Toonie bar, Tack or tasteful?

[Deleted User] · May 2013

Hey Brides to be!

I hail from Canada, and wanted to have an open bar reception...but unfortunately, I'm not made of money, so would asking the guest to pay two dollars a drink be tacky? Or a good way to cut down on bar costs?

allispain · May 2013

Asking your guests to pay for drinks (even at a reduced cost) is usually not a very good idea. Yes, it saves you some money, but it also is annoying for guests - who have often already paid for gifts, hotel rooms, etc. One good way to save on bar costs would be to just do wine and beer - that way you can still afford an open bar and your guests don't have to pony up extra $$. Or, if that's still not in the budget, you can maybe cut back in another area that isn't as important to you (flowers, less expense table linens, etc.).

Dreamergirl8812 · May 2013

Tacky.

happyfor25 · May 2013

Proper hosting doesn't require the host be "made of money". There are options that don't require your guests to help defray the cost of your party. As PP suggested, you could host beer and wine. You could cut favors, programs, flowers. You could cut your guest list. You could have a lunch/brunch reception where people would likely drink less. You could have a dry wedding (though I am not a fan of this option and *I* would rather pay for my drink BUT asking guests to do so is an etiquette faux pas). It is impolite to ask your guests to pay for anything.

AddieCake · May 2013

Would you invite someone over to your home for dinner and charge them for drinks?

JoanE2012 · May 2013

In Response to Toonie bar, Tack or tasteful?:
[QUOTE]Hey Brides to be! I hail from Canada, and wanted to have an open bar reception...but unfortunately, I'm not made of money, so would asking the guest to pay two dollars a drink be tacky? Or a good way to cut down on bar costs?
Posted by OhHeyItsIna[/QUOTE]

Not many are made of money. We save up for it or we cut back. Charging your guests is not an option.

NYCMercedes · May 2013

Scale down the wedding in other areas so you can afford to host your guests properly. Plan a smaller wedding at a less expensive venue and have it during the afternoon so you can be a gracious hostess.

QueerFemme · May 2013

Tacky

NOLAbridealmost · May 2013

Incredibly tacky.

MyNameIsNot · May 2013

Tacky is for stripper shoes and balloon arches.

Asking your guests to pay for anything is rude.

imimbles_7327508 · May 2013

We can't afford a full open bar, so we're hosting wine and beer (and soft drinks of course). Cut down the price quite a bit.
I wouldn't ask people to pay. I hate the "tacky" word, but I just think it's rude.

CarliGarrett · May 2014

I'm curious about how many people who replied that this was tacky, are actually American? I'm Canadian, and I've never been to a wedding where there hasn't been a toonie or loonie bar. Usually there is complimentary wine, sometimes a one hour open bar for cocktail hour, and then a toonie bar. And the suggestions for people not to serve alcohol or to just serve limited beer and wine? LAME SAUCE! I would be so annoyed if I showed up to a wedding and couldn't drink as much as I want. Another key cultural difference that may be at play here is that many Americans still seem to do a send off dance, or end the party at 10 or 11 (sometimes - God forbid - earlier!). In Canada, or at least the region I'm from, we party for as long as we can stay up. Which means many hours of drinking. Which means a toonie bar is a wicked deal, for everyone.

Maggie0829 · May 2014

CarliGarrett said:

I'm curious about how many people who replied that this was tacky, are actually American? I'm Canadian, and I've never been to a wedding where there hasn't been a toonie or loonie bar. Usually there is complimentary wine, sometimes a one hour open bar for cocktail hour, and then a toonie bar. And the suggestions for people not to serve alcohol or to just serve limited beer and wine? LAME SAUCE! I would be so annoyed if I showed up to a wedding and couldn't drink as much as I want. Another key cultural difference that may be at play here is that many Americans still seem to do a send off dance, or end the party at 10 or 11 (sometimes - God forbid - earlier!). In Canada, or at least the region I'm from, we party for as long as we can stay up. Which means many hours of drinking. Which means a toonie bar is a wicked deal, for everyone.

American or not, you should host your guests completely. And I know a few Canadians who would agree with us Americans so don't say it is just because we are from the US that we don't think toonie bars are tasteful.

Um, so I am guessing people who have a morning wedding with a brunch reception are LAME SAUCE to you huh? Don't lump all Americans into one category cause it kind of makes you look ignorant.

@KnotPorscha - any chance your IT guys have come up with a system to automatically close threads that are a year or more old so zombie threads don't keep popping up?

manateehugger · May 2014

CarliGarrett said:

I'm curious about how many people who replied that this was tacky, are actually American? I'm Canadian, and I've never been to a wedding where there hasn't been a toonie or loonie bar. Usually there is complimentary wine, sometimes a one hour open bar for cocktail hour, and then a toonie bar. And the suggestions for people not to serve alcohol or to just serve limited beer and wine? LAME SAUCE! I would be so annoyed if I showed up to a wedding and couldn't drink as much as I want. Another key cultural difference that may be at play here is that many Americans still seem to do a send off dance, or end the party at 10 or 11 (sometimes - God forbid - earlier!). In Canada, or at least the region I'm from, we party for as long as we can stay up. Which means many hours of drinking. Which means a toonie bar is a wicked deal, for everyone.

Glad you're rude enough to demand that whatever someone hands you for free isn't good enough - what a trashy attitude.

There's actually plenty of Canadian brides around here; there was a recent thread where they all came out to defend the fact that Canadians do, in fact, know how to properly host a wedding.

Toonie bar, Tack or tasteful?

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