It has been almost a week...

AprilH81 · May 2013

... since BF has moved in! So far the transition has gone pretty smoothly. Moe (his cat) has settled in nicely and seems to be more active than she was at his apartment (a good thing because she is a fat cat).

We still have some organizing, and probably some more purging, to get things settled to my standards. Next item on the list is to "train" him (I use that term tongue in cheek) to put his stuff away and not leave a trail of shoes, wallets, phones and other stuff as he comes in the door and makes his way to the couch. lol

I'm looking forward to spending the weekend on some household chores that have been neglected the last few weeks as we were bouncing around between homes. I hope you all have a fabulous Friday and a lovely weekend!

KeptInStitches · May 2013

I solved the "bread crumb trail" by getting a letter organizer with key rack and mounting it near the door. Saves our relationship because then I'm not yelling at him for denting the furniture by banging his keys down on it.

AprilH81 · May 2013

KeptInStitches said:

I solved the "bread crumb trail" by getting a letter organizer with key rack and mounting it near the door. Saves our relationship because then I'm not yelling at him for denting the furniture by banging his keys down on it.

I have one of those already... lol

Our garage is in the back of the house and when you come in that door, there is a closet right there for him to put his coat (and sportscoats) and shoes. Right beside the closet is a chalk board thing with key hooks for him to put his keys and wallet if he wants to. Then you actually enter the kitchen.

When I come in his shoes are usually under the organizer, his sports coat is on the back of a kitchen chair, his wallet and keys are on the kitchen table and he is sitting on the couch watching tv or out for a run if the weather is nice. It irritates me to no end and yet makes me laugh because that is what he did at his apartment. Hopefully I can convince him it is better to put his stuff away as he comes in the door.

radleyboo · May 2013

FI's method of organization is what I like to call 'Piles of Stuff', usually mail or some sort of work he brought home. He leaves piles all over the joint. I consolidate said piles into one pile and put it on top of his dresser. It's about the only thing that drives me nuts about him, so I overlook it most of the time. He's actually a very tidy housemate. I'm the one that leaves shoes all over, I can never find the ones I'm looking for, hopefully I don't drive him too nuts!

peekaboo2011 · May 2013

You might never win that battle. BF looked at me last night when he came over and was like "Peek, I make your bed every morning I'm here. Why can't you do it?" and I said to him "Because I don't have to." I was never required to make my bed, it's a habit that will probably take years after we start living together to deal with.

To my credit, I no longer treat the covers as a wrestling rink, so it's usually only a few pillows out of place and the one corner of the comforter tossed aside.

kmbryant2413 · May 2013

radleyboo said:

FI's method of organization is what I like to call 'Piles of Stuff', usually mail or some sort of work he brought home. He leaves piles all over the joint. I consolidate said piles into one pile and put it on top of his dresser. It's about the only thing that drives me nuts about him, so I overlook it most of the time. He's actually a very tidy housemate. I'm the one that leaves shoes all over, I can never find the ones I'm looking for, hopefully I don't drive him too nuts!

I'm a 'pile-r' ;-; I wonder if BF ever gets super annoyed about it. To be fair, my own piles annoy me, but I'm just not sure what to DO with them. Shoot.

AprilH81 · May 2013

radleyboo said:

FI's method of organization is what I like to call 'Piles of Stuff', usually mail or some sort of work he brought home. He leaves piles all over the joint. I consolidate said piles into one pile and put it on top of his dresser. It's about the only thing that drives me nuts about him, so I overlook it most of the time. He's actually a very tidy housemate. I'm the one that leaves shoes all over, I can never find the ones I'm looking for, hopefully I don't drive him too nuts!

BF does this too... This is something he KNOWS he is bad about and hopefully we will be able to come up with a compromise. His worst "piles" are of his mail. If it isn't a bill he doesn't now what to do with it so it sits there... For MONTHS...

I have a shredder at home so hopefully that problem will go away.

GoldenPenguin · May 2013

AprilH81 said:

radleyboo said:

FI's method of organization is what I like to call 'Piles of Stuff', usually mail or some sort of work he brought home. He leaves piles all over the joint. I consolidate said piles into one pile and put it on top of his dresser. It's about the only thing that drives me nuts about him, so I overlook it most of the time. He's actually a very tidy housemate. I'm the one that leaves shoes all over, I can never find the ones I'm looking for, hopefully I don't drive him too nuts!

BF does this too... This is something he KNOWS he is bad about and hopefully we will be able to come up with a compromise. His worst "piles" are of his mail. If it isn't a bill he doesn't now what to do with it so it sits there... For MONTHS...

I have a shredder at home so hopefully that problem will go away.

I also do this. When I moved out of my apartment into BFs apartment, half the shit I threw away was old mail/catalogs/magazines/flyers/etc. that just sat in piles around my place. We're working on this.

lennonkdc · May 2013

peekaboo2011 said:

You might never win that battle. BF looked at me last night when he came over and was like "Peek, I make your bed every morning I'm here. Why can't you do it?" and I said to him "Because I don't have to." I was never required to make my bed, it's a habit that will probably take years after we start living together to deal with.

To my credit, I no longer treat the covers as a wrestling rink, so it's usually only a few pillows out of place and the one corner of the comforter tossed aside.

^this.

FI and I both do things that drive the other one nuts, but learning to live together is a lot about learning to let stuff go. If it bugs you, pick it up, but don't nag, harp, or act like a martyr. If you have Zero clutter tolerance and he has a moderate clutter tolerance you might have to compromise at 'light clutter'. You will never convert him into a neat freak, b/c some people just don't 'see' the clutter, or dust, or lack of organization. It just doesn't bother them. Don't try to 'train' him, I know you used it tongue and cheek, but still he's a person, not a dog and you're both gonna have to learn a new 'normal'. Such are the joys of co-habitation...

minskat30 · May 2013

Yup, H leaves piles of stuff everywhere too. If he sees me cleaning his piles, he will chip in. If he doesn't, eh...I don't let it bug me.

AprilH81 · May 2013

lennonkdc said:

peekaboo2011 said:

You might never win that battle. BF looked at me last night when he came over and was like "Peek, I make your bed every morning I'm here. Why can't you do it?" and I said to him "Because I don't have to." I was never required to make my bed, it's a habit that will probably take years after we start living together to deal with.

To my credit, I no longer treat the covers as a wrestling rink, so it's usually only a few pillows out of place and the one corner of the comforter tossed aside.

^this.
FI and I both do things that drive the other one nuts, but learning to live together is a lot about learning to let stuff go. If it bugs you, pick it up, but don't nag, harp, or act like a martyr. If you have Zero clutter tolerance and he has a moderate clutter tolerance you might have to compromise at 'light clutter'. You will never convert him into a neat freak, b/c some people just don't 'see' the clutter, or dust, or lack of organization. It just doesn't bother them. Don't try to 'train' him, I know you used it tongue and cheek, but still he's a person, not a dog and you're both gonna have to learn a new 'normal'. Such are the joys of co-habitation...

Yeah, I have zero clutter tolerance and he doesn't "see" clutter, dust or cat hair. We are still working on who will be responsible for what. I don't mind cleaning if he does something that contributes "equally" to the household. We just have to find what that will be. So far my only thought is laundry... lol

Some of my issues are also control issues and I am aware of this. I like everything neat, tidy and in it's place. I've taken care of myself and my home since I first bought a home 10 years ago and the thought of something not getting done annoys me.

Generally speaking I would rather do it myself now than wait 24-48 hours for him to do it when he has time or the inclination. I'm aware that is not healthy and I am trying to let the small things go, but walking in the door after work and tripping over his shoes and "bread crumb trail" is not how I want to start my evening. I'm still a work in progress...

beanbot2002 · May 2013

I'm a pile-r, too.

radleyboo · May 2013

AprilH81 said:

radleyboo said:

FI's method of organization is what I like to call 'Piles of Stuff', usually mail or some sort of work he brought home. He leaves piles all over the joint. I consolidate said piles into one pile and put it on top of his dresser. It's about the only thing that drives me nuts about him, so I overlook it most of the time. He's actually a very tidy housemate. I'm the one that leaves shoes all over, I can never find the ones I'm looking for, hopefully I don't drive him too nuts!

BF does this too... This is something he KNOWS he is bad about and hopefully we will be able to come up with a compromise. His worst "piles" are of his mail. If it isn't a bill he doesn't now what to do with it so it sits there... For MONTHS...

I have a shredder at home so hopefully that problem will go away.

Totally! Why does he need a Keurig magazine from February? "I"m going to order some coffee." No, you're not. If you were, you would have already, and you won't because we just buy it at the grocery store. I end up tossing stuff he claims he wants, but he never ends up asking for it. One of the other problems is that he works at a bank, so he has access to a Super Shredder and private disposal service, so he'll collect our 401k, IRAs, insuranc policies, and 529 statements 'to shred' but then they sit there for weeks waiting to go back to the bank to be shredded. I'm trying to go to digital statements for everything, but there's so much of it, I honestly don't have the time! My next step is to put a box by the garage door that says 'Shred' on it so he can just take it to work, but he walks past the piles so I'm guessing he'll walk past the box too.

Oh well, it's a small price to pay, especially compared to my ex! We won't go there, though, unless you want me to. I have stories that would make your head spin....

KeptInStitches · May 2013

I think part of the reason BF and I got the letter organizer to work so well at my place was neither of us had one before. It was something we picked out together and agreed on together.

peekaboo2011 · May 2013

lennonkdc said:

peekaboo2011 said:

You might never win that battle. BF looked at me last night when he came over and was like "Peek, I make your bed every morning I'm here. Why can't you do it?" and I said to him "Because I don't have to." I was never required to make my bed, it's a habit that will probably take years after we start living together to deal with.

To my credit, I no longer treat the covers as a wrestling rink, so it's usually only a few pillows out of place and the one corner of the comforter tossed aside.

^this.
FI and I both do things that drive the other one nuts, but learning to live together is a lot about learning to let stuff go. If it bugs you, pick it up, but don't nag, harp, or act like a martyr. If you have Zero clutter tolerance and he has a moderate clutter tolerance you might have to compromise at 'light clutter'. You will never convert him into a neat freak, b/c some people just don't 'see' the clutter, or dust, or lack of organization. It just doesn't bother them. Don't try to 'train' him, I know you used it tongue and cheek, but still he's a person, not a dog and you're both gonna have to learn a new 'normal'. Such are the joys of co-habitation...

THIS. We don't even live together, and it drives BF crazy that I can leave laundry in a basket for a week and not put it away, or that I can deal with a bunch of crap stacked in a corner. As long as it's mostly neat though, he lets it go.

Also, you need to realize as far as "training" goes that your way isn't the only way. If you come at this in a "cleaning will be done my way" fashion, you're going to alienate him.

AprilH81 · May 2013

radleyboo said

Totally! Why does he need a Keurig magazine from February? "I"m going to order some coffee." No, you're not. If you were, you would have already, and you won't because we just buy it at the grocery store. I end up tossing stuff he claims he wants, but he never ends up asking for it. One of the other problems is that he works at a bank, so he has access to a Super Shredder and private disposal service, so he'll collect our 401k, IRAs, insuranc policies, and 529 statements 'to shred' but then they sit there for weeks waiting to go back to the bank to be shredded. I'm trying to go to digital statements for everything, but there's so much of it, I honestly don't have the time! My next step is to put a box by the garage door that says 'Shred' on it so he can just take it to work, but he walks past the piles so I'm guessing he'll walk past the box too.

Oh well, it's a small price to pay, especially compared to my ex! We won't go there, though, unless you want me to. I have stories that would make your head spin....

You will probably have to put the shred box in his car to get him to take it to the office and deal with it. lol

suzie211 · May 2013

I've learned that both are versions of clean mean different things. I can't stand dishes in the sink, but FI thinks he's done an amazing job cleaning up after dinner when he moves the dishes from the table to the sink. I, on the other hand, have the world's most cluttered desk. I know where everything is, but its always full of work papers strewn everywhere. FI can't stand it and comments on it, but is afraid to go near it and "screw up" my organization.

lennonkdc · May 2013

100% what Peek and Suzie said. This transition will be a whole lot smoother if can learn to let go of your idea of clean. I don't mean that you need to totally give up and live like a slob, but if BF says he'll empty the dishwasher, don't nag him if its not done in the next 10 min. Trust that he'll do what he says and let it go, and for the love of god don't lecture him on the 'right' aka your way to dust/vacuum/fold laundry/etc. Be grateful that it was done even if its not how 'you' would have done it.

FI and I have also found that the whole 'chores' list thing doesn't work for us, if it needs done, one of us does it. FI works FT and is in school, he also earns more than I do at the moment, so that means that right now, more of the chores are on my shoulders, when I was studying for the bar exam, he was the one who handled all the chores. Its an evolution and you'll find your comfort zone as a couple, but you've got to realize that it might not line up with where you're personal comfort zone is.

AprilH81 · May 2013

lennonkdc said:

100% what Peek and Suzie said. This transition will be a whole lot smoother if can learn to let go of your idea of clean. I don't mean that you need to totally give up and live like a slob, but if BF says he'll empty the dishwasher, don't nag him if its not done in the next 10 min. Trust that he'll do what he says and let it go, and for the love of god don't lecture him on the 'right' aka your way to dust/vacuum/fold laundry/etc. Be grateful that it was done even if its not how 'you' would have done it.
FI and I have also found that the whole 'chores' list thing doesn't work for us, if it needs done, one of us does it. FI works FT and is in school, he also earns more than I do at the moment, so that means that right now, more of the chores are on my shoulders, when I was studying for the bar exam, he was the one who handled all the chores. Its an evolution and you'll find your comfort zone as a couple, but you've got to realize that it might not line up with where you're personal comfort zone is.

Most of the time I don't care how it gets done as long as it gets done and the end result is a clean/organized/finished result. I don't care how he folds laundry as long as it is folded (but he does fold clothes differently than I do... lol) I don't care in what order he cleans the bathroom as long as it actually gets CLEAN.

Like I said, I am still trying to learn to let some things go and not just do everything myself. I do not want to become his mother with taking full responsibility for the cooking, cleaning, laundry and bills.

NOTE: He has not asked me to do this for him, this is what I am afraid will happen if I just do what I normally do and "take care of it".

He does have lots of good qualities for those who may have doubts about our relationship. We agree on religion, politics and finances. He loves me, he makes me laugh and he will run errands for me if I can't get away from work. He will volunteer to pick up dinner (or cook depending on the night) if he is home earlier than normal. Our only real differences is on how each of us defines "clean".

radleyboo · May 2013

lennonkdc said:

100% what Peek and Suzie said. This transition will be a whole lot smoother if can learn to let go of your idea of clean. I don't mean that you need to totally give up and live like a slob, but if BF says he'll empty the dishwasher, don't nag him if its not done in the next 10 min. Trust that he'll do what he says and let it go, and for the love of god don't lecture him on the 'right' aka your way to dust/vacuum/fold laundry/etc. Be grateful that it was done even if its not how 'you' would have done it.
FI and I have also found that the whole 'chores' list thing doesn't work for us, if it needs done, one of us does it. FI works FT and is in school, he also earns more than I do at the moment, so that means that right now, more of the chores are on my shoulders, when I was studying for the bar exam, he was the one who handled all the chores. Its an evolution and you'll find your comfort zone as a couple, but you've got to realize that it might not line up with where you're personal comfort zone is.

^^ This is sage advice. When company is coming, FI and I are great at dividing and conquering to make the house look great. The rest of the time, we do what we can between work, the 4 kids, the 3 cats, wedding planning, training for races, etc. I like to say that it's highly unlikely the President is stopping by, and this is a house we 'live' in. It's not a nightmare, but it's not perfect, and we're both completely fine with that.

Belle2188 · May 2013

Glad it's going smoothly! Like the others said, there's a good chance you'll never win the cleaning battle, but hey, it's definitely not the worst thing in the world to have to deal with. My personal favorite is when BF "cleans on his own" and is so excited to show me what a good boy he's been...and then I open the closet where he shoved all of his mess and he just hangs his head like a puppy that wet the carpet. You just have to laugh...

lennonkdc · May 2013

AprilH81 said:

lennonkdc said:

100% what Peek and Suzie said. This transition will be a whole lot smoother if can learn to let go of your idea of clean. I don't mean that you need to totally give up and live like a slob, but if BF says he'll empty the dishwasher, don't nag him if its not done in the next 10 min. Trust that he'll do what he says and let it go, and for the love of god don't lecture him on the 'right' aka your way to dust/vacuum/fold laundry/etc. Be grateful that it was done even if its not how 'you' would have done it.
FI and I have also found that the whole 'chores' list thing doesn't work for us, if it needs done, one of us does it. FI works FT and is in school, he also earns more than I do at the moment, so that means that right now, more of the chores are on my shoulders, when I was studying for the bar exam, he was the one who handled all the chores. Its an evolution and you'll find your comfort zone as a couple, but you've got to realize that it might not line up with where you're personal comfort zone is.

Most of the time I don't care how it gets done as long as it gets done and the end result is a clean/organized/finished result. I don't care how he folds laundry as long as it is folded (but he does fold clothes differently than I do... lol) I don't care in what order he cleans the bathroom as long as it actually gets CLEAN.

Like I said, I am still trying to learn to let some things go and not just do everything myself. I do not want to become his mother with taking full responsibility for the cooking, cleaning, laundry and bills.

NOTE: He has not asked me to do this for him, this is what I am afraid will happen if I just do what I normally do and "take care of it".

He does have lots of good qualities for those who may have doubts about our relationship. We agree on religion, politics and finances. He loves me, he makes me laugh and he will run errands for me if I can't get away from work. He will volunteer to pick up dinner (or cook depending on the night) if he is home earlier than normal. Our only real differences is on how each of us defines "clean".

Sorry if I came off as harsh or judgy- It wasn't my intention at all. Learn to live with a SO is hard, esp after having been on your own and I saw a lot of our situation in your comments. It was just sort of preemptive advice from a girl who's been there.

FI has a light to mild clutter tolerance and I am more of a heavy clutter person. Its not that I don't enjoy having a clean house, I just don't see clutter as an issue. We've been working on it for 10 years, and we've found a 'comfort zone'.

I highly recommend Flylady.net, its a great site for helping those who (like me) get overwhelmed with cleaning tasks, and I have self admitted neat freak friends who use it to keep them from going overboard. It takes some getting used to, but once you're 'flying' it feels great!

minskat30 · May 2013

suzie211 said:

I've learned that both are versions of clean mean different things. I can't stand dishes in the sink, but FI thinks he's done an amazing job cleaning up after dinner when he moves the dishes from the table to the sink. I, on the other hand, have the world's most cluttered desk. I know where everything is, but its always full of work papers strewn everywhere. FI can't stand it and comments on it, but is afraid to go near it and "screw up" my organization.

This is just like me...I'm sitting in piles of documents right now but dishes in my sink?! The horror.

AprilH81 · May 2013

lennonkdc said:

Sorry if I came off as harsh or judgy- It wasn't my intention at all. Learn to live with a SO is hard, esp after having been on your own and I saw a lot of our situation in your comments. It was just sort of preemptive advice from a girl who's been there.

FI has a light to mild clutter tolerance and I am more of a heavy clutter person. Its not that I don't enjoy having a clean house, I just don't see clutter as an issue. We've been working on it for 10 years, and we've found a 'comfort zone'.

I highly recommend Flylady.net, its a great site for helping those who (like me) get overwhelmed with cleaning tasks, and I have self admitted neat freak friends who use it to keep them from going overboard. It takes some getting used to, but once you're 'flying' it feels great!

No worries, I didn't think you were being judgmental. I just wanted to add some clarification (hopefully) to our situation. So far it has been a pretty easy adjustment, but this weekend will be a good test. We will both be home for the majority of the weekend and we will have chores to do. Hopefully we can come to an agreement on who does what.

CLoGreenEyes · May 2013

Glad things seem to be going well so far, April, and congrats on your BF moving in! Good luck with the trail-o'-stuff. That may never go away, but Stiches' (I think it was Stitches') thought about picking out something for him to keep his stuff on/in together was awesome - maybe that will help? Otherwise, it sounds like there are enough good things that it's not a tragedy if his stuff ends up everywhere.

BF's quirks are leaving water glasses everywhere and leaving cabinets and drawers open instead of closing them. I just smile and pick them up/close them behind him. If I feel myself getting genuinely annoyed, I just count until I remember that it's just not a big deal. He counts too at my quirks, and we are not afraid to do it out loud. It is always done in good fun, not ever to nag each other, and it's a good reminder for each of us to try and respect the other's preferences, even though we will always fall back into our old habits sometimes.

leia1979 · May 2013

Lennon is so right. It took me a long time to let go of H's dish washing habits (i.e. letting them sit on the counter for a week first). I'm not the cleanest person in the world (also a pile-r), but I definitely have different ideas about dishes than he does. But it probably isn't going to change.

There's definitely an adjustment period. I still maintain the first month of living together was the hardest part of our relationship. Good luck! Patience is key.

s-aries8990 · May 2013

I'm taking all of this advice in

BF and I hope to move in together by year's end, but I've made it a point to tell him NOW what irks me. He lives in the in-law apartment at his parents is used to living with massive amounts of clutter and a mix of clean and dirty clothes on the floor in his bedroom, his hallway, his bathroom and even his living room AND the spare bedroom. And because the floors are covered with clothing, they're never vacuumed (maybe like 1x/year).

I've freaked out on him a few times because I could barely walk sometimes and told him I couldn't live with him if he can't take care of his own place - he's definitely putting in an effort, folding his laundry, wiping down the bathroom sink and shower enough so it's not discussing, and tidying the kitchen.

Congrats April on such a smooth-ish transition!

kmbryant2413 · May 2013

sydaries said:

I'm taking all of this advice in BF and I hope to move in together by year's end, but I've made it a point to tell him NOW what irks me. He lives in the in-law apartment at his parents is used to living with massive amounts of clutter and a mix of clean and dirty clothes on the floor in his bedroom, his hallway, his bathroom and even his living room AND the spare bedroom. And because the floors are covered with clothing, they're never vacuumed (maybe like 1x/year).

I've freaked out on him a few times because I could barely walk sometimes and told him I couldn't live with him if he can't take care of his own place - he's definitely putting in an effort, folding his laundry, wiping down the bathroom sink and shower enough so it's not discussing, and tidying the kitchen.

Congrats April on such a smooth-ish transition!

Syd, my ex was like that. It was really bad, even after we got married (we lived together before we ever started dating, so I should have freakin' known!) In the great, grand scheme of things it was definitely not the end-all, but it did really bother me. He never got better about it and it was one of the many things I freaked out on him for a long time.

That's great to hear that your BF is putting in the effort. It's hard, when you live by yourself, to change your habits and to 'see' things like that, as PPs' have said. Makes my heart fuzzy to hear that he's working on it

s-aries8990 · May 2013

It makes me fuzzy too sometimes. He'll get like a little kid and say "look what I did!" lol And he's the one pushing to move in together, so I'm trying to set an expectation early. I don't mind clutter, that's fine, but I need SOME order like:
-clean clothes should be folded (neatly is a plus, but an attempt is better than a ball) and not on the floor, preferably in a basket or away where they belong.
- dirty clothes should be kept to one section of a room, not sprawled in a bread cumb trail day after day (all you need to do is kick it into a pile!
- dirty from last week glasses should at least be in the sink
-I shouldn't fear touching the bathroom counter because of all of the hair from shaving and toothpaste smeared everywhere.
- I shouldn't accidentally step on a clock and shatter the face because it's covered with clothes (that happened... I wasn't happy).

The list looks bad, but it's really just some basic things I need to not feel like I'm on "Hoarding: buried alive!"

AprilH81 · May 2013

sydaries said:

It makes me fuzzy too sometimes. He'll get like a little kid and say "look what I did!" lol And he's the one pushing to move in together, so I'm trying to set an expectation early. I don't mind clutter, that's fine, but I need SOME order like:
-clean clothes should be folded (neatly is a plus, but an attempt is better than a ball) and not on the floor, preferably in a basket or away where they belong.
- dirty clothes should be kept to one section of a room, not sprawled in a bread cumb trail day after day (all you need to do is kick it into a pile!
- dirty from last week glasses should at least be in the sink
-I shouldn't fear touching the bathroom counter because of all of the hair from shaving and toothpaste smeared everywhere.
- I shouldn't accidentally step on a clock and shatter the face because it's covered with clothes (that happened... I wasn't happy).

The list looks bad, but it's really just some basic things I need to not feel like I'm on "Hoarding: buried alive!"

You pretty much described my BF except he didn't leave dirty clothes everywhere, they were in a big pile. When the clean clothes were emptied from the laundry basket the dirty clothes got put there. Otherwise.. Yup... That's my BF. lol

s-aries8990 · May 2013

AprilH81 said:

sydaries said:

It makes me fuzzy too sometimes. He'll get like a little kid and say "look what I did!" lol And he's the one pushing to move in together, so I'm trying to set an expectation early. I don't mind clutter, that's fine, but I need SOME order like:
-clean clothes should be folded (neatly is a plus, but an attempt is better than a ball) and not on the floor, preferably in a basket or away where they belong.
- dirty clothes should be kept to one section of a room, not sprawled in a bread cumb trail day after day (all you need to do is kick it into a pile!
- dirty from last week glasses should at least be in the sink
-I shouldn't fear touching the bathroom counter because of all of the hair from shaving and toothpaste smeared everywhere.
- I shouldn't accidentally step on a clock and shatter the face because it's covered with clothes (that happened... I wasn't happy).

The list looks bad, but it's really just some basic things I need to not feel like I'm on "Hoarding: buried alive!"

You pretty much described my BF except he didn't leave dirty clothes everywhere, they were in a big pile. When the clean clothes were emptied from the laundry basket the dirty clothes got put there. Otherwise.. Yup... That's my BF. lol

lol I think mine has a similar "blindness" to somethings - he doesn't "see" the dirt, etc.

It has been almost a week...

Re: It has been almost a week...

Choose Another Board

Search Boards