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Divorced, sort of live together, same last name - how to address invite?

beason641beason641
First Comment
in Wedding Etiquette Forum
Here's a weird one:  My grandparents are divorced but have lived together for almost 40 years post-divorce.  My grandmother technically has her own apartment, but she has a bedroom at my grandfathers house and my parents say to just send one invite for both of them to his house.  They do everything together (and we suspect they might be boning but we aren't asking because, you know, grandparents, gross), so how should I address this invitation?
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Re: Divorced, sort of live together, same last name - how to address invite?

  • HockeyFan4HockeyFan4 member
    1000 Comments Third Anniversary Combo Breaker
    i would do separate invites sent to their residences.  If grandma is staying at grandpa's most of the time and getting her mail there, then send her own invite there.
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  • jessicabessicajessicabessica member
    2500 Comments Third Anniversary 100 Love Its Name Dropper
    If they do everything together, including going to social events, and appear to be a couple, I would invite them together.  
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  • LoopysevenLoopyseven member
    5000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 5 Love Its
    Since it sounds like THEY don't acknowledge their relationship, I'd send separate invites.  Send hers to wherever she gets her regular mail.
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  • MyNameIsNotMyNameIsNot member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    I would defer to my parents on this one.  If they think it is best to send one, I'd send one.

    I had a similar (opposite) situation with my H's grandparents.  They are still married, but haven't stayed in the same place in 40 years.  They don't even live in the same country.  I defered to MIL's opinion, because they are her parents, and she knows what they would prefer.
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  • tenofcups4metenofcups4me member
    2500 Comments 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    I'd also defer to your parents. They certainly know your grandparents and what they would finad acceptable better than any of us could.
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  • myname1234myname1234
    500 Comments
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_divorced-sort-of-live-together-same-last-name-how-to-address-invite?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:a18efb3f-4e6f-4f36-bf4c-4cbf8a8db3acPost:315efbdb-e622-4017-9621-55ea41c68ac2">Re: Divorced, sort of live together, same last name - how to address invite?</a>:
    [QUOTE]Since it sounds like THEY don't acknowledge their relationship, I'd send separate invites.  Send hers to wherever she gets her regular mail.
    Posted by Loopyseven[/QUOTE]

    this!
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  • FelicityD927FelicityD927 member
    First Comment
    If they have two separate mailing addresses, then send them each their own. I think that solves things quite simply.
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  • JennaV26JennaV26
    1000 Comments
    I had a similar situation with one of my MIL's friends. One of her best friends is divorced but still lives with her ex husband and they share the same last name. My MIL insisted I send the invitation to "Mr & Mrs. Last Name." Not sure if this was accurate but I couldn't come up with the answer myself. 
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