Wedding Customs & Traditions Forum

What's the ring bearer do then?

My fiance told me a few days ago that he doesn't want our ring bearer actually carrying our rings on the pillow and that he's never been to a wedding where the ring bearer does actually carry the rings. He said that the best man usually has them. Not really sure why he doesn't want him to carry the rings, and I can't remember how it went at the weddings that I've been to. Our wedding is less than a month away and I don't know what to do. We have a ring bearer and his parents have already rented the tuxedo. Input?

Re: What's the ring bearer do then?

  • Wander the aisle, look adorable, fall occasionally, and generally chew the scenery.
    Don't make me mobilize OffensiveKitten

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  • I have definitely heard of this before. People don't want to take the chance of a young child losing the rings because the string came loose, etc. The ring bearer is just a symbolic position, a reason for many to put a young boy they may be close to in the wedding. I have seen them carry the pillow with fake rings tied to it & the Groom gets the actual weddiing rings from the Best Man. 

    I am having my nephew as my ring bearer and he most likely will just carry a little pillow, strut down the aisle, looking cute & stand up with the Groomsmen & be in the wedding pictures, which is really all I want, LOL. 
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  • Thanks. I didn't know if this was weird or not, but it seems pretty common.
  • edited March 2013
    We did the same as Stage, and we weren't concerned he would lose the real rings because our RB was 7. All the same, he didn't get them until right before the processional started.

    ETA: My point being, if you have a super young RB (3-4), he shouldn't get the real rings.
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  • My son didn't carry a pillow. He had them in his pocket and handed them over to my H when the priest asked for them.

    I was hella cute; he looked so grown up.
  • Our ring bearer (our 17 month old son...he's freaking adorable if I do say so myself) is not carrying anything.  Odds are, even if it were just a pillow, he'd throw it or try to eat it lol.  I've seen a lot of weddings with no rings or fake ones...no one will notice because once you're up there, guests are focused on you two and not where the rings are coming from.
  • I think it depends on the kid. My godson is ours, he is just the cutest best little boy around! We are making a box with a his and her side for him to carry. I saw it on pinterest. He will be 7 by the wedding and I think he is responsible enough to carry the rings down the aisle. He knows he has a big job that day and is so excited for it I hate to not have him carry the actual rings.
    Bunny ??
  • We're having my son and his sister (they are 3) walk down the aisle together holding a flower each. I'm thinking they might carry a sign that says "here comes the bride" to announce that the bridal party march was starting.
  • My church highly recommends that the ring bearer not actually carry the rings, because of the liability if he were to drop or lose them.
    "I give you this ring as a symbol of my vow, and with all that I am, and all that I have, I honor you."image
    July 12, 2013
  • [QUOTE]This always cracks me up. Unless you are having an outdoor wedding with no aisle runner, I think it's just silly. So the RB drops the rings. You've got what, 30ft of possible aisle where they might have fallen. Unless he's running around all day with them, it's not likely that they will be lost forever.
    Posted by StageManager14[/QUOTE]

    <div>I'm a preschool teacher.  You would be surprised at what a small child with a priceless object in uncomfortable clothing can accomplish in 30 feet.</div>
    "I give you this ring as a symbol of my vow, and with all that I am, and all that I have, I honor you."image
    July 12, 2013
  • I guess if we had a young boy we were close to, we'd consider having a ring bearer, but I never really thought of what he would 'do.' I suppose I figured he would do just as some have said, and carry the rings.  Well tied to a pillow or well-secured in a box, or something.

    Now that you bring it up....how about buying two really ridiculous, over the top toy rings (a ring pop and a ring shaped like a skull?) and having him carry these?  You could use them in the rehearsal too.  They could be a lot of fun to give to your best man and maid of honor?  Party prize for the wedding guests?  One for this same young man (pirate ring) one for the flower girl (flower shaped ring?)

    Maybe  make it something fun and cute, not just 'fake rings' for decorative purposes?
  • My ring bearer is my adorable niece who is 3, is that too young? I am afraid she might swallow the rings- real or fake!lol
  • edited April 2013
    In Response to Re:What's the ring bearer do then?:In Response to Re:What's the ring bearer do then?:My church highly recommends that the ring bearer not actually carry the rings, because of the liability if he were to drop or lose them. Posted by woodschr This always cracks me up. Unless you are having an outdoor wedding with no aisle runner, I think it's just silly. So the RB drops the rings. You've got what, 30ft of possible aisle where they might have fallen. Unless he's running around all day with them, it's not likely that they will be lost forever. Posted by StageManager14 Yes but I wouldnt want to be bothered with having to look for them or stopping the ceremony so someone can bend down and grab them. It's easier to just have an adult take care of the rings. It doesnt have to be the best man. My dad held them for my sisters wedding. I definitely would not trust any child with our rings. Children are just too unpredictable.
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