Wedding Etiquette Forum

Seating in family groups???

I'm working on a tentative seating chart.  Should I seat everyone's family in groups?  Like FI dad's side, then his mom's then mine?  Or do we just put the important people closest to us (our family and our friends) and our parents friends and associates toward the back.  If this means anything-(because I know pay=say)

FI dad's side-paying for beer and wine host bar, appetizers approx 20%

FI mom's side-gave us monetary gift covering approx 10% of the wedding budget

My side gave a monetary gift covering approx 35%

I don't think it really matters because everyone will mingle afterwards, but I just want to make sure I'm not doing anything that will be side-eyed.

Thanks ladies!

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June 1, 2013 - finally making it official!

Re: Seating in family groups???

  • That's what I'm doing. Seat people who know each other together. However, just because they're not close, doesn't mean you should stick them in the back.
  • I understand, but someone has to go in the back, and I'd rather it be FI dad's friends, my parents co-workers, and FI mom's cousins from philadelphia that "just happen to be in town that weekend" than my friend from forever ago.

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    June 1, 2013 - finally making it official!

  • vk2204vk2204 member
    1000 Comments Third Anniversary 100 Love Its Name Dropper
    My MIL made her own seating chart with their side and I did my side with my parents. We had some 11 table tops and some 8 and 9 tops so we put the smaller tables in the middle so there would be less chairs and the tables that had more than 10 had to be on closest to the dance floor.

    Our venue had the dance floor in the center so there were tables on both sides. That made it easier on us for the "who gets to be closest to the bride and groom" game.
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  • Just remember to seat people with others they know, if that's at all possible. I remember my mother being thrown at a random table with some of the bride's childhood neighbors who were "stunned to be invited," but we were the bride's cousins who'd traveled 3,000 miles to be there! All of our relatives were sitting at other tables. It was weird. And I was a flower girl who was initially not invited to the reception...but that's irrelevant. 

    Point is, try to keep people with people who make them happy. Don't seat close relatives with friends who were lucky to get an invite, and don't seat relatives who hate each other together in the hopes that they'll reconcile at your wedding. 

    Beyond that, few people actually care WHERE their table is, but I know that the table next to the kitchen is often considered a lousy table. Otherwise, as long as they're with people they like, you should be fine. 
  • harper0813harper0813 member
    500 Love Its 1000 Comments First Anniversary First Answer
    edited May 2013
    Sit people near you that will want a view of you at dinner. I know someone will come back and say that EVERYONE will want a view - but I bet young cousins and people that don't know you very well won't care either way.

    FI and I will actually be in the middle of the room, so very few seats will be "far away" ones. The far corners will most likely be occupied by the people we don't know very well - parents' friends and extended family members I don't know very well. One of the corner tables near the bar will be reserved for FI's work friends who enjoy drinking. A lot.
  • Okay perfect.  They are all putting their people in tables of 8 and I am placing them, just making sure it doesnt matter where tables are as long as you know people at the table

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    June 1, 2013 - finally making it official!

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