Wedding Cakes & Food Forum

Wedding Food ??

Here's the background for my wedding- its my church by the lake, 4-12-14, the colors are black and purple. The reception will be classy but laid back. My FMIL is making the cake and majority of the food (she begged for us to let her do this) Now we are at a loss to what to fix. The reception is at 6. She's wanting finger foods with a light meal. What should we do?

Re: Wedding Food ??

  • I think you need an actual dinner at that time.  People will expect more than a light meal.  Have you checked into your venue permitting someone making the food without insurance and whatnot?
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  • SecBkaSecBka member
    First Comment First Anniversary

    Its at my church- so no problems there. We wanted chickfila to cater, FMIL had other plans. I jus don't know what to actually serve. She can do just about anything and is an amazing cook. My FI really wants her to do it so Im stuck in the middle!

  • She's going to want food that can be made ahead of time so that she's not going crazy the day of the wedding.  How many people?  Does she have experience cooking for the size crowd you're planning on?  Does the church have a full kitchen she can use or will she have to prepare things somewhere else and transport them?  Will she have anyone else helping her cook/serve/set-up/clean-up?  What are some of her specialties and how complicated / time consuming are they?

     

     

     

  • SecBkaSecBka member
    First Comment First Anniversary
    100 people; somewhat experienced has done 2 or 3 friends wedding; she can prepare there; shes planning on preparing some there and some at home; she has a few friends and a few of my family members willing to help her with serve/ set up and clean up but wants myFI to help with cooking (this was throw on me today.
  • Your FI or you should not be cooking on the day of your wedding. If she doesn't have an industrial kitchen to work in, there is no way she should be doing this for 100+ people.

    For that time of day, you need to serve a full meal.  Not just finger foods.  The only thing I can imagine that might be possible would be pasta.  You could make the sauces in advance and freeze it.  So the only thing you are making on the day of the wedding is noodles, etc.   Serve, some appetizers (cheese & crackers, fruit trays, veggie trays, etc.)  and pasta, bread, salad for dinner. 

     

  • SecBka said:
    100 people; somewhat experienced has done 2 or 3 friends wedding; she can prepare there; shes planning on preparing some there and some at home; she has a few friends and a few of my family members willing to help her with serve/ set up and clean up but wants myFI to help with cooking (this was throw on me today.
    Sorry, there is no way in hell I'd let someone unlicensed cater my wedding. Besides, does she really want to spend the majority of the wedding running around taking care of food? You'd think she'd rather be talking with family and friends.
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  • SecBkaSecBka member
    First Comment First Anniversary
    thank you for your opinions.
  • Okay - 100 people, she'll have some help (not FI though!), can do some prep ahead of time, and she's got a full kitchen to work with at the church, wedding is in April (not too hot), she has some experience, and your reception is at a meal-time...

    I don't think it's a great idea to have a non-professional cater your wedding (liability issues, etc) but since that's not really what you're asking, I'm going to try to stick to what you've asked and assume she knows about keeping cold foods cold and hot foods hot and what can be made in advance and what will/won't work on a buffet, etc... 

    So here's a possible menu -

    veggie trays that can be made ahead of time - she can cut all the veggies the day before and put them in lg ziploc bags, then have someone put the trays together at the church

    cheese/meat/cracker trays that can be made ahead of time

    spinach dip (like Knorr's) with bread chunks and veggies

    meatballs in red sauce - both can be made ahead of time and frozen, then combined in crock pots for the buffet

    sliced provolone cheese - for meatball sandwiches

    italian rolls for meatball sandwiches - smaller sized - look for rolls that will hold 2 - 3 meatballs

    macaroni and cheese - can be made ahead of time and frozen, then reheated at the church

    large green salad with bottles of dressings to choose from

    cake

    You could substitute sloppy joes or pulled pork for the meatballs; lasagna or baked ziti for the macaroni and cheese - the point is to keep it as simple as possible with as much make-ahead stuff as possible...

    hth!

     

     

     

     

  • PDKH said:
    SecBka said:
    100 people; somewhat experienced has done 2 or 3 friends wedding; she can prepare there; shes planning on preparing some there and some at home; she has a few friends and a few of my family members willing to help her with serve/ set up and clean up but wants myFI to help with cooking (this was throw on me today.
    Sorry, there is no way in hell I'd let someone unlicensed cater my wedding. Besides, does she really want to spend the majority of the wedding running around taking care of food? You'd think she'd rather be talking with family and friends.
    I'm mostly concerned about someone getting sick.  I mean, all it takes is one dish not heated/cooled properly or a bad ingredient for a food poisoning incident.  

    Plus, the quoted.  You'd think the mother of the groom and other friends/family (who OP mentioned would help serve, etc) would want to participate in the festivities rather than being the unpaid help.
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  • SecBkaSecBka member
    First Comment First Anniversary
    wow. just simply wow. it was not about someone getting sick at my wedding. I asked for help on what to fix. not get everyone to tell me what they wouldn't do at THIER wedding. read the context of the question and realize I didn't ask for opinions on how MY WEDDING should be done. that's the clue-MINE. Also if my FI wants to help then that's his choice. KYRAN32 is the only one who answered, gave an opinion too. BUT GAVE ME THE ANWSER I WAS LOOKING FOR. I seriously believe some of you sit here trolling just to see how rude you can be. all of you take a note of what KYRAN32 did, still gave an opinion but also enlisted the answer to my question! thank you and any more negativity just inbox me so I can be sure to give it proper attention!
  • SecBka said:
    wow. just simply wow. it was not about someone getting sick at my wedding. I asked for help on what to fix. not get everyone to tell me what they wouldn't do at THIER wedding. read the context of the question and realize I didn't ask for opinions on how MY WEDDING should be done. that's the clue-MINE. Also if my FI wants to help then that's his choice. KYRAN32 is the only one who answered, gave an opinion too. BUT GAVE ME THE ANWSER I WAS LOOKING FOR. I seriously believe some of you sit here trolling just to see how rude you can be. all of you take a note of what KYRAN32 did, still gave an opinion but also enlisted the answer to my question! thank you and any more negativity just inbox me so I can be sure to give it proper attention!


    No one was rude. they told you, having your family serve food to 100+ people can be dangerous.  We've seen it here plenty of times.  Mom & gramma want to cook for your wedding to save money, and you end up with food borne illness because they don't have the proper equipment to keep the food cold/warm. Or, you end up with no pictures of your family, because everyone was in the kitchen cooking/serving food.

    We don't make this shit up.

    By the way, people did give you advice. I even gave you a friggin menu.  

  • SecBka said:
    wow. just simply wow. it was not about someone getting sick at my wedding. I asked for help on what to fix. not get everyone to tell me what they wouldn't do at THIER wedding. read the context of the question and realize I didn't ask for opinions on how MY WEDDING should be done. that's the clue-MINE. Also if my FI wants to help then that's his choice. KYRAN32 is the only one who answered, gave an opinion too. BUT GAVE ME THE ANWSER I WAS LOOKING FOR. I seriously believe some of you sit here trolling just to see how rude you can be. all of you take a note of what KYRAN32 did, still gave an opinion but also enlisted the answer to my question! thank you and any more negativity just inbox me so I can be sure to give it proper attention!
    So you want everyone to lie to you just so you can get the answers you want?  Ummm, yeah.....no.

    That said, I would never have family or friends cook for my wedding.  Don't you want them to enjoy the day?  And god forbid someone gets sick....do you really want to be remembered as the wedding where people got sick?  Stick to your original plan and cater.  Tell your future MIL "thank you, but we want you to enjoy the day!"
  • SecBka said:
    wow. just simply wow. it was not about someone getting sick at my wedding. I asked for help on what to fix. not get everyone to tell me what they wouldn't do at THIER wedding. read the context of the question and realize I didn't ask for opinions on how MY WEDDING should be done. that's the clue-MINE. Also if my FI wants to help then that's his choice. KYRAN32 is the only one who answered, gave an opinion too. BUT GAVE ME THE ANWSER I WAS LOOKING FOR. I seriously believe some of you sit here trolling just to see how rude you can be. all of you take a note of what KYRAN32 did, still gave an opinion but also enlisted the answer to my question! thank you and any more negativity just inbox me so I can be sure to give it proper attention!
    Well, you're not entitled to control how people answer your question.

    And if people don't agree with what you want to do, you don't get to expect them to not say so.

    I myself would not ask a close family member or friend to act as caterer or otherwise "work" at my wedding, especially if s/he isn't licensed to do the work in question. 

    And it's really not a good idea for a parent of the couple to be catering.  They will have on nice clothes which could be damaged through cooking and serving, plus, they would have to spend most of their time cooking, serving, and cleaning up rather than socializing, taking pictures, and doing whatever a parent of the couple would normally do at a wedding.
  • edited July 2013
    SecBka said: wow. just simply wow. it was not about someone getting sick at my wedding. I asked for help on what to fix. not get everyone to tell me what they wouldn't do at THIER wedding. read the context of the question and realize I didn't ask for opinions on how MY WEDDING should be done. that's the clue-MINE. Also if my FI wants to help then that's his choice. KYRAN32 is the only one who answered, gave an opinion too. BUT GAVE ME THE ANWSER I WAS LOOKING FOR. I seriously believe some of you sit here trolling just to see how rude you can be. all of you take a note of what KYRAN32 did, still gave an opinion but also enlisted the answer to my question! thank you and any more negativity just inbox me so I can be sure to give it proper attention!


    Whoa. This is way out of line. Take it easy. If you're
    this upset about people trying to help you and get you to think about things you might not have thought about...... I'm worried you will have a complete meltdown the day of when/if something goes wrong. 

    All people are saying is that you need to think about how hard it is to cook for 100 people and keep it safe, uncomplicated and delicious. People are cautioning you because it will be difficult to accomplish those things and no one wants a stressed out bride. I think you know this is a bad idea and you're trying to enable your FMIL to keep her happy. Honestly, I would let her make your wedding cake or make the food for cocktail hour and then do Chik-fil-A like you wanted to do in the first place.
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  • Jesus, it's like they told you your baby's ugly.


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  • beet shooters, tomato and green salad, chicken with herb butter, and walnut  and cinnamon icing  mini cupcakes
  • wow I feel sorry for her she did just ask for menu options and then everyone got all high and mighty about people getting sick at her wedding. It's your wedding honey if you and your fiance want your MIL to cook then go for it.
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  • Jen4948Jen4948 member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    edited July 2013
    wow I feel sorry for her she did just ask for menu options and then everyone got all high and mighty about people getting sick at her wedding. It's your wedding honey if you and your fiance want your MIL to cook then go for it.
    We're not here to validate ideas we don't consider good.  Disagreeing is not being "all high and mighty."  Everyone has the right to do so.

    Sorry, but "it's your wedding honey if you and your fiance want X go for it" doesn't fly here.  If that's what the couple wants, then they can elope.  As soon as they involve one other person, it is no longer exclusively all about what the couple wants.
  • actually it is all about what the couple wants obviously if she and her fiance wants her FMIL to cook than that's what's GOING TO HAPPEN.
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  • We self-catered my wedding. It was for 150 at my church, but not at mealtime. I helped make some of food myself and it made things more special and festive for the week of the wedding. That said, we had lots of helpers in the church kitchen serving and preparing (teacher friends of my  mom's). We served things like cocktail weiners, ham roll-ups (ham stuffed with cream cheese and green onions), cheese and crackers, fruit and veggie trays, chicken salad tarts, mints, nuts, and cakes. Punch, water and coffee.
  • actually it is all about what the couple wants obviously if she and her fiance wants her FMIL to cook than that's what's GOING TO HAPPEN.
    We don't have to validate what we think are bad ideas.  The very act of posting here in this forum is solicitation for opinions.  The FMIL may want to cater, but I stand by my opinion stated above that for the reasons listed it's not a good idea.

    Also, no, weddings are not "all about what the couple wants."  The instant they include a single other person, it also becomes about what that person wants.  Any couple who wants their wedding to be only about what they want should elope.  It is rude not to consider other people's needs in the planning of one's wedding. 
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