No appetizers before the dinner at the reception - is this okay?

rdillardesq · August 2012

So we are getting ready to finalize our venue contract tomorrow. Unfortunately with our choice of venue and the cost per plate for just the buffet and open bar, we can't do any pre-reception appetizers! To make matters worse we have decided to have our ceremony start at about 3:00pm, and then have the reception start at about 5:00pm so we can have time to take pictures at various locations in the city. I have gone to weddings where there were gaps in the ceremony and reception start time, but there were usually appetizers for guests to eat while they were waiting on the bride and groom. How do you feel about this? I don't feel too bad about it because appetizers really aren't in our budget, but I'm starting to feel bummed that people may get offended.

Thoughts?

Klyn1983 · August 2012

Will the ceremony and reception be at the same location? If so, I'd be a little put off to be at a wedding with nothing to do for an hour or more. Is there any way you can rearrange your budget to allow some sort of cocktail hour?

If the venues are separate then I don't think it's a big deal because people can always go somewhere to entertain themselves for that hour.

rdillardesq · August 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_michigan-detroit_no-appetizers-before-the-dinner-at-the-reception-is-this-okay?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:88Discussion:50ef4f8f-928e-4d00-aa34-c4f12e8287ddPost:5266dcae-d118-4001-a675-d58638d9b500">Re: No appetizers before the dinner at the reception - is this okay?</a>:
[QUOTE]Will the ceremony and reception be at the same location? If so, I'd be a little put off to be at a wedding with nothing to do for an hour or more. Is there any way you can rearrange your budget to allow some sort of cocktail hour? If the venues are separate then I don't think it's a big deal because people can always go somewhere to entertain themselves for that hour.
Posted by Klyn1983[/QUOTE]

The reception and ceremony are at two different locations for sure. I figured that maybe guests can go off and find something to do for that hour or so, so I hope that is definitely the case! I'm now of the opinion that if people have an issue with it then oh well!

sparkles776 · August 2012

If they are at seperate places, I think it is perfectly fine to not have appetizers. An hour really isnt a long gap at all.

aloisk57 · August 2012

You could also buy some inexpensive deli trays from Costco and have them out at your ceremony venue after the ceremony. I was going to have cider and donuts at my fall wedding at the church after the ceremony because we have a little gap too.

But no, I don't think you need apps if you can't afford it.

LilPrincess102780 · August 2012

Ive been to weddings where there is a gap and no apps and I think it is fine. We just found a local watering hole to kill the hour or so before the reception.

mpickl · August 2012

I agree with PPs. The only thing I would add is to maybe circulate the fact via grapevine or on your wedding website, so people aren't expecting it? Maybe offer some options for people who might not be familiar with the area? Just a thought.

Sue-n-Kevin · August 2012

I understand the budget issue and the rest of it. But mpickl makes a very good point above.

We were invited to a wedding a couple of years ago and the ceremony and reception were in 2 different places. The invitations had a start time for the ceremony, then below that the name and address for the reception venue. There was no mention whatsoever about the start time, so we just assumed it was immediately after. Wrong. We got to the reception venue and the doors were locked. Outside the door was a sign indicating the reception started at 6 pm, more than an hour wait.

So in our wedding finery we found a local dive bar and drank. It was a bit embarrassing. I'm assuming there was some mention to other guests about the start time for the reception, but it was NOT in the invitation.

On the other hand I went to a wedding where the start times were clearly noted. This was out of town, and there was a break of 2 hrs between the end of the ceremony and the reception start time. So we drove back to our hotel and waited it out.

If people know what is happening, they are generally not put out.

spartybride3 · August 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_michigan-detroit_no-appetizers-before-the-dinner-at-the-reception-is-this-okay?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:88Discussion:50ef4f8f-928e-4d00-aa34-c4f12e8287ddPost:e6c50d38-2530-402f-8f8a-bbc80b8ce36a">Re: No appetizers before the dinner at the reception - is this okay?</a>:
[QUOTE]Ive been to weddings where there is a gap and no apps and I think it is fine. We just found a local watering hole to kill the hour or so before the reception.
Posted by LilPrincess102780[/QUOTE]

<div>Ditto. I don't think I've ever been to a wedding where there <u>wasn't</u> a gap. If you feel nervous about it, maybe give them some suggestions on your wedding website or with your invitations where they can go in between. Don't stress about it. People are self sufficient and will find something to do!</div>

rdillardesq · August 2012

Thanks everyone for the suggestions! I definitely will include the start time of the reception on the invitation and I even like having some deli trays in our church basement after the ceremony so people can have a snack before they leave. I hadn't thought of that!

No appetizers before the dinner at the reception - is this okay?

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