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Our unforgettable Engagement Party!

Phoenix0Phoenix0 member
First Comment
in Just Engaged and Proposals
It was 3 weeks between the night my sweet heart proposed and our engagement party, which is not long in planning terms!!

The most diffucult part of planning our engagement was finding the perfect dress, but after tens of hours of browsing the net and rushing through fitting rooms I found the one! As soon as my fiancee saw it he came up with the fantastic idea of having a BEACH-THEMED engagement party! ... since the dress makes me look like a mermaid :)

Every detail from the table setting, the souvenirs, the cake and even the centerpieces (which featured real live fish!) was all made to scream UNDER THE SEA :) My fiancee has been an angel in helping me plan, I even travelled for one whole week out of the 3 weeks we had to plan and organise and I flew back to find everything taken care of, despite me being a slight control freak, everything was wonderful!

I have attached some pictures I hope my fellow knotties love! One tiny piece of advice: as soon as you are in your dress and ready to start the evening, forget all the details and the planning and ENJOY YOURSELF and YOUR FIANCEE! you only get one chance and I promise if the center piece is not what you envisaged of the caterer ddnt deliver perfectly, NOTHING is worth ruining your night, ENJOY!!



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Re: Our unforgettable Engagement Party!

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    achiduckachiduck member
    5 Love Its First Comment
    That looks like quite the elaborate party, congrats on your engagement.

    Going forward with planning your wedding there are probably a couple things you should keep in mind if you're going to be posting on TK.

    Throwing your own e-party is rude and AW-ish (attention whore). What's done is done, but make sure you're not planning your own shower or bachlorette parties. Pre-wedding events are thrown in your honour by family and friends.

    I would also avoid having live fish in your centerpieces. It's a pretty controviersial and hot topic on here and you'll likely get flamed for it. No one likes to watch fish poop while they're eating dinner, plus the water isn't filtered and with the lights probably heats and gets dirty quickly resulting in dead fish.

    Best of luck with the rest of your planning.
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    thejucheideathejucheidea member
    First Anniversary First Answer 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    ... oh dear.

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    HobokensFuryHobokensFury member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Answer Name Dropper
    edited September 2012
    I'm glad you had a great time but you committed a lot of etiquette no nos as achiduck pointed out.  Please learn from your mistakes and do not commit them again in the planning process.
     
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    thejucheideathejucheidea member
    First Anniversary First Answer 5 Love Its Name Dropper

    Oh wow.

    This should get interesting. I look forward to the wedding posts from this one.


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    KatWAGKatWAG member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    I would suggest lurking on the etiquette board. I think you have a lot to learn etiquette wise before your wedding.

    I agree that it is very AW-ish to throw your own engagement party especially with an entrance like that.
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    pinkdocmartenspinkdocmartens
    First Comment First Anniversary
    In some cultures big elaborate engagements parties are normal.... I have 3 friends who have had large engagement parties.

    One two occasions it was a cultural
    On the 3rd the couple had opted for a destination wedding and they both had VERY large families. Their family from the United States and Trinidad even flew in for the event.
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    achiduckachiduck member
    5 Love Its First Comment
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_just-engaged-proposals_our-unforgettable-engagement-party?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:683Discussion:a5ad9146-d2f0-43f8-b548-80fdfab5139ePost:79b2b87f-4403-4578-9c07-9f1ecb21d024">Re: Our unforgettable Engagement Party!</a>:
    [QUOTE]In some cultures big elaborate engagements parties are normal.... I have 3 friends who have had large engagement parties. One two occasions it was a cultural On the 3rd the couple had opted for a destination wedding and they both had VERY large families. Their family from the United States and Trinidad even flew in for the event.
    Posted by pinkdocmartens[/QUOTE]

    No one is flaming the size or elaborateness of the party. It's the fact that she threw it herself.
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    pinkdocmartenspinkdocmartens
    First Comment First Anniversary
    edited September 2012
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_just-engaged-proposals_our-unforgettable-engagement-party?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:683Discussion:a5ad9146-d2f0-43f8-b548-80fdfab5139ePost:05585be0-d486-45b3-a664-e98b5eb7b087">Re: Our unforgettable Engagement Party!</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Our unforgettable Engagement Party! : No one is flaming the size or elaborateness of the party. It's the fact that she threw it herself.
    Posted by achiduck[/QUOTE]

    My friends also planned it themselves..............
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    achiduckachiduck member
    5 Love Its First Comment
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_just-engaged-proposals_our-unforgettable-engagement-party?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:683Discussion:a5ad9146-d2f0-43f8-b548-80fdfab5139ePost:15760b59-3a56-4fa5-9e2b-3f930bb6812c">Re: Our unforgettable Engagement Party!</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Our unforgettable Engagement Party! : My friends also planned it themselves..............
    Posted by pinkdocmartens[/QUOTE]

    Just because one person does it doesn't make it correct etiquette. It's still rude to throw your own engagement party, or any party that's considered a gift giving event.
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    thurtathurta member
    First Comment
    edited September 2012

    Looks like it was alot of fun:) My fiancee and I will be throwing our own engagement party too!!

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    LandJ13LandJ13
    First Comment

    You know what's a reaccurring theme here? The same handful of girls who think they are wedding planning gods cutting everything anyone else does to pieces. The same handful on every seperate topic forum. Who are YOU to decide how someone else celebrates? I find those who criticize others to be rude and acting like you know everything there is to know about everything is quote AW-ing unquote. Maybe if you backed off a little bit with your non-stop preaching this site would be more active.


    Just Saying

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    kmmssgkmmssg mod
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_just-engaged-proposals_our-unforgettable-engagement-party?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:683Discussion:a5ad9146-d2f0-43f8-b548-80fdfab5139ePost:2aef450f-11fe-4f91-bd22-ce2c57129173">Re: Our unforgettable Engagement Party!</a>:
    [QUOTE]Looks like it was alot of fun:) My fiancee and I will be throwing our own engagement party too!!
    Posted by thurta[/QUOTE]<div>
    </div><div>Why would you engage in such poor etiquette?</div><div>
    </div><div>I'm feeling really bad for those poor fish!  Must have been like being in a pot of water that was too warm.

    </div>
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    LandJ13LandJ13
    First Comment
    Oh and the OP didn't ask your opinion on etiquette or her centerpieces.
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    GoodLuckBear14GoodLuckBear14 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    Wait a minute.  You threw your own engagement party???  You seriously have some brass ones here.
    Proud to be an old married hag!! image
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    Maggie0829Maggie0829 member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_just-engaged-proposals_our-unforgettable-engagement-party?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:683Discussion:a5ad9146-d2f0-43f8-b548-80fdfab5139ePost:9ec3f755-9a67-4ac6-b92f-53e8732edc5f">Re: Our unforgettable Engagement Party!</a>:
    [QUOTE]Oh and the OP didn't ask your opinion on etiquette or her centerpieces.
    Posted by LandJ13[/QUOTE]

    See the great thing about a public forum is that any poster can make any comment they choose.

    As PP have said throwing a party in your honor is poor etiquette and using live animals of any sort in centerpieces is cruel to the animals and gross for your guests to look at, especially if they died or had a lovely bowel movement. 

    In no way are we saying elaborate engagement parties are a no-no we are just giving OP and others a heads up as to what is and what is not etiquettely correct.  This will prevent any additional side-eyeing that her friends and family may do in the future.

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    KatWAGKatWAG member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_just-engaged-proposals_our-unforgettable-engagement-party?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:683Discussion:a5ad9146-d2f0-43f8-b548-80fdfab5139ePost:9ec3f755-9a67-4ac6-b92f-53e8732edc5f">Re: Our unforgettable Engagement Party!</a>:
    [QUOTE]Oh and the OP didn't ask your opinion on etiquette or her centerpieces.
    Posted by LandJ13[/QUOTE]

    Exactly, IMHO, she posted this to say "look at me, look at me!!!!"

    Since this is a wedding site, we pointed out the wedding etiqutte mistakes she was making. So that she can save herself the embarassment and whispers behing her back on the big day.
    BabyFruit Ticker
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    LandJ13LandJ13
    First Comment
    Wrong ladies, do you really honestly care if her family looks sideways at her? You don't even know her. You are no more important in real life because you act like you are on here. Be nice to others, that's my number rule of etiquette. Maybe I could see more interesting posts then the etiquette police posting on nearly every thread under nearly every topic. Grow up ladies it isn't high school.
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    LandJ13LandJ13
    First Comment
    CMGe, you should be back at your etiquette board if you want to preach sweetheart. And maybe I will check out Wedding Bee, I bet it's a whole lot more active then here with the etiquette police trolling every thread.
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    QueerFemmeQueerFemme member
    First Anniversary First Answer 5 Love Its First Comment
    I don't really care if her family looks sideways at her.  I imagine she does though..  and I'm SURE people did.   In my opinion, it's better to learn that you are about to make a huge etiquette mistake from strangers who will be honest with you, than making the mistake and having your friends and family talk about you for years to come.

    and the fish?  really??  good lawd. 

    image

    Websites/blogs where our wedding has been featured:

    http://www.dapperq.com/2013/11/a-very-dapper-wedding/

    http://www.onabicyclebuiltfortwo.com/2013/10/wedding-christina-g.html

    http://4realequalityweddings.com/2014/05/16/g-christina/

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    LandJ13LandJ13
    First Comment
    Aww look they are all coming out to support each other, touching. Thank goodness I know now not to ever put Adults Only on my invitations, I would have absolutely been mortified!
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    LandJ13LandJ13
    First Comment
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_just-engaged-proposals_our-unforgettable-engagement-party?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:683Discussion:a5ad9146-d2f0-43f8-b548-80fdfab5139ePost:6d55880a-143a-463b-bb9a-34e2d235c836">Re: Our unforgettable Engagement Party!</a>:
    [QUOTE]I don't really care if her family looks sideways at her.  I imagine she does though..  and I'm SURE people did.   In my opinion, it's better to learn that you are about to make a huge etiquette mistake from strangers who will be honest with you, than making the mistake and having your friends and family talk about you for years to come. and the fish?  really??  good lawd. 
    Posted by cmgilpin[/QUOTE]

    This was actually a nice post, it wasn't a direct attack on anyone. But again what good does cutting her up after the fact do? I'm sure it will only make her inactive, she'll never post on here again.
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    audrewuhaudrewuh member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment Name Dropper
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_just-engaged-proposals_our-unforgettable-engagement-party?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:683Discussion:a5ad9146-d2f0-43f8-b548-80fdfab5139ePost:233de80c-6250-4221-87c5-73b8724d404b">Re: Our unforgettable Engagement Party!</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Our unforgettable Engagement Party! : This was actually a nice post, it wasn't a <strong>direct attack</strong> on anyone. But again what good does cutting her up after the fact do? I'm sure it will only make her inactive, she'll never post on here again.
    Posted by LandJ13[/QUOTE]

    <div>Giving someone a heads up that they're being rude in throwing their own party is not attacking anyone. </div><div>
    </div><div>Someone needs to take a step back from the computer and take a deep breath. It's the internetz. </div>
    --------------------------------------------------------------


     
    "You're our early 20's BSC scarecrow. They cower at your maturity." - lennonkdc Anniversary
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    mandi195mandi195
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment
    Ok, wow. Late to this one!
     Etiquette = non-existant for this one. This is right up there with throwing your own bridal shower or baby shower or... need I go on???
    (If you're offended by rudeness, please stop reading now)
    I wonder what the invite read???
    "Hey everyone! Come look at me!! I'm throwing a party, for your convenience, so you can bring me presents!!! While you're here, be sure to check out my half-dead, half-boiled fish! Dont' worry, we'll humanely flush them after the party!"
    egads. *facepalm*
    Praying for a miracle!
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    QueerFemmeQueerFemme member
    First Anniversary First Answer 5 Love Its First Comment
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_just-engaged-proposals_our-unforgettable-engagement-party?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:683Discussion:a5ad9146-d2f0-43f8-b548-80fdfab5139ePost:233de80c-6250-4221-87c5-73b8724d404b">Re: Our unforgettable Engagement Party!</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Our unforgettable Engagement Party! : This was actually a nice post, it wasn't a direct attack on anyone. But again what good does cutting her up after the fact do? I'm sure it will only make her inactive, she'll never post on here again.
    Posted by LandJ13[/QUOTE]

    Pointing out to someone that they did something stupid (like putting live animals out as a prop) isn't attacking them.  It's pointing out that they did something that was either in poor taste, or outright disrespectful or abusive. 

    When someone posts their plans on a public forum, it's usually to get advice or to show off what great ideas they had.  The original poster did this, and now she gets to listen to everyone's opinions on what she did.

    image

    Websites/blogs where our wedding has been featured:

    http://www.dapperq.com/2013/11/a-very-dapper-wedding/

    http://www.onabicyclebuiltfortwo.com/2013/10/wedding-christina-g.html

    http://4realequalityweddings.com/2014/05/16/g-christina/

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    [Deleted User][Deleted User] member
    First Comment
    I'm shocked about many things in this post, but most of all that she spent "tens of hours" looking for a dress at an engagement party.

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    achiduckachiduck member
    5 Love Its First Comment
    edited September 2012
    Oh goodness, I missed a lot while I was taking my cat to the vet.

    LandJ, I (and none of the subsequent posters) attacked the OP. And she probably WAS side-eyed and gossiped about behind her back by her guests due to some of the etiquette faux-pas. If I was her, I would want to know what I had done wrong so I could avoid similar mistakes in my wedding planning. No one wants to throw the party that gets talked about for years for all the wrong reasons. Nor did anyone attack the lavishness of her party. Hell, if I had that kind of money you can bet your a$$ I would have a lavish wedding too. 

    You, who are very new on TK are not the first and will by no means be the last to get their panties in a wad. It's generally better to lurk and get a feel for the boards before opening your mouth and going down in flames. The regs on here will generally stand up for each other when newbs, like yourself turn around and attack us for absolutely no reason. So I second the suggestion that you go play on Wedding Bee, mmkay? Have a great night sweetpea. 
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    Anniversary
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    t12ubeautyt12ubeauty member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    Have any of you that is calling this rude and quoting etiquette thought about how it might be a cultural thing? Different cultures may have certain traditions and customs that are considered an accepted norm that you don't know about. In my culture, the bride and her family traditionally host the engagement party and the bride is very actively involved in the planning process. Had I chosen to have an engagement party, I would've planned it as well. In fact, the groom's family arrives at the bride's house lined up with trays of gifts for the bride and her family. There is a reception afterwards which again the bride is involved in planning. Call that AW all you want, but that's what has been done by our people for centuries. It is not anyone's place to call it rude. 
    image

    We got married 11/3/12!!

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    HobokensFuryHobokensFury member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Answer Name Dropper
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_just-engaged-proposals_our-unforgettable-engagement-party?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:683Discussion:a5ad9146-d2f0-43f8-b548-80fdfab5139ePost:da320aa3-2824-4bdc-bbfe-840b44293386">Re: Our unforgettable Engagement Party!</a>:
    [QUOTE]Have any of you that is calling this rude and quoting etiquette thought about how it might be a cultural thing? Different cultures may have certain traditions and customs that are considered an accepted norm that you don't know about. In my culture, the bride and her family traditionally host the engagement party and the bride is very actively involved in the planning process. Had I chosen to have an engagement party, I would've planned it as well. In fact, the groom's family arrives at the bride's house lined up with trays of gifts for the bride and her family. There is a reception afterwards which again the bride is involved in planning. Call that AW all you want, but that's what has been done by our people for centuries. It is not anyone's place to call it rude. 
    Posted by t12ubeauty[/QUOTE]

    Harming innocent animals is not a cultural thing.
     
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    thurtathurta member
    First Comment
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_just-engaged-proposals_our-unforgettable-engagement-party?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:683Discussion:a5ad9146-d2f0-43f8-b548-80fdfab5139ePost:5705cac3-00ef-403d-a205-3272ddb58918">Re: Our unforgettable Engagement Party!</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Our unforgettable Engagement Party! : Why would you engage in such poor etiquette? I'm feeling really bad for those poor fish!  Must have been like being in a pot of water that was too warm.
    Posted by kmmssg[/QUOTE]
     Wow! who died and made you queen of ettiquette? Get over yourself, it's my engagement and I can celebrate how I want to!!! Just like the OP can! You should be ashamed of youself for putting her down when she is just trying to share her happiness!
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    t12ubeautyt12ubeauty member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_just-engaged-proposals_our-unforgettable-engagement-party?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:683Discussion:a5ad9146-d2f0-43f8-b548-80fdfab5139ePost:66edea55-a35d-4a41-89d0-be1d182d70ca">Re: Our unforgettable Engagement Party!</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Our unforgettable Engagement Party! : Harming innocent animals is not a cultural thing.
    Posted by HobokenBride2012[/QUOTE]

    <div>I was obviously talking about the engagement plannng part, not the animal part. </div>
    image

    We got married 11/3/12!!

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