Wedding Woes

To Cancel or Not

So here's the story as briefly as I can possibly make it.  My family is full of drama.  I didn't want a wedding in the first place because of this but my fiancé really did and of course I want him to be happy.  As a side note, both of our first marriages were at the court house.  This time he wants to do it right!

To start my parents are going through a divorce, which is rather nasty since my dad moved out and into his GF's house. Neither can agree on anything and don't speak except through their attorneys. I should also mention here that at one point my dad said he wouldn't come because of all the family issues but later changed his mind.

One of my sisters and my father are in a legal battle over a business they bought together. My sister is getting a restraining order on my father today as he keeps harassing her at the place of business they own jointly and causing scenes in front of the customers!

Neither of my sisters are speaking to each other (both are my only attendants by the way), as my baby sister found out my middle sister poached on her 3 year live in boyfriend. She has texts to confirm this from the middle sis to the bf and other events around the time of the incident make me believe my baby sister.

Overall, while I'm not arguing with any of my family members none of them are speaking to each other.

My fiancé and I had a massive fight about this last night as I want to cancel the wedding. I don't want a wedding with my family there but I don't want one without them. His take is that no wedding we don't get married. 

Other than the family drama, the wedding itself has been a tremendous nightmare:

Photographer - accidently double booked but was nice enough to find me another photographer for the same price/package.

DJ - original DJ never responded to a single email, phone call (he was recommended) I fired him and got a new one but am fighting to get my original deposit back

Dress - went to my third and final fitting only to find out it doesn't look right and they can't fix it so I have to go back and find a WHOLE NEW DRESS!  I loved my dress but it looked horrible.  The one I had tried on was a size too small (I could zip it up but breathing was optional and sitting was not an option at all).  My sisters both flew out to help me find a dress but now I don't have anyone to go with me dress shopping as I only recently moved here (my fiance is military) and don't know many people.

Well, that's my wedding nightmare.  Thanks for listening to me vent!

Re: To Cancel or Not

  • *waiting for flying head story*
    image
  • you don't need a wedding, you need to go on Jerry Springer. 
  • WzzWzz member
    2500 Comments 250 Love Its Second Anniversary Name Dropper
    so invite his family, and don't invite yours. easy peasy. if you don't even like these people, then does it matter if they know they weren't important enough to be at the wedding?
  • Wow, that's a lot. I'm sorry you're going through all this.
    Can you guys elope, and have a beautiful ceremony somewhere, just the 2 of you?  Even though no family would be there, would he be open to something like that?  That way you'll be married, have a lovely ceremony/honeymoon, and no drama.  You can always go out to celebrate with his family upon your return.
  • If you just go to the courthouse, your family won't be there anyway, right?  So this family situation doesn't change if you have a courthouse wedding or a fancy wedding.  And you FI wants it.

    So, invite them.  They can come/refuse as they wish.  Refuse to talk to them about each other at all.  and honestly?  Hire a security guard to watch them and escort them out if trouble starts.  I'd keep them from getting any liquor too.  They all want to act like children, they can be babysat like them.

    The rest sucks, but will work itself out it sounds like.  Is the tailor/wedding dress store helping you with the new dress cost at all?
  • first of all,.EVERYONE has issues with wedding venders. you win some, you lose some! (We fired our photographer...) secondly , I don't think you should deny you and your FI the wedding that you deserve. invite the people you WANT to be there. let them decide if they want to come. and then enjoy your day! I think you should hire a couple security guards and stick to a beer and wine reception. nothing like crazy people taking shots... Best of luck to you. sorry you have to deal with this craziness.
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