Trashy Wedding Stories

maratea · March 2011

Share your trashy wedding stories- whether it's something you did at a wedding, something about a wedding you've been to, or even your own wedding! Let's get daytime talk show up in here!

Faaiza · December 2012

1. Wedding was at noon, reception wasn't till like 5pm......wedding party was made to ride in limo all day drinking alcohol, and no food. 2. Stretched limo for wedding party....the only thing in the entire wedding and reception where you can tell money was spent. 3. Bride had "skunky" highlights 4.Bride made bridesmaids carry fake flowers, but hers were real. 5. Bride made bridesmaids wear heavy, dark purple, floor length satin for a July wedding in the South....we were sweating like pigs. 6. Bride and Groom drinking heavily witk a cig always hanging out their mouths. 7. Buffet style food....with fish sitting out in the July heat, stinking. 8. Cake leaning over about to fall....which was made by a friend of the bride. 9. Groom's cake was bear that looked like a child's bday cake...and it was melting. 10. No wedding decor....just the hotel's white table cloths, typical folding chairs, and little candle in the middle that was provided. 11. Groom stuck his head and practically his whole body up bride's dress to pull off the garter.....and did it with his teeth. 12. Wedding guest favors were cookies of the couple's initial made by the groom's mother and they weren't the consistent obvously homemade looking....and they were falling apart. 13. Bridesmaids gift from the bride were dollar store bath and body products. And the funny thing is, this is all just the wedding day!!!! The before wedding BS was just as hideous. 1. Bride, another girl, and I were all getting married that same year and in each others weddings....she was getting married first. She told me one evening that she was only going to put as much money in mine and my other frend's wedding as we spend on hers. 2. Kept threatening we "better" be throwing her a bachelorette party. 3. Got mad when a few girls left her bachelorette party when they got tired. 4. Kicked one of the bridemaids out of the wedding cause she didn't spend the night after the bachelorette party.....later asked her to rejoin her wedding party. 5. Wanted wedding party to spend the night at hotel she stayed at night before the wedding....but expected them to pay. 6. Rehersal dinner consisted of party sub from Subway. Oh man, I could go on and on....hahaha, but you get the point.

[Deleted User] · June 2013

The user and all related content has been deleted.

AJuliaNJ · June 2013

I love how there's at least 6 months between each of the posts. OP saw crickets when she posted in 2011.

[Deleted User] · June 2013

The user and all related content has been deleted.

QueerFemme · June 2013

dillfin said:

OMG!!! That's Awful!
I was BM in a wedding- It was such a WhiteTrash wedding,
1. we had these UGLY orange fake daisy pomanders as our flowers while the bride had a real bouquet, and Fake flowers in all of our hair
2.dates were not allowed at the rehearsal dinner even thought I offered to pay for his meal- I was not going to leave him by himself in the hotel when it was his first time to that city (11 hrs away from home!) (Cheep pasta place would have been $15 including a beer),
3.Cash Bar,
4 Flower girl was some 10 year old midget that the bride had met a month before - oh but she's cute! No shes not, why is she here?!?!
5. there were bag-pipes -Bride not Scottish or in the military,
6. BM gift was a cheap champagne flute with BM written on it -it fell over 1/2 thru the night and broke!!!
7. our dresses were badly hand made by some 'family friend' of the bride, seam right down the front, bra straps showing under the 1.5 inch straps (even after I taped and safety pined the hell out of them!)
8. the food was awful and I hate buffets,
9. Bride's dress was a FULL size too big (even after alterations) and her boobs didn't fit in it- she had none in the pictures- Oh I don't want to wear a bra...
10, the colours were Orange and blue-tealish
11, The MoH was a HUGE WHALE- with the personality to match!!!!!!! (Nothing against big girls, even if she was a skinny B I would still call her a whale she was just one of 'those'),
12, they had a sand ceremony { nothing against the SC, they can work} but it was dreadful red and light blue sand didn't look good at all, and the containers didn't fill it up even 1/3 of the way "oh we have more at home, we'll finish it then".
13, The BM's all had to have matching shoes-flats- most unconfortable shoes ever! (I changed into my 4.5 inch heels for the reception thats how bad they were!)
14. The Groom NEVER proposed, she just started planning and told him to show up!
15. The wedding bands were free off some website -Tungsten Carbide- uggggly
That whole Circus... Ahm, 'wedding' was everything me and my guy DON'T want, and even stuff we didn't even know we didn't want haha!!

Most of your post makes you sound like a huge jerk. But, in particular, the highlighted ones. Snark is one thing. I'm all for it. Your post isn't snarky, it's just assholeish.

Weezy56 · June 2013

dillfin said:
OMG!!! That's Awful!
I was BM in a wedding- It was such a WhiteTrash wedding,
1. we had these UGLY orange fake daisy pomanders as our flowers while the bride had a real bouquet, and Fake flowers in all of our hair
2.dates were not allowed at the rehearsal dinner even thought I offered to pay for his meal- I was not going to leave him by himself in the hotel when it was his first time to that city (11 hrs away from home!) (Cheep pasta place would have been $15 including a beer),
3.Cash Bar,
4 Flower girl was some 10 year old midget that the bride had met a month before - oh but she's cute! No shes not, why is she here?!?!
5. there were bag-pipes -Bride not Scottish or in the military,
6. BM gift was a cheap champagne flute with BM written on it -it fell over 1/2 thru the night and broke!!!
7. our dresses were badly hand made by some 'family friend' of the bride, seam right down the front, bra straps showing under the 1.5 inch straps (even after I taped and safety pined the hell out of them!)
8. the food was awful and I hate buffets,
9. Bride's dress was a FULL size too big (even after alterations) and her boobs didn't fit in it- she had none in the pictures- Oh I don't want to wear a bra...
10, the colours were Orange and blue-tealish
11, The MoH was a HUGE WHALE- with the personality to match!!!!!!! (Nothing against big girls, even if she was a skinny B I would still call her a whale she was just one of 'those'),
12, they had a sand ceremony { nothing against the SC, they can work} but it was dreadful red and light blue sand didn't look good at all, and the containers didn't fill it up even 1/3 of the way "oh we have more at home, we'll finish it then".
13, The BM's all had to have matching shoes-flats- most unconfortable shoes ever! (I changed into my 4.5 inch heels for the reception thats how bad they were!)
14. The Groom NEVER proposed, she just started planning and told him to show up!
15. The wedding bands were free off some website -Tungsten Carbide- uggggly
That whole Circus... Ahm, 'wedding' was everything me and my guy DON'T want, and even stuff we didn't even know we didn't want haha!!

I don't understand how someone's weight can make them trashy. Please explain? I'm curious.

TKzilla · June 2013

Weezy56 said:

I don't understand how someone's weight can make them trashy. Please explain? I'm curious.

It can't, but having a terrible judgey attitude can make someone a lousy person.

AddieCake · June 2013

How are people finding threads to resurrect that are 2+ years old? Using search?

And @dillfin, I hope your wedding turns out beautiful b/c you need it to balance what an ugly person you appear to be on the inside.

southernbelle0915 · June 2013

dillfin said:

OMG!!! That's Awful!
I was BM in a wedding- It was such a WhiteTrash this term makes me stabby wedding,
1. we had these UGLY orange fake daisy pomanders as our flowers while the bride had a real bouquet, and Fake flowers in all of our hair
2.dates were not allowed at the rehearsal dinner even thought I offered to pay for his meal- I was not going to leave him by himself in the hotel when it was his first time to that city (11 hrs away from home!) (Cheep pasta place would have been $15 including a beer),
3.Cash Bar,
4 Flower girl was some 10 year old midget that the bride had met a month before - oh but she's cute! No shes not, why is she here?!?! I'm willing to bet people thought the same thing about you
5. there were bag-pipes -Bride not Scottish or in the military, and the groom? also, so what? are bag pipes trashy?
6. BM gift was a cheap champagne flute with BM written on it -it fell over 1/2 thru the night and broke!!! a champagne flute falling over and breaking is trashy how?
7. our dresses were badly hand made by some 'family friend' of the bride, seam right down the front, bra straps showing under the 1.5 inch straps (even after I taped and safety pined the hell out of them!) this could have said, "our dresses were free - it was really sweet of her to organize this for us in addition to gifting us the champagne flute. I was an idiot and didn't wear a strapless bra so my bra straps were hanging out for everyone to see probably made me look so trashy! omgggg!"
8. the food was awful and I hate buffets, nothing trashy about a buffet
9. Bride's dress was a FULL size too big (even after alterations) and her boobs didn't fit in it- she had none in the pictures- Oh I don't want to wear a bra... bra straps in a taped and safety pinned mess sounds a lot trashier than having a flat chest....
10, the colours were Orange and blue-tealish OMGGGGGG are you serious??? orange and tealish? you should have left. how trashy!! I can't believe she had the nerve.
11, The MoH was a HUGE WHALE- with the personality to match!!!!!!! (Nothing against big girls, even if she was a skinny B I would still call her a whale she was just one of 'those'), I'm guessing you have some body image issues that have manifested themselves in making fun of other people to cover up your horribly ugly personality.
12, they had a sand ceremony { nothing against the SC, they can work} but it was dreadful red and light blue sand didn't look good at all, and the containers didn't fill it up even 1/3 of the way "oh we have more at home, we'll finish it then". your point....?
13, The BM's all had to have matching shoes-flats- most unconfortable shoes ever! (I changed into my 4.5 inch heels for the reception thats how bad they were!) I never thought of flats being trashier than 4.5" heels...I need to get out more..
14. The Groom NEVER proposed, she just started planning and told him to show up! That's just odd.. but not trashy per se
15. The wedding bands were free off some website -Tungsten Carbide- uggggly FI is looking at tungsten carbide because he likes the grey/matte look more than white gold. I'm going to have to tell him it's trashy and ugly and not to buy it because some judgy pants in 4.5" heels with bra straps hanging out and talking shit about people's physical appearances and trashy bag pipes might not like it.
That whole Circus... Ahm, 'wedding' was everything me and my guy DON'T want, and even stuff we didn't even know we didn't want haha!! nothing puts icing on the trashy cake like bad grammar....

ETA: awaiting my first flag.... bring it.

Peledreamsofrain · June 2013

Lol! So not only did you dig up a two year old thread that is no longer relevant, you did it to say some of the most offensive things you could think of?

TKzilla · June 2013

My husband loves his tungsten carbide wedding band. It goes very well with his titanium watch. Boy is HE going to be disappointed when I tell him that his most sacred possession is trashy.

jarednmegan · June 2013

dillfin said:

OMG!!! That's Awful!
I was BM in a wedding- It was such a WhiteTrash wedding,
1. we had these UGLY orange fake daisy pomanders as our flowers while the bride had a real bouquet, and Fake flowers in all of our hair
2.dates were not allowed at the rehearsal dinner even thought I offered to pay for his meal- I was not going to leave him by himself in the hotel when it was his first time to that city (11 hrs away from home!) (Cheep pasta place would have been $15 including a beer),
3.Cash Bar, I guess FI and I are trashy then...
4 Flower girl was some 10 year old midget that the bride had met a month before - oh but she's cute! No shes not, why is she here?!?! Wow, hateful much?!
5. there were bag-pipes -Bride not Scottish or in the military,
6. BM gift was a cheap champagne flute with BM written on it -it fell over 1/2 thru the night and broke!!! Wow, you're a real peach.
7. our dresses were badly hand made by some 'family friend' of the bride, seam right down the front, bra straps showing under the 1.5 inch straps (even after I taped and safety pined the hell out of them!)
8. the food was awful and I hate buffets, Shame on them for not seeking your input.
9. Bride's dress was a FULL size too big (even after alterations) and her boobs didn't fit in it- she had none in the pictures- Oh I don't want to wear a bra...
10, the colours were Orange and blue-tealish
11, The MoH was a HUGE WHALE- with the personality to match!!!!!!! (Nothing against big girls, even if she was a skinny B I would still call her a whale she was just one of 'those'), Again, hateful.
12, they had a sand ceremony { nothing against the SC, they can work} but it was dreadful red and light blue sand didn't look good at all, and the containers didn't fill it up even 1/3 of the way "oh we have more at home, we'll finish it then".
13, The BM's all had to have matching shoes-flats- most unconfortable shoes ever! (I changed into my 4.5 inch heels for the reception thats how bad they were!) Are you sure you don't have this flipped around? Do you have Barbie feet or something?
14. The Groom NEVER proposed, she just started planning and told him to show up!
15. The wedding bands were free off some website -Tungsten Carbide- uggggly
That whole Circus... Ahm, 'wedding' was everything me and my guy DON'T want, and even stuff we didn't even know we didn't want haha!!

I'm sure your wedding will look like something out of a magazine.

southernbelle0915 · June 2013

@jarednmegan...I don't know about the Barbie feet, but this is what she posted on Luxury Weddings about her shoes:

dillfin said:
I'm getting the Fifi Straus Louboutin Multi Colour, They are going to be my something blue- even though they aren't completely blue! I just love the look of the red sole, I couldn't imagine not wearing them!

jarednmegan · June 2013

southernbelle0915 said:

@jarednmegan...I don't know about the Barbie feet, but this is what she posted on Luxury Weddings about her shoes:
dillfin said:
I'm getting the Fifi Straus Louboutin Multi Colour, They are going to be my something blue- even though they aren't completely blue! I just love the look of the red sole, I couldn't imagine not wearing them!

Oh, she posted that in Luxury Weddings?! This explains why the wedding referenced in this thread was "trashy"...because those "uncomfortable" flats didn't cost three or four figures.

I wouldn't buy shoes that looked like that if they were for sale in a thrift store...JS.

southernbelle0915 · June 2013

@jarednmegan - well she also posted one year ago that she was still a student and wasn't engaged yet because she couldn't afford a nice wedding.... I'm guessing these shoes are in sugar plum fairy land for her. And if not, nothing screams nouveau riche like "OMG LOOK AT MY SHOES!!! they were really expensive" and then not even spelling the designer's name right.

ETA @LingerLonger - ditto on the ugly. I even might go so far as to dare say..... trashy. They look like a DIY project from a first grader's birthday party.

TKzilla · June 2013

LingerLonger1 said:

southernbelle0915 said:

@jarednmegan...I don't know about the Barbie feet, but this is what she posted on Luxury Weddings about her shoes:
dillfin said:
I'm getting the Fifi Straus Louboutin Multi Colour, They are going to be my something blue- even though they aren't completely blue! I just love the look of the red sole, I couldn't imagine not wearing them!

Those are the second ugliest shoes I've seen on the knot. They're probably more expensive than the first ugliest shoes I've seen here though. I guess that's all that matters?

Now I'm dying to know what the first ugliest shoes looked like!

jarednmegan · June 2013

southernbelle0915 said:

@jarednmegan - well she also posted one year ago that she was still a student and wasn't engaged yet because she couldn't afford a nice wedding.... I'm guessing these shoes are in sugar plum fairy land for her. And if not, nothing screams nouveau riche like "OMG LOOK AT MY SHOES!!! they were really expensive" and then not even spelling the designer's name right.

...a diva who can't spell.

jarednmegan · June 2013

Now I'm dying to know what the first ugliest shoes looked like!

Me too...

TKzilla · June 2013

LingerLonger1 said:

I can't find the shoes themselves but picture this with multicolored (pink and blue were in there for sure. I think green might have been as well) zebra stripes instead of black and white:

What the everloving fuck.

southernbelle0915 · June 2013

LingerLonger1 said:

I can't find the shoes themselves but picture this with multicolored (pink and blue were in there for sure. I think green might have been as well) zebra stripes instead of black and white:

Was the bride planning on putting on her own garter toss show?

Peledreamsofrain · June 2013

Post removed due to GBCK

jarednmegan · June 2013

LingerLonger1 said:

southernbelle0915 said:

LingerLonger1 said:

I can't find the shoes themselves but picture this with multicolored (pink and blue were in there for sure. I think green might have been as well) zebra stripes instead of black and white:

Was the bride planning on putting on her own garter toss show?

Ha no! She totally loved them. They were just so her style and someone as unfashionable as me could never hope to understand. She then DDed the pic

Hot. Mess.

southernbelle0915 · June 2013

LingerLonger1 said:

southernbelle0915 said:

LingerLonger1 said:

I can't find the shoes themselves but picture this with multicolored (pink and blue were in there for sure. I think green might have been as well) zebra stripes instead of black and white:

Was the bride planning on putting on her own garter toss show?

Ha no! She totally loved them. They were just so her style and someone as unfashionable as me could never hope to understand. She then DDed the pic

Hooker...

[Deleted User] · June 2013

The user and all related content has been deleted.

Peledreamsofrain · June 2013

Post removed due to GBCK

relliotts · June 2013

StageManager14 said:

OMG!!! That's Awful!
I was BM in a wedding- It was such a WhiteTrash wedding,
1. we had these UGLY orange fake daisy pomanders as our flowers while the bride had a real bouquet, and Fake flowers in all of our hair
2.dates were not allowed at the rehearsal dinner even thought I offered to pay for his meal- I was not going to leave him by himself in the hotel when it was his first time to that city (11 hrs away from home!) (Cheep pasta place would have been $15 including a beer),
3.Cash Bar,
4 Flower girl was some 10 year old midget that the bride had met a month before - oh but she's cute! No shes not, why is she here?!?!
5. there were bag-pipes -Bride not Scottish or in the military,
6. BM gift was a cheap champagne flute with BM written on it -it fell over 1/2 thru the night and broke!!!
7. our dresses were badly hand made by some 'family friend' of the bride, seam right down the front, bra straps showing under the 1.5 inch straps (even after I taped and safety pined the hell out of them!)
8. the food was awful and I hate buffets,
9. Bride's dress was a FULL size too big (even after alterations) and her boobs didn't fit in it- she had none in the pictures- Oh I don't want to wear a bra...
10, the colours were Orange and blue-tealish
11, The MoH was a HUGE WHALE- with the personality to match!!!!!!! (Nothing against big girls, even if she was a skinny B I would still call her a whale she was just one of 'those'),
12, they had a sand ceremony { nothing against the SC, they can work} but it was dreadful red and light blue sand didn't look good at all, and the containers didn't fill it up even 1/3 of the way "oh we have more at home, we'll finish it then".
13, The BM's all had to have matching shoes-flats- most unconfortable shoes ever! (I changed into my 4.5 inch heels for the reception thats how bad they were!)
14. The Groom NEVER proposed, she just started planning and told him to show up!
15. The wedding bands were free off some website -Tungsten Carbide- uggggly
That whole Circus... Ahm, 'wedding' was everything me and my guy DON'T want, and even stuff we didn't even know we didn't want haha!!
Tomorrow's post: Trashy TK posts.

I know I'm a little late to the party, but just wanted to point out a couple things to the OP:

I'm a seamstress. Custom, hand made dresses take a very long time to make. They are not easy. Those awful hand made dresses that you hated? They took a minimum of 15 - 20 hours EACH to make, and that is not including any alterations or custom fitting work. Each one of those hours involves tedious, laborious, detail oriented work. Someone was either a) paid to do that work, or b) did it as a labor of love for the bride. Either way, it wasn't cheap or easy. Being homemade does not make something trashy, and implying that it does is offensive. If there was a seam down the middle of the dress, that was a design element included in the dress pattern. Again, doesn't make the dress trashy.

I can't wear heels due to back and hip problems. I wear flats because I don't want to become disabled due to my fashion choices. Apparently this makes me trashy.

Regarding the tungsten carbide rings, if SO and I ever get married, this is most likely what he will have. Why? Because he has allergies so severe to certain metal alloys that it affects his whole body when he comes in contact with most jewelry. He physically can't wear most jewelry because of the metal. Tungsten is the only thing he has found that might work, and even then we're not sure. He's not being trashy - he's addressing a legitimate health concern.

I'm not even going to address the rest of it, because others already have. I will say in closing that your friend's wedding sounds just fine; you, however, sound trashy.

manateehugger · June 2013

Yeah, pretty sure I'd think you were trashy for calling a woman a whale and trashy no matter the context.

[Deleted User] · June 2013

jarednmegan said:

dillfin said:

OMG!!! That's Awful!
I was BM in a wedding- It was such a WhiteTrash wedding,
1. we had these UGLY orange fake daisy pomanders as our flowers while the bride had a real bouquet, and Fake flowers in all of our hair
2.dates were not allowed at the rehearsal dinner even thought I offered to pay for his meal- I was not going to leave him by himself in the hotel when it was his first time to that city (11 hrs away from home!) (Cheep pasta place would have been $15 including a beer),
3.Cash Bar, I guess FI and I are trashy then...
4 Flower girl was some 10 year old midget that the bride had met a month before - oh but she's cute! No shes not, why is she here?!?! Wow, hateful much?!
5. there were bag-pipes -Bride not Scottish or in the military,
6. BM gift was a cheap champagne flute with BM written on it -it fell over 1/2 thru the night and broke!!! Wow, you're a real peach.
7. our dresses were badly hand made by some 'family friend' of the bride, seam right down the front, bra straps showing under the 1.5 inch straps (even after I taped and safety pined the hell out of them!)
8. the food was awful and I hate buffets, Shame on them for not seeking your input.
9. Bride's dress was a FULL size too big (even after alterations) and her boobs didn't fit in it- she had none in the pictures- Oh I don't want to wear a bra...
10, the colours were Orange and blue-tealish
11, The MoH was a HUGE WHALE- with the personality to match!!!!!!! (Nothing against big girls, even if she was a skinny B I would still call her a whale she was just one of 'those'), Again, hateful.
12, they had a sand ceremony { nothing against the SC, they can work} but it was dreadful red and light blue sand didn't look good at all, and the containers didn't fill it up even 1/3 of the way "oh we have more at home, we'll finish it then".
13, The BM's all had to have matching shoes-flats- most unconfortable shoes ever! (I changed into my 4.5 inch heels for the reception thats how bad they were!) Are you sure you don't have this flipped around? Do you have Barbie feet or something?
14. The Groom NEVER proposed, she just started planning and told him to show up!
15. The wedding bands were free off some website -Tungsten Carbide- uggggly
That whole Circus... Ahm, 'wedding' was everything me and my guy DON'T want, and even stuff we didn't even know we didn't want haha!!

I'm sure your wedding will look like something out of a magazine.

jarednmegan · June 2013

lplions said:

jarednmegan said:

dillfin said:

OMG!!! That's Awful!
I was BM in a wedding- It was such a WhiteTrash wedding,
1. we had these UGLY orange fake daisy pomanders as our flowers while the bride had a real bouquet, and Fake flowers in all of our hair
2.dates were not allowed at the rehearsal dinner even thought I offered to pay for his meal- I was not going to leave him by himself in the hotel when it was his first time to that city (11 hrs away from home!) (Cheep pasta place would have been $15 including a beer),
3.Cash Bar, I guess FI and I are trashy then...
4 Flower girl was some 10 year old midget that the bride had met a month before - oh but she's cute! No shes not, why is she here?!?! Wow, hateful much?!
5. there were bag-pipes -Bride not Scottish or in the military,
6. BM gift was a cheap champagne flute with BM written on it -it fell over 1/2 thru the night and broke!!! Wow, you're a real peach.
7. our dresses were badly hand made by some 'family friend' of the bride, seam right down the front, bra straps showing under the 1.5 inch straps (even after I taped and safety pined the hell out of them!)
8. the food was awful and I hate buffets, Shame on them for not seeking your input.
9. Bride's dress was a FULL size too big (even after alterations) and her boobs didn't fit in it- she had none in the pictures- Oh I don't want to wear a bra...
10, the colours were Orange and blue-tealish
11, The MoH was a HUGE WHALE- with the personality to match!!!!!!! (Nothing against big girls, even if she was a skinny B I would still call her a whale she was just one of 'those'), Again, hateful.
12, they had a sand ceremony { nothing against the SC, they can work} but it was dreadful red and light blue sand didn't look good at all, and the containers didn't fill it up even 1/3 of the way "oh we have more at home, we'll finish it then".
13, The BM's all had to have matching shoes-flats- most unconfortable shoes ever! (I changed into my 4.5 inch heels for the reception thats how bad they were!) Are you sure you don't have this flipped around? Do you have Barbie feet or something?
14. The Groom NEVER proposed, she just started planning and told him to show up!
15. The wedding bands were free off some website -Tungsten Carbide- uggggly
That whole Circus... Ahm, 'wedding' was everything me and my guy DON'T want, and even stuff we didn't even know we didn't want haha!!

I'm sure your wedding will look like something out of a magazine.

...really? You're the first person I know of who says "it should never happen."

manateehugger · June 2013

Let me be the second then. Cash bars are never ok.

It's very tacky to make guests pay for part of your wedding. Only host the alcohol you can afford. Of that's no alcohol or only beer and wine, that's totally fine.

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