have a tiny flame for Retread b/c I think she jumps the gun on thinking people are vendors. It seems to happen a lot, and she was doing it on AA yesterday. Those in question might be vendors, but I didn't get the sense they were just b/c they reference a website. </div>

cookie0803 · March 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-107?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:27cb19bb-535f-44e8-9b12-afbb6578f4cePost:6edb83dd-1082-4c1a-ad23-c456959c6851">Re:FFF!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re:FFF!: I'm so sorry. If he is, can we hear your side?
Posted by misshart00[/QUOTE]

<div>Absolutely. Basically, FI and I started out the planning process expecting to pay for everything ourselves, because, you know, it's our responsibility. It was going to be very small, but really we just want to get married. We would be happy with anything. FI's parents, with whom we are very close, pretty much insisted that they were paying. FI is their youngest and last to get married, and they really want to celebrate with all of our friends and family. That being said, if we had wanted something small and more private, they would have done that, too. Honestly, we're just really appreciative of what they're doing, and if we don't have a preference, why not make them happy? </div><div>
</div><div>My father also offered to pay, but FI and I have never counted on that money from him. He values money more than anything else in his life, and since I was little he has used everything he has ever purchased for me as leverage, whether I wanted the item or not. He owns his own business, and money was never a problem for him. I know it's wrong to judge the way someone else spends their hard-earned money, but it's hard not to when you see your father buy a new Mercedes for himself nearly every year while you and your mother walk around in shoes and clothes covered in holes. He is a terribly mean, angry person and we literally dreaded his arrival every night. He would walk in the door and look for something to scream about.</div><div>
</div><div>The day they split up (only bringing it up because it was part of his post), I was getting ready for class, 3rd week into the semester, and I hear my parents screaming downstairs. I heard him say to my mother, "I do not want two people with no purpose in my house, you should both be gone by the time I'm home." and he walked out the door. My mother and I packed our stuff and left. She had to sleep on a friends couch for a while, so she literally did not have room for me. </div><div>
</div><div>I was going to be living in my car, but FI (BF at the time) had me come stay with him until I found my own place. I was in MD and he was in PA, so I had to drop out of school. My dad pulled all money for my education. We did not speak for a few months and I was not able to get anymore of my things, then one Friday he calls me and says that he can't live in that house anymore and he is moving to CA. I had to get my stuff from the house that weekend or he would throw it all away. I said I would be there the next morning, which he apparently decided is exactly 9 AM. You all read about the time debate, so I won't go into that again. </div><div>
</div><div>I ended up going to get the stuff that we could, got in a screaming fight with him, and he threatened to hit me. I left, and he told me that I would need to return my car and he would keep it for a month to teach me about responsibility. I told him I had to work and would not have any way of getting back home, since FI had exams that week. If he wanted the car so badly before the weekend, he would need to bring someone up with him and drive it to his house. He threatened to have the car impounded and me arrested for stealing, and shut my cell phone off (I paid for it, but it was on his account). Also, he told me to change my last name. He has since gotten engaged and calmed down a bit, which is why we speak now. I can deal with him because he lives so far away and I rarely have to see him, but I can tell everyone right now that when FI and I have kids, he will never be alone with them.</div><div>
</div><div>So there is the insanely long story of how my dbag dad came to The Knot. The End.</div><div>
</div><div>If anyone needs more clarification, I'm happy to oblige. I'm so mad at him right now, I'm shaking.</div>

daveANDkristen · March 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-107?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:27cb19bb-535f-44e8-9b12-afbb6578f4cePost:11448e7d-23ce-4892-a5c5-d2f2457fba47">Re: FFF!</a>:
[QUOTE]I flame the chick on JEP who wants to propose to her BF of ten years because marriage scares the crap out of him and he won't do it. <strong> I also flame Retread on that House Party thread for suggesting that "house parties" were a Yankee infiltration into the south via the Bush family</strong>. and Cookie {{{hugs}}}
Posted by GoodLuckBear14[/QUOTE]

Maybe I misunderstood what Retread was saying there. I didn't think she was trying to say "house parties" were a Yankee thing, I thought she was saying that this so-called southern tradition was popularized by someone whose family isn't even southern. Meaning it's not regional, it's just rude all over. In other words, calling bullshiit on using "southern tradition" as an excuse.

misshart00 · March 2013

In Response to Re:FFF!:[QUOTE]In Response to Re: FFF!:I flame the chick onnbsp; JEP who wants to propose to her BF of ten years because marriage scares the crap out of him and he won't do it.nbsp; I also flame Retread on that House Party thread for suggesting that "house parties" were a Yankee infiltration into the south via the Bush family. and Cookie hugsPosted by GoodLuckBear14I intended to flame her as well, but then she came back and saw the error of her ways. I also have a tiny flame for Retread b/c I think she jumps the gun on thinking people are vendors.nbsp; Posted by AddieL73[/QUOTE]

I'll agree with this one. She seems to think if someone posts a link to something they like, they must be a vendor.

AddieCake · March 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-107?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:27cb19bb-535f-44e8-9b12-afbb6578f4cePost:7e6b3d97-ef09-4738-b5ee-b7e8f5e41725">Re: FFF!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: FFF! : I just think it's funny that she thinks that some etiquette lessons about whom to invite or what gifts to give your WP would have saved that train wreck.
Posted by TXKristan[/QUOTE]

<div>Thank you! When she posted that, I felt like I was missing something b/c that isht was going to go down regardless of any etiquette advice she had ignored unless it was "Should I have 2 BSC bridesmaids?" </div>

daveANDkristen · March 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-107?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:27cb19bb-535f-44e8-9b12-afbb6578f4cePost:9e05f24b-d072-4f47-bf4a-3e021726b040">Re: FFF!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: FFF! : I intended to flame her as well, but then she came back and saw the error of her ways.<strong> I also have a tiny flame for Retread b/c I think she jumps the gun on thinking people are vendors.
</strong>Posted by AddieL73[/QUOTE]

This I completely agree with. I really appreciate that she is an active mod, but she's a little trigger happy.

mcda04 · March 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-107?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:27cb19bb-535f-44e8-9b12-afbb6578f4cePost:a22b8c3b-a2e7-4bd4-a895-cceae53a190f">Re:FFF!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re:FFF! : I don't want to argue with you because we're obviously going to disagree and that's fine, but I have to think that the girl registering for thousands of dollars in china is far more of a "materialistic snot" than I am. If someone is going to ask their guests to spend that kind of money on dishes, I would think they have a pretty huge budget and money means something to them. Sure I'm being super judgey and leaping to conclusions, but the HUGE dollar difference makes the wedding bands look like an afterthought. This is something that signifies your marriage and you're supposed to wear it for the rest of your life. I would assume that someone who obviously care so much about glassware and the name brand would also care about her wedding band. Also, I, too, only saw that $187.00 and didn't know until now that it was $400. That changes my opnion a little and I'm sure my wedding band will be less than that. There's nothing wrong with a wedding band that cost $15, but people like me are going to assume things when your china costs like $10,000.
Posted by beardownbchs[/QUOTE]

I'm going to agree with Stage on this one.

We don't know that the bride actually registered for this stuff. It could be a case like the one Antibride posted about last week where she got a Versace set because the guest thought they were being nice but the B & G hated it.

As far as the rings; I think it's a little harsh to judge her marriage based on the value of the rings. THAT to me is materialistic. I am a very simple girl so my rings are around the $800 price range. It's just personal preference. Does this mean people shouldn't give me a gift of $1000+. Also, the China was a gift; which means she could do with it whatever she wants.I mean it's unethical to re-sell. *I* personally would return but she probably doesn't know it's wrong.

AddieCake · March 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-107?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:27cb19bb-535f-44e8-9b12-afbb6578f4cePost:094d601b-8bad-4ee6-89df-7d46bd478af7">Re: FFF!</a>:
[QUOTE]Can someone CN the FatherOfTheBride post? I tried reading through it yesterday but got lost amidst all the deleting
Posted by kristbot[/QUOTE]

<div>I don't see how. I tried to CN it for my husband last night, and it was just too many kinds of crazy. </div>

cookie0803 · March 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-107?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:27cb19bb-535f-44e8-9b12-afbb6578f4cePost:f8af380a-fbf9-405f-ad84-09f068249828">Re: FFF!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: FFF! : Thank you! When she posted that, I felt like I was missing something b/c that isht was going to go down regardless of any etiquette advice she had ignored unless it was "Should I have 2 BSC bridesmaids?"
Posted by AddieL73[/QUOTE]

<div>I was picturing her previous posts as something along the lines of, "should I kick my BMs out for not wanting to spend every. second. of. their. lives. between now and my wedding together as a group?"</div><div>
</div><div>I'm also trying to picture the one BM sneaking her extra pair of heels into the ceremony site.</div>

GoodLuckBear14 · March 2013

Cookie - thank God you found your FI and his family. If you are not already doing so, please see a therapist. Even if you have it together, from what you just said, I think there is a lot that you need to get a firm grip on with a professional. Emotional abuse and blackmail leave scars that last much longer than anyone thinks.

daveANDkristen · March 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-107?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:27cb19bb-535f-44e8-9b12-afbb6578f4cePost:3ad6e8ad-bc6d-4941-bf01-96d9d19cedea">Re: FFF!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: FFF! : Okay, rereading that, I think you may be right daveANDkristen, so I will rescind my agreement with that flame. Retread tends to make over exaggerated and inaccurate statements and claim them as fact based on her personal experiences alone, so I think I was predisposed to read that wrong.
Posted by StageManager14[/QUOTE]

No worries! I agree with your assessment of Retread though.

And cookie, I am so, so sorry. Best of luck in your relationship with your father, should you choose to continue having one.

GoodLuckBear14 · March 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-107?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:27cb19bb-535f-44e8-9b12-afbb6578f4cePost:3ad6e8ad-bc6d-4941-bf01-96d9d19cedea">Re: FFF!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: FFF! : Okay, rereading that, I think you may be right daveANDkristen, so I will rescind my agreement with that flame. Retread tends to make over exaggerated and inaccurate statements and claim them as fact based on her personal experiences alone, so I think I was predisposed to read that wrong.
Posted by StageManager14[/QUOTE]

Same here.

Peledreamsofrain · March 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-107?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:27cb19bb-535f-44e8-9b12-afbb6578f4cePost:8695b2f9-543a-48a3-b2eb-804391fc433d">Re:FFF!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re:FFF! : Absolutely. Basically, FI and I started out the planning process expecting to pay for everything ourselves, because, you know, it's our responsibility. It was going to be very small, but really we just want to get married. We would be happy with anything. FI's parents, with whom we are very close, pretty much insisted that they were paying. FI is their youngest and last to get married, and they really want to celebrate with all of our friends and family. That being said, if we had wanted something small and more private, they would have done that, too. Honestly, we're just really appreciative of what they're doing, and if we don't have a preference, why not make them happy? My father also offered to pay, but FI and I have never counted on that money from him. He values money more than anything else in his life, and since I was little he has used everything he has ever purchased for me as leverage, whether I wanted the item or not. He owns his own business, and money was never a problem for him. I know it's wrong to judge the way someone else spends their hard-earned money, but it's hard not to when you see your father buy a new Mercedes for himself nearly every year while you and your mother walk around in shoes and clothes covered in holes. He is a terribly mean, angry person and we literally dreaded his arrival every night. He would walk in the door and look for something to scream about. The day they split up (only bringing it up because it was part of his post), I was getting ready for class, 3rd week into the semester, and I hear my parents screaming downstairs. I heard him say to my mother, "I do not want two people with no purpose in my house, you should both be gone by the time I'm home." and he walked out the door. My mother and I packed our stuff and left. She had to sleep on a friends couch for a while, so she literally did not have room for me. I was going to be living in my car, but FI (BF at the time) had me come stay with him until I found my own place. I was in MD and he was in PA, so I had to drop out of school. My dad pulled all money for my education. We did not speak for a few months and I was not able to get anymore of my things, then one Friday he calls me and says that he can't live in that house anymore and he is moving to CA. I had to get my stuff from the house that weekend or he would throw it all away. I said I would be there the next morning, which he apparently decided is exactly 9 AM. You all read about the time debate, so I won't go into that again. I ended up going to get the stuff that we could, got in a screaming fight with him, and he threatened to hit me. I left, and he told me that I would need to return my car and he would keep it for a month to teach me about responsibility. I told him I had to work and would not have any way of getting back home, since FI had exams that week. If he wanted the car so badly before the weekend, he would need to bring someone up with him and drive it to his house. He threatened to have the car impounded and me arrested for stealing, and shut my cell phone off (I paid for it, but it was on his account). Also, he told me to change my last name. He has since gotten engaged and calmed down a bit, which is why we speak now. I can deal with him because he lives so far away and I rarely have to see him, but I can tell everyone right now that when FI and I have kids, he will never be alone with them. So there is the insanely long story of how my dbag dad came to The Knot. The End. If anyone needs more clarification, I'm happy to oblige. I'm so mad at him right now, I'm shaking.
Posted by cookie0803[/QUOTE]

Cookie, I am so very very sorry that you've had to endure such a hateful person in your life. I would suggest (if you aren't already) that you see a therapist and discuss with them over wether or not he is so toxic that he should have a place in your life at all.

Good luck and *hugs*. You have a whole legion of people who don't even know you, but can see plain as day that he is in the wrong, and that you don't deserve his bs.

AddieCake · March 2013

I agree Retread was just saying it the way DaveANDKristen explained it, and as a Yankee (born and raised in IL), I didn't take offense to her comment the way someone else in the thread did. I also agree with Stage that all the people who come here acting like something is a "southern tradition" that isn't are not helping! They need to learn to say, "In my circle/crowd...." as opposed to "It's a regional thing."

And oh, Cookie. Big hugs to you!

mcda04 · March 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-107?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:27cb19bb-535f-44e8-9b12-afbb6578f4cePost:8695b2f9-543a-48a3-b2eb-804391fc433d">Re:FFF!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re:FFF! : Absolutely. Basically, FI and I started out the planning process expecting to pay for everything ourselves, because, you know, it's our responsibility. It was going to be very small, but really we just want to get married. We would be happy with anything. FI's parents, with whom we are very close, pretty much insisted that they were paying. FI is their youngest and last to get married, and they really want to celebrate with all of our friends and family. That being said, if we had wanted something small and more private, they would have done that, too. Honestly, we're just really appreciative of what they're doing, and if we don't have a preference, why not make them happy? My father also offered to pay, but FI and I have never counted on that money from him. He values money more than anything else in his life, and since I was little he has used everything he has ever purchased for me as leverage, whether I wanted the item or not. He owns his own business, and money was never a problem for him. I know it's wrong to judge the way someone else spends their hard-earned money, but it's hard not to when you see your father buy a new Mercedes for himself nearly every year while you and your mother walk around in shoes and clothes covered in holes. He is a terribly mean, angry person and we literally dreaded his arrival every night. He would walk in the door and look for something to scream about. The day they split up (only bringing it up because it was part of his post), I was getting ready for class, 3rd week into the semester, and I hear my parents screaming downstairs. I heard him say to my mother, "I do not want two people with no purpose in my house, you should both be gone by the time I'm home." and he walked out the door. My mother and I packed our stuff and left. She had to sleep on a friends couch for a while, so she literally did not have room for me. I was going to be living in my car, but FI (BF at the time) had me come stay with him until I found my own place. I was in MD and he was in PA, so I had to drop out of school. My dad pulled all money for my education. We did not speak for a few months and I was not able to get anymore of my things, then one Friday he calls me and says that he can't live in that house anymore and he is moving to CA. I had to get my stuff from the house that weekend or he would throw it all away. I said I would be there the next morning, which he apparently decided is exactly 9 AM. You all read about the time debate, so I won't go into that again. I ended up going to get the stuff that we could, got in a screaming fight with him, and he threatened to hit me. I left, and he told me that I would need to return my car and he would keep it for a month to teach me about responsibility. I told him I had to work and would not have any way of getting back home, since FI had exams that week. If he wanted the car so badly before the weekend, he would need to bring someone up with him and drive it to his house. He threatened to have the car impounded and me arrested for stealing, and shut my cell phone off (I paid for it, but it was on his account). Also, he told me to change my last name. He has since gotten engaged and calmed down a bit, which is why we speak now. I can deal with him because he lives so far away and I rarely have to see him, but I can tell everyone right now that when FI and I have kids, he will never be alone with them. So there is the insanely long story of how my dbag dad came to The Knot. The End. If anyone needs more clarification, I'm happy to oblige. I'm so mad at him right now, I'm shaking.
Posted by cookie0803[/QUOTE]

Cookie, I'm so sorry you're dad is such a jerk.

Cyberhugs. I hope he really reads all his responses and realizes he's wrong. I think it kinda hit him because he posted that "how to delete" post on budget weddings yesterday. I hope the comments hurt him. Some of us were pretty harsh but I don't regret it.

Is he engaged to "Momma" that's another lady that was just crazy pants. They'd make the perfect couple.

cookie0803 · March 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-107?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:27cb19bb-535f-44e8-9b12-afbb6578f4cePost:df44d55f-aaaf-4250-a2bd-03663f2b7a7b">Re:FFF!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re:FFF! : Cookie, I am so very very sorry that you've had to endure such a hateful person in your life. I would suggest (if you aren't already) that you see a therapist and discuss with them over wether or not he is so toxic that he should have a place in your life at all. Good luck and *hugs*. <strong>You have a whole legion of people who don't even know you, but can see plain as day that he is in the wrong, and that you don't deserve his bs.</strong>
Posted by Peledreamsofrain[/QUOTE]

<div>You have no clue how much that means. I have lived for 23 years feeling like the biggest thorn in the world's side because of the way he has treated me. I know plenty of people had worse. I lived in a nice area where I didn't have to be afraid every day and I knew I would be able to eat every day. I shouldn't complain, but sometimes it's just hard not to. Especially when you just broke your foot yesterday, and ALL you want to do is sit down in front of TK and watch FFF unfold...only to find out your father decided to publicly put you on blast the night before.</div><div>
</div><div>I really appreciate the support, ladies! We don't know each other, but you all have helped me a ton. It was admittedly pretty nice to see people standing up against him, especially when he can't just scream over everyone until he "wins," like a 6-year-old. Sorry for the novel of epic proportions that I left in the middle of the thread.</div>

footballwife77 · March 2013

I'm new to this board (was looking for someone)- My most valued ring in my jewelry box is a plastic heart ring my son got for me for a "present" when he was 5 years old that he bought with his earned money out of one of those quarter machines (tear).

* I know, I think I did the FFF wrong?* because I don't know what it means, I get one of the F's is for flame.

s-aries8990 · March 2013

Cookie, thoughts and prayers and hugs all around.

I was in therapy for a few months and it helped me a bit. I third the suggestion.

I have a selfish douchecanoe for a father myself and I was shaking and boiling during that post. You need to have a beautiful, drama-free day with those who you love and love you back!

s-aries8990 · March 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-107?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:27cb19bb-535f-44e8-9b12-afbb6578f4cePost:c4b1d1a1-a159-4f95-8faf-ac61795db5a1">Re:FFF!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re:FFF! : You have no clue how much that means. I have lived for 23 years feeling like the biggest thorn in the world's side because of the way he has treated me. I know plenty of people had worse. I lived in a nice area where I didn't have to be afraid every day and I knew I would be able to eat every day. I shouldn't complain, but sometimes it's just hard not to. Especially when you just broke your foot yesterday, and ALL you want to do is sit down in front of TK and watch FFF unfold...only to find out your father decided to publicly put you on blast the night before. <strong>I really appreciate the support, ladies! We don't know each other, but you all have helped me a ton. It was admittedly pretty nice to see people standing up against him, especially when he can't just scream over everyone until he "wins," like a 6-year-old. </strong>Sorry for the novel of epic proportions that I left in the middle of the thread.
Posted by cookie0803[/QUOTE]

Isn't that what these boards are for? :)

cookie0803 · March 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_fff-107?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:27cb19bb-535f-44e8-9b12-afbb6578f4cePost:d2b0dbde-013d-410e-ad53-1ade106b50d0">Re:FFF!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re:FFF! : Cookie, I'm so sorry you're dad is such a jerk. Cyberhugs. I hope he really reads all his responses and realizes he's wrong. I think it kinda hit him because he posted that "how to delete" post on budget weddings yesterday. I hope the comments hurt him. Some of us were pretty harsh but I don't regret it. <strong>Is he engaged to "Momma" that's another lady that was just crazy pants. They'd make the perfect couple.</strong>
Posted by mcda04[/QUOTE]

<div>Is that IAmTheMomma, or something like that? I would die if I found out his FI posts here. I can't see her doing that, though. She's actually very nice. I feel bad for her, and her poor daughter that now lives with them. </div>

FFF!

Re: FFF!

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