Ushers

ldawngirl · September 2010

Do we need to have ushers at our wedding? I know it's a traditional thing to have someone helping guests to their seats, but since many ceremonies nowadays don't have the same rules imposed on seating (bride/groom's sides), I don't know if this is required. The only issue I can see arising is ensuring that there are seats at the front for parents, but perhaps there's another way to solve this?

bablingbrooke · September 2010

Will the wedding police bust the place up if you don't have ushers? No.

Will you still be legally married without ushers? Yes.

Can they be helpful if you have a lot of guests? Yes.

mbcdefg · September 2010

We didn't have separate ushers at my wedding, and to my knowledge there were no big problems (I didn't get into the church until about 60 seconds before I actually walked down the aisle). I don't think I've been to many weddings where there were separate ushers ... usually the groomsmen just escort people before the ceremony starts.

I think my brother/groomsman may have been escorting people to their seats, I'm not sure. His only main job was to escort our mother down the aisle in the processional. MH and our Best Man were hanging out in the vestibule with our priest so they didn't help seat people.

The only issue MH mentioned is that a lot more people, including mutual friends, sat on "my side" than "his side," so in the photos his side looks a bit empty and that kind of depressed him. MH said he wished my brother would've filled in the seats on MH's side ... but in my brother's defense, (a) that was never brought up before the wedding, (b) my brother was never in a wedding before and hadn't been to a wedding in years, and (c) he was 20 at the time and just might not have thought of it.

Unless someone's a total boob, I'd think that they'll know that the front seats are reserved for the parents and bridal party. But you could always put "Reserved" signs on their chairs if you wish.

waltzingmatilda13 · September 2010

You don't have to have them, but it can help with seating, like you said.

We used our GMs as ushers. They were already there and all dressed up, so it made sense.

If you don't want to have them at all you can reserve the first few rows in a couple ways: put programs down on the seats (universal "this seat is taken" symbol) or rope off some rows with draped fabric, or even put a reserved sign at the end of the rows. I think most people understand that family should be in the first rows anyways and I would be surprised if anyone actually sat there, but if it bothers you, section it off.

ldawngirl · September 2010

I hadn't thought about using the GM, but that would work out very well! Thanks!

marissa_claire · September 2010

Ushers are good for a lot more than seating people - they should also be able to help people find places and other info. Ushers can tell them where restrooms are, where to place gifts, answer questions about the timeline, and it might even be helpful if they know how to get from the ceremony to reception. They don't simply have to seat people, so think about other functions they could help out on.

bablingbrooke · September 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_ushers-9?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:93b326fa-fc5c-46dd-ad29-5f9beef1f699Post:5b4dd337-a3c9-4b3d-8872-c8d44faace57">Re: Ushers</a>:
[QUOTE]Ushers are good for a lot more than seating people - they should also be able to help people find places and other info. Ushers can tell them where restrooms are, where to place gifts, answer questions about the timeline, and it might even be helpful if they know how to get from the ceremony to reception. They don't simply have to seat people, so think about other functions they could help out on.
Posted by marissa_claire[/QUOTE]
I think you're confusing ushers with venue staff? And ideally you provided your guests with directions from the ceremony to the reception.

balasj · September 2010

I actually agree a little with Marisa - I think that many guests, especially more traditional, older guests may look out for the birdal party members for simple things as they are most likely a bit more clued in than the other guests. I'm not saying force them to work per say but having a few GM or ushers at the front of the church or what not is a simple way to help keep organization - which may include a few of those simple tasks. I'm sure they would graciously help out a guest looking for assistance. This does apply a bit more to the church and if you had a rehearsal, etc. Its certainly not necessary and depends on your plans and people involved. I'm very traditional though.

DavidandAmyClark · September 2010

OP,
I don't think you really NEED ushers at all, I have been to plenty of weddings without them.

We are planning on having them for two reasons:
1) we are getting married on a roof top balcony so there is a long way from the front door to the seating area, and stairs so they can point people in the right direction and help anyone who needs it.

2) FI has 3 brothers, and none of them are groomsmen so it helps us to include them as well. (This is important to FMIL.)

I would say if you don't have anybody glaringly obvious, don't sweat it. And if it bothers you to have seating unsupervised the GMs can help too.

Ushers

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