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ideas

michelleseanmichellesean
100 Comments First Anniversary
in Wedding Etiquette Forum
We are trying to figure out what to do. FI dad is having surgery a week before our wedding and wont be able to travel (our wedding is where we live in L.A. and his dad lives in Boston). We have already stressed that the most important thing is for him to recover and of course we will miss him but we are planning on visiting botson in August and can go to dinner with him or have a bbq or something because a lot of FI family can't come. Note: this is not a second reception, I will not be wearing white or doing a first dance or wedding cake or anything of the sort and we are definitely not expecting gifts, just want to have a family get together with everyone. So myquestion is what can we do to make his dad feel included even though he is across the country? He does not have a laptop or comp. So he can't skype.

Tia!!
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Re: ideas

  • southernbelle0915southernbelle0915 mod
    Moderator 10000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary
    Hire a videographer and send him the video. I think it sounds like you're doing all you can and big ups for skipping the PPD!!
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  • gailpetegailpete member
    Knottie Warrior 1000 Comments 25 Love Its Name Dropper
    Is there a friend or family member with a laptop that could set it up so he could Skype?  Could you but him a smartphone or tablet that he could Skype with?

    Other than that, send him a plant, balloons or edible arrangement (whatever he would prefer) on your wedding day with a note that you miss him and know is there in spirit, if not physically.

    Post pictures to Facebook or email them to someone that can be with him and show him the photos as the day goes on.

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  • manateehuggermanateehugger member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 5 Answers
    Agreed with the above suggestions. You could also ask your dad if he'd be willing to do a letter exchange with you so that you could both read each others' words on the wedding day.
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  • michelleseanmichellesean
    100 Comments First Anniversary
    These are great suggestions. I think we will have to send him flowers and balloons. Can't afford to buy him a smartphone or tablet and the rest of the fam is coming to the wedding. Its FI's dad. Hes been in the hospital for a while. We thought he was better last month and everyone kind of breathed a sigh of relief. But he was just admitted last week. We were hoping that if he had the surgery right away he could still make it, but they have to wait a couple weeks. He's so disappointed and FI is too. They both know he should be there but everyone also knows his health is more important and we'd rather him feel 100% then try and make our wedding. Thanks again!
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  • manateehuggermanateehugger member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 5 Answers
    Good for you guys for realizing life is much bigger than your wedding. You'd also be surprised how much a simple phone call can mean when you're missing out on something big.

    I wish you all the best for FI's dad's health and your wedding.
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  • aRachel21aRachel21 member
    100 Comments 25 Love Its First Anniversary First Answer
    This reminds me of that episode of Friends when Ross gets married in London, phoebe can't travel to the wedding because she was pregnant. Joey walks down the aisle with a cell phone so phoebe can hear the whole ceremony haha.

    I would definitely see if someone can lend him a laptop or ipad so he can Skype or FaceTime or whatever. Even if he isn't there, he can feel like he is there. I think showing him a wedding video just wouldn't be the same. It would be more special if he saw the ceremony in real time.
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  • gailpetegailpete member
    Knottie Warrior 1000 Comments 25 Love Its Name Dropper
    If he will still be in the hospital, there may be a patient care advocate or volunteer at the hospital that may be willing to help with the Skype or sharing of photos as the day progresses.

    If he will be at home, will he be having some home care help coming in that may be able to help out?
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  • VadersValkyrieVadersValkyrie member
    10 Comments 5 Love Its
    We are running into a similar-ish situation with my grandfather; he is quite old and, while physically still fine, he's getting very confused.  My grandmother has said they probably won't make it down in December, so now we have to figure out how to include them.  I am probably going to visit them with my father this summer and am thinking I might bring my dress to show my grandmother me in it.  No party or anything, just a chance to take some pictures.
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