Pre-wedding Parties

Hosting a Couples Shower and only one couple has RSVP'd

I am a bridesmaid in a friend's wedding and offered to host a couples shower for her. We selected the date together, and the invitations went out a month in advance. I have had one couple RSVP. I was only given mailing addresses for all the guest, and have been told there is a retirement party taking place that over half the guest list will be attending. I said RSVP by 25th, the shower is on the 1st. At this point if the party were to take place it would just be 6 people, 2 of which are the host couple, and 2 who are the guests of honor.  At what point do I call it? Can I cancel the shower? Should I tell the bride I will just spend the money for the shower on a really nice wedding gift? Should I just call the couple that RSVP'd? Help!!! 

Re: Hosting a Couples Shower and only one couple has RSVP'd

  • itzMSitzMS member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers First Anniversary

    That's a pretty tight deadline. Normally, we advise people to wait until about a week after the RSVP date. Unfortunately, you don't really have that luxury. I think the first step is to be honest and let the bride know of the poor RSVP rate. Get with her right away and make some phone calls.

    If it were me, I'd say cancelling the shower is the best option. As a bride, I'd be more embarassed that no one came versus saying it is being cancelled due to a scheduling conflict (or whatever reason you want to use).

    You could offer to take her and FI out to lunch or dinner that day. Perhaps invite the other couple who is available, too, when you give them a call about the shower.

    I wouldn't make any mention of you spending more money on a gift for her as a consolation.

  • Get contact numbers from the bride.  If you do not get RSVPs by Monday start calling and if the date just conflicts, let the bride know and I would probably cancel it or try to reschedule if that is an option? Agree that I would be embarrassed if only one couple + the host showed up.  I like PPs suggestion to just do a triple date or something instead. 

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