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Wedding Invitations & Paper
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What did I do wrong?

BoobopgirlBoobopgirl member
First Comment
in Wedding Invitations & Paper
So...my invites only have one envelope, but i addressed some of them to Mr. and Mrs. so and so and family.  But for whatever reason, some of them are now telling me (accusing) that I didn't invite their kids and I know that I did.  Why are they not understanding that "and family" means "the people that live under your general roof."
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Re: What did I do wrong?

  • NYCMercedesNYCMercedes member
    Sixth Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Nothing? Maybe they wanted each child's name listed. Some people are hard to please. Let it go.
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  • AddieCakeAddieCake member
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 25 Answers
    When they call and complain, tell them, "Your kids ARE invited. That's why I wrote 'and family' on your invitation." 
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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  • banana468banana468 member
    Knottie Warrior 25000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Just clarify that the 'and family' meant the kids.

    For the future, you should have written out the children's names on the invitation.

    Writing 'and family' is OK on things like a Christmas card.   The idea is that it's a general message.    The wedding invitation is specific.   You want certain people to be there and you need a head count.   That begins by being specific with names on the invitation.
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  • JoanE2012JoanE2012 member
    5000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 5 Answers
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_invites-paper_what-did-i-do-wrong?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:cd062f89-8272-496a-b0ab-225e1f87acecDiscussion:4063f0eb-8eb2-49a7-acb4-ef2fb4e524f2Post:0d51ce37-2de0-4d6d-877f-460d87ab80a6">Re: What did I do wrong?</a>:
    [QUOTE]Just clarify that the 'and family' meant the kids. For the future, you should have written out the children's names on the invitation. Writing 'and family' is OK on things like a Christmas card.   The idea is that it's a general message.    The wedding invitation is specific.   You want certain people to be there and you need a head count.   That begins by being specific with names on the invitation.
    Posted by banana468[/QUOTE]<div>
    </div><div>Ditto.  Also, we did "The Smith Family" for the outer envelope.  The inner envelope listed everyone's name.

    </div>
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  • lovesclimbinglovesclimbing member
    Seventh Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    I wrote Mr. and Mrs. and family on all of the invitations where there were children in the household.  Everyone who attended who had kids brought their kids: no confusion.

    I honestly do not understand how people can think that "and family" does not include kids.  Who the heck does it include then?
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  • Jen4948Jen4948 member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    You did nothing wrong.  Unfortunately, there are those out there who: 1) get pissy no matter what, 2) want their kids to be invited to and part of everything, if not the actual center of attention, and 3) don't understand or care about invitation etiquette.

    Even though the etiquette holds that people are supposed to "understand" that if their kids' names are not listed, then they are not invited, and that "and family" means that the entire household, kids included are invited, all too often they don't get it and situations like yours come up.  But then again, that's why so many people make etiquette inquires in the first place-because they don't know or aren't sure.
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