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Vegas Wedding Woes

kaylaharmon2014kaylaharmon2014
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in Wedding Etiquette Forum
So, after lots of stress and pressure to "just get it over with" we eloped to Las Vegas and got married by Elvis. It was the WORST IDEA EVER. I am having serious trouble dealing with the regret of not having the big wedding I knew I wanted... What should we do now?
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Re: Vegas Wedding Woes

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    SilverSarahBSilverSarahB member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment
    Talk through your feelings with your now husband/wife.   It's okay to have these feelings, but you can talk through them with your new partner and come to terms with them! We all have choices we regret, talk to them and let them help you through.  If you're having trouble, talk through and figure out exactly which parts of a wedding you feel you missed and help get yourself to find the joy in finally marrying someone you wanted to marry.  Maybe setup a dinner to celebrate your new marriage, or save up for a big anniversary bash five years from now.  Or maybe you're really just missing a bit of excited time with your mother/sister/bff and you can have that with a girl's weekend.  
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    kaylaharmon2014kaylaharmon2014
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    My biggest regret is that none of our friends or family were there to celebrate, pictures were horrific and the ceremony was terribly cheesy and embarrassing. I love who I married, I just hate how I did it.
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    southernbelle0915southernbelle0915 mod
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    Good that you love who you married! Celebrate with your family and friends by throwing a party. Don't do a fake ceremony (you're already married) or pretend you're a bride. Just throw a kick ass party.
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    Bubbles2014Bubbles2014 member
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    Sorry to hear all this - no one should hate how they got married. But, you did it so now you have to figure out how to deal with your feelings. You could have a party to celebrate, and/or hire a photographer and get all dolled up in your wedding gear and have a rock the dress session.

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    WinstonsGirlWinstonsGirl member
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    Ditto PP's.  Do a kick ass rock the dress photo session and throw an amazing party celebrating your recent marriage.  Have dinner, dancing, cake and a good time.  Congratulations on being married!!

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    Xstatic3333Xstatic3333 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Answer First Comment
    Another vote for a big, awesome party. Congrats on your marriage!
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    Teddy917Teddy917 member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its First Answer
    Rock the dress session. Maybe write down vows that you would've like to say to your spouse and exchange them privately. And have a party with your family.
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    Dreamergirl8812Dreamergirl8812 member
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    kaylaharmon2014 said:
    So, after lots of stress and pressure to "just get it over with" we eloped to Las Vegas and got married by Elvis. It was the WORST IDEA EVER. I am having serious trouble dealing with the regret of not having the big wedding I knew I wanted... What should we do now?
    There are so many things missing from this story. Who told you to get it over with? And were the pictures really "horrific?" I would think horrific pictures would involve slaughtered corpses.



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    misssunshine17misssunshine17 member
    First Anniversary First Answer 5 Love Its First Comment
    You cannot have a re-do wedding because you are married. Throw an awesome party. No one will be mad about free booze and great food. I wouldn't wear a wedding dress, since you're now a wife. No re-do ceremony. 

    I would definitely buy a dress and have a photo session with your husband, though, so you'll have the pictures you want. This is a victim-less crime. 
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    crunchymamaof2 crunchymamaof2 member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its Name Dropper

    a trash the dress session with you destroying a cutout of Elvis could help you vent and get you some awesome pictures (I'd take some nice ones with your DH first though).

    After 6 years and 2 boys, finally tying the knot on October 27th, 2013!

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    winelover123winelover123 member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary First Comment First Answer
    edited August 2013
    Have a rock the dress photo shoot. Have a big party to celebrate - buy a rockin' dress.
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    Catwoman708Catwoman708 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment

    Lots of people have regrets about their wedding, no matter how big, small, elaborate, tacky, classy, or whether loved ones attended or not. 

    As with many important events in your life, you don't get "do-overs".  Yes, you can stage a "second wedding" but it's just not the same.  If guest know you are already married, they may feel it's silly or not be as excited about attending (whether they tell you this or not), or will feel "duped" if they don't know and find out afterwards.   

    I'd focus on a reception celebrating your recent wedding, as simple or elaborate as you want.  You can have a "vow renewal", or a brief "marriage blessing" mini ceremony if you feel you need to have some kind of ceremony. 

    IMO, if you have a later "at home reception" after an elopement, the sooner the better.  I don't know about other people, but no matter how happy I am for someone, my interest in their wedding celebration wanes pretty quickly, so after a few months, it's more like just going to a party.  Which is fun, sure, but not the same feeling as a wedding.

    PS, I like the idea of a "trash the dress" session with the life size cut-out of Elvis, lol.  Might actually work to get you some closure over the disappointing elopement.

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    kaylaharmon2014kaylaharmon2014
    First Comment
    My mom, stepdad and grandparents were all very vocal about their dissapointment of me "living in sin" with my now hubby and said they didn't feel like having a wedding was even appropriate given the fact that we've already slept together.
    No slaughtered corpses, lol. All of them have us in odd poses or facial expressions and are severely unflattering. I am more interested in burning the cd and photos than anything.
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    Simply FatedSimply Fated member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Answer Name Dropper
    kaylaharmon2014 said:

    My mom, stepdad and grandparents were all very vocal about their dissapointment of me "living in sin" with my now hubby and said they didn't feel like having a wedding was even appropriate given the fact that we've already slept together.
    No slaughtered corpses, lol. All of them have us in odd poses or facial expressions and are severely unflattering. I am more interested in burning the cd and photos than anything.

    I disagree with your family.
    It's your life, not theirs.
    I understand that what they said bothered you, but it caused you to make a life decision that you now regret. Please take this as a lesson learned. Do NOT pay attention to the crap they spew anymore.

    Take you husband and your child and have a kick-ass photo session together somewhere special. Hire a professional photographer to come with you, bring several changes of clothes and make NEW memories.
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