Hi, I'm new to this board but I really needed a place to vent. Our wedding is a month away and we've just lost a groomsmen. He was an old coworker of my FH and today he sent a message that he couldn't be a groomsmen anymore since his wife felt she wasn't included in the wedding.
It started last Sunday when the guys went to get measured for their tux. We didn't really have a get together planned, it was just the guys going to Mens Warehouse and she was upset that I didn't ask her to hangout. I didn't think much of it at the time until yesterday I got a text from FH asking if it was too late to have another bridesmaid. Since we had to custom order dresses for everyone I told him that there wouldn't be enough time to order her a dress to match. He asked if there was anything that she could help with and I mentioned that we could use some help assembling centerpieces if she'd like. I said I would ask her over FB but it slipped my mind yesterday.
It feels so strange, I went to her baby shower and met her only once. Since we both have young kids it's hard to find time to get together. The only wedding things I've done with my bridesmaids so far was ordering our dresses online and assembling invites about a month ago. Should I have tried harder to include her?
Re: Was I too Insensitive?
[QUOTE]Hi, I'm new to this board but I really needed a place to vent. Our wedding is a month away and we've just lost a groomsmen. He was an old coworker of my FH and today he sent a message that he couldn't be a groomsmen anymore since his wife felt she wasn't included in the wedding. It started last Sunday when the guys went to get measured for their tux. We didn't really have a get together planned, it was just the guys going to Mens Warehouse and she was upset that I didn't ask her to hangout. I didn't think much of it at the time until yesterday I got a text from FH asking if it was too late to have another bridesmaid. Since we had to custom order dresses for everyone I told him that there wouldn't be enough time to order her a dress to match. He asked if there was anything that she could help with and I mentioned that we could use some help assembling centerpieces if she'd like. I said I would ask her over FB but it slipped my mind yesterday. It feels so strange, I went to her baby shower and met her only once. Since we both have young kids it's hard to find time to get together. The only wedding things I've done with my bridesmaids so far was ordering our dresses online and assembling invites about a month ago. Should I have tried harder to include her?
Posted by ChristinaP89[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>I think the groomsman's wife is crazy pants. Are you friends with the woman outside of FI's friendship with her husband? She is especially crazy if you are not.
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[QUOTE]In Response to Was I too Insensitive? : I think the groomsman's wife is crazy pants. Are you friends with the woman outside of FI's friendship with her husband? She is especially crazy if you are not.
Posted by AprilH81[/QUOTE]
Thank you so much for your response, I really needed someone elses perspective. We are "friends" on facebook but the only time I've met her was at her baby shower and I never talk to her at all. I feel bad since she seemed so pleasant to me the one time we met.
[QUOTE]She's nutty. Ignore it.
Posted by 1covejack[/QUOTE]
I'm more worried about my FH friendship with his ex-groomsmen. Is there a tackful way to talk to her about this?
The GM's wife is nuts. Ignore her. Tell your FI you are sorry that this crazy lady has decided to go cookoo and force her H to drop out.
You shouldn't have to do anything to include her because you don't know her nor are you friends with her and your FI should understand and respect that.
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Was I too Insensitive? : Thank you so much for your response, I really needed someone elses perspective. We are "friends" on facebook but the only time I've met her was at her baby shower and I never talk to her at all. I feel bad since she seemed so pleasant to me the one time we met.
Posted by ChristinaP89[/QUOTE]
<div>No sane person expects to be a bridesmaid for a woman she has met once. No matter how close her husband is to the bride's fiance.</div><div>
</div><div>She is worse than crazy pants, she is bat crap crazy. lol</div>
She is concerned about her husband walking down the aisle with a bridesmaid (another woman?) She is either irrationally jealous, or gunshy because he has been or formally did actually cheat on her. It's her insecurity showing here. I feel badly for her.
Valid concern based on her legitimate experience with a cheater, or delusion, it's sad, yes, either way?
Hope all ends up being OK and you have a fantastic day, regardless of insecure psychos
[QUOTE]Hi, I'm new to this board but I really needed a place to vent. Our wedding is a month away and we've just lost a groomsmen. He was an old coworker of my FH and today he sent a message that he couldn't be a groomsmen anymore since his wife felt she wasn't included in the wedding. It started last Sunday when the guys went to get measured for their tux. We didn't really have a get together planned, it was just the guys going to Mens Warehouse and she was upset that I didn't ask her to hangout. I didn't think much of it at the time until yesterday I got a text from FH asking if it was too late to have another bridesmaid. Since we had to custom order dresses for everyone I told him that there wouldn't be enough time to order her a dress to match. He asked if there was anything that she could help with and I mentioned that we could use some help assembling centerpieces if she'd like. I said I would ask her over FB but it slipped my mind yesterday. It feels so strange, I went to her baby shower and met her only once. Since we both have young kids it's hard to find time to get together. The only wedding things I've done with my bridesmaids so far was ordering our dresses online and assembling invites about a month ago. Should I have tried harder to include her?
Posted by ChristinaP89[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>No, you were not insensitive. How dare she try to weasle her way into your wedding because she is the wife of a groomsman. It is obvious who wears the pants in that relationship. When someone is getting married it is like a flag waving high in the air for everyone and their mother to try to get in on being a part of the wedding. Proper etiquitte is that you have to be ASKED to be an attendent, not ASSUME it would be okay. I hope that groomsman wakes up and realizes how silly he is being for letting her run his life.
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