XP - Money dance thank you's?

mdupon70997 · April 2013

We did the money dance at our wedding (which is really common and expected in the New Orleans area.) I've been trying to keep track of all of the gifts we got for our wedding so that I can send thank you cards out soon. But I'm confused as to how it works with the money dancce. There was no way to keep track of ALL of the people we danced with for this dance. I'd love to thank everyone who gave us a monetary gift, but I'm really confused as to how. And we have absolutely no clue as to who gave what amount of money.

mcahil1 · April 2013

You don't thank them for their money given during the money dance. You really never know how much someone gave or remember every person that you and your husband danced with that night during. People don't expect a thank you for the money given during that time. A thank you note for the wedding gift is perfect.

Nolagirl12 · April 2013

Im thinking of doing a money dance too. What type of song would you dance too. I know it should be slow but have no clue. Any ideas?

JoanE2012 · April 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_louisiana-new-orleans_xp-money-dance-thank-yous?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:84Discussion:2f099d28-d8f4-4e53-b6fb-d7c0fd59ebb2Post:8048eef0-4bd4-4482-b925-ccd866f0ed7f">Re:XP Money dance thank you's?</a>:
[QUOTE]Im thinking of doing a money dance too. What type of song would you dance too. I know it should be slow but have no clue. Any ideas?
Posted by Nolagirl12[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>Don't do it. Money dances are rude. Haven't your guests spent enough money on you already? Do you really need to ask for more?

</div>

mdupon70997 · April 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_louisiana-new-orleans_xp-money-dance-thank-yous?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:84Discussion:2f099d28-d8f4-4e53-b6fb-d7c0fd59ebb2Post:4a81b89c-6bf3-4bcc-8e7f-79f1f66b7340">Re:XP Money dance thank you's?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re:XP Money dance thank you's? : Don't do it. Money dances are rude. Haven't your guests spent enough money on you already? Do you really need to ask for more?
Posted by JoanE2012[/QUOTE]

<div>Like I stated in my original post, the money dance is very common here in the New Orleans area. It's actually an expected part of the reception. Many guests don't give gifts because they would rather give a monetary gift during the money dance. Her name is NOLAgirl. That means she's from New Orleans. No one here thinks it's rude.</div>

mdupon70997 · April 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_louisiana-new-orleans_xp-money-dance-thank-yous?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:84Discussion:2f099d28-d8f4-4e53-b6fb-d7c0fd59ebb2Post:8048eef0-4bd4-4482-b925-ccd866f0ed7f">Re:XP Money dance thank you's?</a>:
[QUOTE]Im thinking of doing a money dance too. What type of song would you dance too. I know it should be slow but have no clue. Any ideas?
Posted by Nolagirl12[/QUOTE]

<div>
</div><div>NOLAgirl our DJ just chose songs for us. I do remember one of them was the oldie but goodie New Orleans Ladies.</div>

mdupon70997 · April 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_louisiana-new-orleans_xp-money-dance-thank-yous?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:84Discussion:2f099d28-d8f4-4e53-b6fb-d7c0fd59ebb2Post:4a81b89c-6bf3-4bcc-8e7f-79f1f66b7340">Re:XP Money dance thank you's?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re:XP Money dance thank you's? : Don't do it. <strong>Money dances are rude</strong>. Haven't your guests spent enough money on you already? Do you really need to ask for more?
Posted by JoanE2012[/QUOTE]

<div>For our money dance the lines to dance with both my husband and myself were so long that the DJ had to play three or four songs. I guess that was because people thought it was such a rude thing to do.</div>

Nolagirl12 · April 2013

Thank you. i am from New Orleans and I don't think money dances are rude either. I just went to 2 weddings in the last year and both had money dances. It was alot of fun and the bride and groom got to meet and greet their guests one by one by dancing. It is a tradition in New Orleans as much as a second line is. In fact, if you goggle money dances you'll see many cultures have them.

bezelpup · April 2013

They are common in the area of Ohio/Pennsylvania I am from also, but I am weird and not having one! I would look into older Elvis and Frank Sinatra songs. Older songs are usually longer and older guests like them. My DJ sent a list of common money dance songs, but I thought some of them were tacky because they mention money to be cute and I think it should be more about private moments with your guests.

bezelpup · April 2013

I didn't know money dances were considered rude until I joined the Knot. Unless you are somehow forcing guests to participate and pay, I don't see how it's rude.

mdupon70997 · April 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_louisiana-new-orleans_xp-money-dance-thank-yous?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:84Discussion:2f099d28-d8f4-4e53-b6fb-d7c0fd59ebb2Post:4fc5165f-8a47-4f65-9caf-275d0a6701d9">Re:XP Money dance thank you's?</a>:
[QUOTE]I didn't know money dances were considered rude until I joined the Knot. Unless you are somehow forcing guests to participate and pay, I don't see how it's rude.
Posted by bezelpup[/QUOTE]

<div>
</div><div>I 100% agree. I've been to so many weddings and have danced with so many grooms (and brides) just to spend a few moments with them. No one is saying give me $100 bills. But it's a tradition. If you don't want to participate you don't have to. And I think that if the money dance lasts for three songs, then no one else thinks it's rude either.</div>

JoanE2012 · April 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_louisiana-new-orleans_xp-money-dance-thank-yous?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:84Discussion:2f099d28-d8f4-4e53-b6fb-d7c0fd59ebb2Post:e73eda8e-7515-40eb-8e0b-1f364b9e6181">Re:XP Money dance thank you's?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re:XP Money dance thank you's? : Like I stated in my original post, the money dance is very common here in the New Orleans area. It's actually an expected part of the reception. Many guests don't give gifts because they would rather give a monetary gift during the money dance. <strong>Her name is NOLAgirl. That means she's from New Orleans. No one here thinks it's rude.</strong>
Posted by mdupon70997[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>That is an awful generalization. How would you think it's NOT rude when people already have given you a wedding gift (and maybe an engagement and shower gift). If you really cared about dancing with your guests, you'd do it as a well wishes or anything other than money. Otherwise it just looks like a money grab.
</div>

Nolagirl12 · April 2013

In Response to Re:XP Money dance thank you's?:[QUOTE]In Response to Re:XP Money dance thank you's?:In Response to Re:XP Money dance thank you's? : Like I stated in my original post, the money dance is very common here in the New Orleans area. It's actually an expected part of the reception. Many guests don't give gifts because they would rather give a monetary gift during the money dance. Her name is NOLAgirl. That means she's from New Orleans. No one here thinks it's rude.Posted by mdupon70997That is an awful generalization. nbsp;How would you think it's NOT rude when people already have given you a wedding gift and maybe an engagement and shower gift. nbsp;If you really cared about dancing with your guests, you'd do it as a well wishes or anything other than money. nbsp;Otherwise it just looks like a money grab. Posted by JoanE2012[/QUOTE]
JoanE2012 why dont you just get off this board. You obviously have no clue. Oh and by the way, no one asked you. Now shut up already!!!!

JoanE2012 · April 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_louisiana-new-orleans_xp-money-dance-thank-yous?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:84Discussion:2f099d28-d8f4-4e53-b6fb-d7c0fd59ebb2Post:23dbcd66-46d5-4a22-82d9-8bdf69681a5d">Re:XP Money dance thank you's?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re:XP Money dance thank you's?: JoanE2012 why dont you just get off this board. You obviously have no clue. Oh and by the way, no one asked you. Now shut up already!!!!
Posted by Nolagirl12[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>LOL! You are funny. The beauty of PUBLIC internet forums is I can go anywhere. </div><div>
</div><div>See, I have a clue. It's those that think it's appropriate that guests have to PAY to talk and dance with their guests when their guests already have given them gifts that are clueless. Keep it classy and mingle with your guests through the night and don't make them pay for this "privilege".

</div>

sfinnin · April 2013

All fighting aside, whether you do the money dance is up to you. I can see why people would think it's rude if they're not from here, but honestly it's done at almost every wedding here so I don't think people in Nola see it that way. My husband and I weren't all that into doing it, but we decided it would be funny to do a little twist and do it to a different kind of song...so we used Got Money by Lil Wayne. We had a pretty fun loving, young crowd and they thought it was hilarious. So if you're concerned about people thinking it's rude, maybe you can make it less serious by doing it to a funny song?

sfinnin · April 2013

Oh, and just to add to it...we danced the WHOLE night and got to spend alot of time dancing and mingling with our guests. So I don't think that those that didn't participate in the money dance felt like we weren't spending time with them. Bottom line, do what you feel is right for you...it's not like people are going to look back on your wedding and criticize the fact that you did the money dance. and if they do, who cares??? It's YOUR wedding!

mdupon70997 · April 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_louisiana-new-orleans_xp-money-dance-thank-yous?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:84Discussion:2f099d28-d8f4-4e53-b6fb-d7c0fd59ebb2Post:360d52e5-437f-4818-bdd0-f7799197f640">Re: XP - Money dance thank you's?</a>:
[QUOTE]Oh, and just to add to it...we danced the WHOLE night and got to spend alot of time dancing and mingling with our guests. <strong>So I don't think that those that didn't participate in the money dance felt like we weren't spending time with them</strong>. Bottom line, do what you feel is right for you...it's not like people are going to look back on your wedding and criticize the fact that you did the money dance. and if they do, who cares??? It's YOUR wedding!
Posted by sfinnin[/QUOTE]

<div>
</div><div>Exactly.</div>

mdupon70997 · April 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_louisiana-new-orleans_xp-money-dance-thank-yous?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:84Discussion:2f099d28-d8f4-4e53-b6fb-d7c0fd59ebb2Post:f446b9f2-0b70-42c4-b642-63b4a759dc79">Re: XP - Money dance thank you's?</a>:
[QUOTE]All fighting aside, whether you do the money dance is up to you. I can see why people would think it's rude if they're not from here, <strong>but honestly it's done at <u>almost every wedding here</u> so I don't think people in Nola see it that way.</strong> My husband and I weren't all that into doing it, but we decided it would be funny to do a little twist and do it to a different kind of song...so we used Got Money by Lil Wayne. We had a pretty fun loving, young crowd and they thought it was hilarious. So if you're concerned about people thinking it's rude, maybe you can make it less serious by doing it to a funny song?
Posted by sfinnin[/QUOTE]

<div>Exactly</div>

JoanE2012 · April 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_louisiana-new-orleans_xp-money-dance-thank-yous?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:84Discussion:2f099d28-d8f4-4e53-b6fb-d7c0fd59ebb2Post:f446b9f2-0b70-42c4-b642-63b4a759dc79">Re: XP - Money dance thank you's?</a>:
[QUOTE]All fighting aside, whether you do the money dance is up to you. I can see why people would think it's rude if they're not from here, but honestly it's done at almost every wedding here so I don't think people in Nola see it that way. My husband and I weren't all that into doing it, but we decided it would be funny to do a little twist and do it to a different kind of song...<strong>so we used Got Money by Lil Wayne</strong>. We had a pretty fun loving, young crowd and they thought it was hilarious. So if you're concerned about people thinking it's rude, maybe you can make it less serious by doing it to a funny song?
Posted by sfinnin[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>Just when I thought it couldn't get any worse.....

</div>

sfinnin · April 2013

Joan, for someone that seems so in touch with what's rude at a wedding, you sure are being quite rude to all of us on this forum. Yes, it is a public forum, but aren't we all trying to either plan or give advice to others planning a wedding? It's a big night in all of our lives, one that should be filled with happy memories... and haven't we all had to deal with enough rude people that ask rude questions about our weddings, or give their opinions when we didn't ask for them? I wish you the best in your upcoming wedding and if you're already married, then congratulations and best wishes for a happy marriage, but please, if you don't have something positive to contribute to this board, then please leave the brides alone who are trying to happily plan their wedding. Nobody needs the negativity that you are spewing.

Nolagirl12 · April 2013

I couldnt have said it better. Thanks for sticking up for us NOla brides.

mdupon70997 · April 2013

In Response to Re: XP - Money dance thank you's?:
[QUOTE]I've never participated in one, but I always thought people just pinned a dollar on you. Doesn't it seem more likely that they will give you a card with a check or cash?
Posted by louisianablue[/QUOTE]

Blue, we didn't have our guest pin the money onto our clothes because it takes quite a while sometimes and because I didn't want anyone sticking themselves with a pin and getting blood on the dress and or the tuxedo. I borrowed a white satin bag from a friend which was used to hold the money for her money dance and it worked wonderfully. At a wedding that I was a part of last year, the bride's godfather had an antique cash register that he brought with him to the receptioin. People gave the money to him and he stuck it in the cash drawer. It was really cute!

Bestbank Bride · May 2013

I will not even begin to get into whether or not OTHER people should be doing this at their own weddings (because, frankly, I'd probably boot someone in the chin if they tried to tell me what to do at MINE- as the potato chip commercial used to say: "Get your OWN bag!") but I WILL throw in my opinion (Hooray for public forums!?).

I was born and raised in New Orleans and went to NUMEROUS weddings there throughout my childhood and adulthood, as recently as December 2011. While money dances were certainly done at a number of them, I'd say about half didn't have them. Frankly, I have always gone back and forth on whether or not this is tacky or if it is just fun. PERSONALLY, I lean towards tacky, but Y'ALL can do what you want. I feel super-weird about accepting cash from people after they have already had an opportunity to buy me a gift (that's what the registry is for, in my opinion).

Furthermore, my family and a lot of our friends, both local New Orleanians AND those we've made out-of-state, would be unlikely to bring cash with them specifically for this purpose. I say this only to suggest that while it may be 'traditional' and done 'a lot', people still do not automatically assume it's going to happen (I feel confident that no one in my family would be stopping by the ATM to ensure cash just in case this dance happened at our wedding- more likely, they'd be surprised, there'd be muttering like 'Really? They DO this? Still?', and it would just make the whole thing awkward. Some people might be all, 'Oh, yeah! Money Dance!' and be throwing dolla dolla billz y'all, but not enough of them to make me feel good about including this in our plan.

Now currently, we live out of state. More than half our guests are traveling to the wedding from far away, meaning they taking off of work, paying for transportation, hotel, other meals and incidentals, possibly an outfit, possibly a gift (we don't expect them), etc. Ultimately, it is far more important that they be there at all, so we're not holding our breath for gifts on top of that. Because they are already spending so much money, I would nevernevernever ask them to pull even a single dollar bill out of their wallet, but THAT IS JUST ME.

My final two cents: Do whatcha' wanna. If people REALLY think it's tacky or gauche, it's entirely your fault for inviting them. People who love you won't give a crap.

(And for the record, after writing this out, I'm ALMOST tempted to do one myself, except our wedding is really small, and the thought of standing there awkwardly while people scrounge for money or decline to dance with us is mortifying and I would die on the spot. If you've got a big family with generous pockets, I've seen bags stuffed with money. If you're in that kind of family, I'd like to invite you all to MY wedding.)

[QUOTE]We did the money dance at our wedding (which is really common and expected in the New Orleans area.) I've been trying to keep track of all of the gifts we got for our wedding so that I can send thank you cards out soon. But I'm confused as to how it works with the money dancce. There was no way to keep track of ALL of the people we danced with for this dance. I'd love to thank everyone who gave us a monetary gift, but I'm really confused as to how. And we have absolutely no clue as to who gave what amount of money.
Posted by mdupon70997[/QUOTE]

shayzeller · June 2013

shayzeller · June 2013

kdavis14 · July 2013

It's amazing how people comment on something you didn't ask them about. Just give everyone who attended the wedding a Thank You note.Its not all about money and gifts. Thank them for being there on your big day. Or at least thats what I will probably be doing.

XP - Money dance thank you's?

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