Need to vent...

So I've been meeting with a couple wedding photographers, trying to see who we clicked with and pricing etc.  Well, last night I sent my mother two photographers who I really liked. My mother disliked both of them.  She couldn't see why they were so expensive (that's a whole other topic right there) and they didn't have any plus sized bride pictures.  Granted when I spoke with both of them I asked if they've ever shot a wedding with a plus sized bride, and they both showed me examples of their work (one has amazing boudoir photos too).  But she made me feel like crap. She was like, well it's different when you have a skinny bride versus your size...etc. Being a photographer myself it's not really that different, it's just about a) making sure everyone is comfortable, and b) knowing how to pose people flatteringly. I'm just SICK and TIRED of every conversation being about the fact that I'm a plus size. UGH! And the hilarious thing, she's not Tiny herself! Though when she got married she did lose a TON of weight--but still.  My mother's opinion means the world to me, and I know she doesn't mean to hurt me, but I'm tired of being defined by my weight. I'm a bride, let me be a bride and not just a "plus sized" bride.  :-( 

On another note: does anyone in the New England (specifically Boston) area have any recommendations on photographers, perhaps that they've used or that they are using?? 

Sorry...just needed to vent. 
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Re: Need to vent...

  •                      Your mom may have unrealistic ideas about what good wedding photography costs these days-and it looks like you're in a fairly expensive area. I'd let her do some research herself-she'll come to see that prices are higher than she thinks.
         The vendor directory at includes a lot of great photographers many who will give price breaks for referrals from that website. I found mine there and really love them-they aren't East Coast though.
     Finally I feel your pain-my mother expresses ideas like that and it is hurtful.
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  • I totally get where you're coming from @ashwise. My mom defines me by my size as well. I'm located I New England (which is definitely an expensive area for weddings/photography). We're using Gabrielle Marks Photography for our wedding in September. I don't think there are plus sized brides in her portfolio, but if you view her blog I know there are some plus sized brides in there. She works with her husband and they're super nice people. We're really looking forward to working with them. We didn't think their pricing was terrible (one of the lowest we looked at)., but we booked over a year ago so it may be different now.

    Good luck finding your dream photographer and dealing with your mom!
  • It sounds like your mom may be a little jealous she's not in the limelight. Perhaps you can suggest she looks for some photographers and brings what she finds to you. If she does her research she'll notice how much photographers cost and how they bring in business (usually by posting examples of skinnier girls). If she doesn't like who you pick put the pressure on her to find someone better and if she can't maybe she'll give into one of the two you liked. Best of luck!

  • I looked at photographers websites in the family or portrait sections. I found a few that could make ladies like us comfortable in the photo and position everyone and thing in the shot to flatter us. Good luck finding a photographer. I looked hard for about 4 months.
    Relax, take your time, do lots of surfing the web and such. I expected to pay $1000 to 5500. I hit the middle and am pleased.
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