My jaw is still on the floor.

AprilH81 · May 2013

OP: I've been thinking about your situation the past few days and I hope things are calming down and getting better. I'm thinking of you!

kmbryant2413 · May 2013

@AprilH81 - Not really. Things between BF and I in particular are getting much better, and my life situation is getting better (securing job in Dallas for my move) but his mom just believes that her children and being pissy and throwing a fit. She brings her BF over every night to try to force her children to get to know him. I told her personally that my mom and stepdad tried to do that (and while I love my stepdad dearly now, my mom had been dating him for 3 years before they got married) it did not work out well. She said it will for her and her children. All the kids just eat later when he leaves. He has cornered me (specifically because I'm not part of the family, I believe) to tell me that he likes everyone and wants to talk. I told him no thank you, that this was not a matter that concerned me.

Everyone is still angry, and hurt, and shocked, but it's smoothing out. Our mentality is a little less explosive and everyone is settling into ignoring him and their mothers. It's still a tough place for me to be in, but I'm settling into helping the girls and helping Mimi. It's going alright.

jenifer jane · May 2013

wow you are in a tough place. I have been there and raised someone else's (Family of my bf / fiancee) kids for 7 years. It snow balls quickly. I also work in long term care with Alzheimers clients. Here's my thoughts.

1.Alzheimers is very difficult to dal with and needs constant care and watching. She will need a home that is suited to her needs and they will help with her to develop and deal with her memory issues and yes eventually violent windows. Alzheimers has windows of behaviour that the person cant control and has nothing to do with personality its the break down of the brain that causes it. She will be happy and you shouldn't feel guilt for getting her safe care with wonderful facilities.

2. It isnt fair to have people ask you to give up your life and youth to enable them to escape their responsibilities. It sounds like she can afford a nanny or private school for her daughters. It also sounds like you are a very loving person and I know you would be visiting the private school and being an amazing auntie. Private school would give them the structure they need and their mom time to regroup her life. Maybe if mom didnt feel like she had to run she could think of what she really wants to do with her life and not rush into things.

Feeling used and pressured to be responsible for other lives because it appears no one else will step up to the plate...sucks. You re a wonderful person that makes a big difference in all these lives but you will lose yourself with all these people pulling at you at once. You need to look after you and regroup what is best for you and the man you love.

Jen

My jaw is still on the floor.

Re: My jaw is still on the floor.

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