Wedding Etiquette Forum

The people I know...

I have another winning story for you guys!

A little background.. A little over a year ago a friend of mine got engaged and asked me to be a bridesmaid. Her wedding was set for a weekday at 11am and was pot luck. (It gets better) They ended up cancelling their wedding when the groom lost his job, and decided to instead throw themselves an engagement party the week the wedding was supposed to occur. As I've said before, I really don't understand this sudden onset of people throwing their own engagement parties a year plus after they got engaged.

Anyway, I get to the engagement party and the first thing the bride does is ask to see my ring. I hadn't seen her in person since getting engaged. I show her my ring and she calls over to the groom ,"come look at her ring, it looks so much nicer in person!" The groom walks over and agrees, it looks so much better than the pictures they saw online.. Well, now I know you guys talk about how ugly you think my ring is. That isn't rude at all..

A little later on the MOH and I are talking and we notice the bride and groom to be are both wearing wedding bands. We call over our friend and ask her about this, and she says that it is a secret but they actually went through with their original wedding date. No one was there, no one knows, not even family. She said we had to keep it a secret, and she still plans to have a "big princess wedding" at some point next year.

There are just so many things wrong with her logic...
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Re: The people I know...

  • ohhh goodness! just....there are no words. 
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  • wiki8wiki8 member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited June 2013
    @aurianna that's what MOH and I said, the weddings bands are the first thing we noticed! She was like "oh, no one else has mentioned them." And I agree, they were only paying for the site rental, less than $50. I'm sure they paid just as much for the engagement party. Not sure why they needed to cancel it and have a secret wedding instead. She probably has some good qualities I just can't think of any right now... 
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  • wiki8 said:
    I have another winning story for you guys!

    A little background.. A little over a year ago a friend of mine got engaged and asked me to be a bridesmaid. Her wedding was set for a weekday at 11am and was pot luck. (It gets better) They ended up cancelling their wedding when the groom lost his job, and decided to instead throw themselves an engagement party the week the wedding was supposed to occur. As I've said before, I really don't understand this sudden onset of people throwing their own engagement parties a year plus after they got engaged.

    Anyway, I get to the engagement party and the first thing the bride does is ask to see my ring. I hadn't seen her in person since getting engaged. I show her my ring and she calls over to the groom ,"come look at her ring, it looks so much nicer in person!" The groom walks over and agrees, it looks so much better than the pictures they saw online.. Well, now I know you guys talk about how ugly you think my ring is. That isn't rude at all..

    A little later on the MOH and I are talking and we notice the bride and groom to be are both wearing wedding bands. We call over our friend and ask her about this, and she says that it is a secret but they actually went through with their original wedding date. No one was there, no one knows, not even family. She said we had to keep it a secret, and she still plans to have a "big princess wedding" at some point next year.

    There are just so many things wrong with her logic...
    Who are they trying to fool?? Worst secret keepers ever.
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  • I would put a big CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR WEDDING, NANCY AND TOM! on their facebook pages.
    Yeah, I would do this. Who do they think they're fooling if they are going to wear wedding bands?
  • mlg78mlg78 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Answer Name Dropper

    Yeah...along the lines of what Retread said, I would have done this in person and exclaimed quite loudly -- OMG! Are those wedding bands I see?!? Congratulations!!! 

    I'd love to see them recover from that one in person :)

  • wiki8wiki8 member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    @misssunshine17 I have started to realize that weddings show someones character, and have been rethinking a lot of my friendships..
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  • @wiki8, I completely understand. I'm not even talking about some things like cash bars because some people are truly just clueless, but tantrums over BM dress and treating parents who are paying like shit makes me reevaluate, too (these are things I've seen, not your OP). As for your OP, I couldn't handle someone lying like that about something so big...And seriously, wedding bands!? 
  • How weird. If they could afford to host a party, why couldn't they just host that as their reception?


    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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  • AddieL73 said:
    How weird. If they could afford to host a party, why couldn't they just host that as their reception?



    Exactly.

    Officially hitched as of 10/25/13

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  • I just got blasted on weddingbee for calling a do-over wedding a PPD - your story made me feel so much better. :-)
  • I just got blasted on weddingbee for calling a do-over wedding a PPD - your story made me feel so much better. :-)
    Link?



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  • I would be so thoroughly annoyed with that friend.  Why is she still your friend at this point? I might be rethinking my part in this charade wedding.

    I had a cousin who sent out STDs, eloped, had a bridal shower, then had a PPD two months later, then had another family party when she and her H got a convalidation in the Church.  But hey, at least she invited FI (then BF) and I on our own invitation to her PPD.  
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    Previously Alaynajuliana


  • libby2483libby2483 member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary Name Dropper First Comment
    edited June 2013
    Wow...just wow.  What a disaster. Also, your friend doesn't seem very intelligent.  Does she think that the wedding bands won't tip people off to the fact they are already married?
  • monkeysipmonkeysip member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its First Answer
    edited June 2013
    AddieL73 said:
    How weird. If they could afford to host a party, why couldn't they just host that as their reception?


    I'm guessing they decided that if they couldn't afford a big expensive magical fairy tale wedding that it wasn't even worth having a simple, cheap reception.  So why not just go get secretly married, plan a PPD later, throw a gratuitous engagement party, and wear your wedding rings!

    *facepalm*

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  • Time to find yourself some new friends. These folks are known liars.

  • I would put a big CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR WEDDING, NANCY AND TOM! on their facebook pages.
    I did this to FI's younger brother recently when he and his fiancee (now wife) got surprise-married and hinted at having a "real" wedding later on. 
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