They knew and they did it anyway...

KDM323 · August 2013

jeull64 said:

So, let me get this straight... you would have her husband wage a battle with his family over her last name? Seriously? You want him to have to chose between his FAMILY and his WIFE? over a LAST NAME? because that is exactly what you are going to force him to do.

He has already chosen to spend the rest of his life with her. Now, she wants to alienate his family because they wont use the correct last name?

Drama much??

As for this? What I'm reading in this post is insecurity.

When a man chooses a wife, he chooses to put HER above his parents. Period. Sometimes I think parents have a very hard time swallowing that pill. The wife comes FIRST. And they have to respect that wife and her wishes.

If his parents can't have the decency to treat the wife with respect (and that includes calling her by her proper name) then yes, he gets to tell them that they are wrong and set expectations and boundaries.

This son isn't asking that they move across the country in order to see him or giving them a list of a million demands...he is saying "call my wife by her proper name".

That's not really a very demanding request. I mean seriously...how hard is it to call someone Jane Smith instead of Jane Doe?

vk2204 · August 2013

drexelkathy said:

@southernbelle0915...I agree with you and I see it this way.

Let's just swap out "names" here for a moment for the sake of an example.

Let's say that you were a vegetarian. You didn't eat meat. Not that you have an allergy, but that by CHOICE you don't eat meat.

And yet, your MIL insists on cooking every.single.meal with meat in it, every time you see her and every time you visit her house. In HER opinion, you should eat meat. It won't 'hurt' you.

Your husband has says "southernbelle doesn't eat meat" to his mother and asked her politely to please just NOT put meat in the spaghetti sauce or even just leave the pasta separate from the sauce so that you can have something to eat when you go to dinner at their house.

But yet, KNOWING that you don't eat meat, she continues to serve meat at every single meal and refuses to make ANY accommodations whatsoever for a guest she is inviting into her home.

It is rude. It is inconsiderate. It is passive aggressive bullshit. And she is wrong.

You aren't asking her to make a MAJOR accommodation to her world or her life by addressing you by your chosen name. Yet, she refuses to do so.

Its rude, it is inconsiderate and I'm sorry your MIL treats you that way. It is a poor reflection on HER. (And I'm also glad your husband has your back...he SHOULD. He is your husband. Heck, he probably realizes that his mother has passive aggressive tendencies. I bet if you look real hard, you'll see she has a history of doing passive aggressive things to her family/friends in order to get her way.)

This is good.

ElcaB · August 2013

drexelkathy said:

@southernbelle0915...I agree with you and I see it this way.

Let's just swap out "names" here for a moment for the sake of an example.

Let's say that you were a vegetarian. You didn't eat meat. Not that you have an allergy, but that by CHOICE you don't eat meat.

And yet, your MIL insists on cooking every.single.meal with meat in it, every time you see her and every time you visit her house. In HER opinion, you should eat meat. It won't 'hurt' you.

Your husband has says "southernbelle doesn't eat meat" to his mother and asked her politely to please just NOT put meat in the spaghetti sauce or even just leave the pasta separate from the sauce so that you can have something to eat when you go to dinner at their house.

But yet, KNOWING that you don't eat meat, she continues to serve meat at every single meal and refuses to make ANY accommodations whatsoever for a guest she is inviting into her home.

It is rude. It is inconsiderate. It is passive aggressive bullshit. And she is wrong.

You aren't asking her to make a MAJOR accommodation to her world or her life by addressing you by your chosen name. Yet, she refuses to do so.

Its rude, it is inconsiderate and I'm sorry your MIL treats you that way. It is a poor reflection on HER. (And I'm also glad your husband has your back...he SHOULD. He is your husband. Heck, he probably realizes that his mother has passive aggressive tendencies. I bet if you look real hard, you'll see she has a history of doing passive aggressive things to her family/friends in order to get her way.)

I love you because I love analogies like Harry Potter loves quidditch (see what I did there?), and this one was excellent!

KDM323 · August 2013

jeull64 said:

Is it really worth a family battle? I mean, I know its your name and its important. But, is it worth the potential fallout?? what if they stop speaking as a result? was it worth it?

I have been married almost 30 years, and please take this advice with the care it is meant with....

when it comes to the in-laws... choose your battles very carefully ... you will not win them all, and after a few years you will learn it isnt worth the repeated head butting to hurt everyone.

For instance, is the way they address mail critically important? Is it more important than say, perhaps a dispute over how you discipline your future children? Or what holidays each side of your family you will spend the holiday with?

In the long run, its just mail.

Another thing - @jeull64 - see, the thing is...the in laws? They don't get a say in how potential children are disciplined. They don't get a say in where southernbelle and her husband spend their holidays. If they'd be so immature and manipulative as to stop speaking to the OP and her husband because southernbelle wants to be called "Smith" rather than "Jones" then it indicates that the IN LAWS have unhealthy expectations and unhealthy means of relating with other people and will use guilt and manipulation in order to achieve their desired results.

There is absolutely no reason that southernbelle has to put up with her IL calling her by a wrong name in order to "save the battle" for another battle because really and truly? There aren't any battles that should ever NEED to be held with the IL.

southernbelle (presumably) married an ADULT man. And she is an adult. Therefore, they get to make decisions for how they will live THEIR married life TOGETHER. They don't need to ask either set of parents where they spend holidays, what they do with their vacations and SURELY not how to raise their children.

Those decisions get to be made by them. And either their parents support them and respect them or they don't.

I have ZERO conflict with my future in laws about anything...nor do we have conflict with my parents. Because no one tries to use guilt, manipulations, coersion, etc. to force anyone into doing things "their way". We're all adults with healthy boundaries and healthy appreciations for one another.

I, personally, have zero tolerance for bullshit like "is this a hill to die on". Because 99% of the time? It is forcing a person to sacrifice one of THEIR boundaries/choices/decisions because the other party is encroaching on it and using manipulations, etc to do so.

In laws do not get a say in how a married couple runs their life, raises their children, spends their holidays, etc...and they surely do not get a say in what the OP's NAME is.

TiaTea · August 2013

@southernbelle0915
Then go ahead and be mad . But see what happens here:
"The issue here is that if you KNOW what someone's name is and you decide to call them something else because it's easier for you, more comfortable for you, rolls off the tongue better, etc. "
and
"H and I asked that I be addressed by my name. They refuse to do so because they don't agree with my choice. THAT'S what bothers me. ..."

If they were just being silly - no need to worry about it. If they made a mistake - why bother?
But If they did it on on purpos and that bothers you , they already won.

How often in "real life" are they going to address you by your first and last name ( or his last name) ? Aren't they going to call you "s-belle" when they talk to you?
If they did it to get on your nerves, an if it bothers you, and that was what they wanted, the'll call you Mrs Hisname all the time and laugh at you ( or behind you).

So yes, it wouldn't bother me. I know my name. They know my name. I make sure I get my important documents on my real name and spelled corectly. Everything else - who cares.They can address the corespondence to Mr. Husband and Dr Seuss for all I care.

s-aries8990 · August 2013

TiaTea said:

@southernbelle0915
Then go ahead and be mad . But see what happens here:
"The issue here is that if you KNOW what someone's name is and you decide to call them something else because it's easier for you, more comfortable for you, rolls off the tongue better, etc. "
and
"H and I asked that I be addressed by my name. They refuse to do so because they don't agree with my choice. THAT'S what bothers me. ..."

If they were just being silly - no need to worry about it. If they made a mistake - why bother?
But If they did it on on purpos and that bothers you , they already won.

How often in "real life" are they going to address you by your first and last name ( or his last name) ? Aren't they going to call you "s-belle" when they talk to you?
If they did it to get on your nerves, an if it bothers you, and that was what they wanted, the'll call you Mrs Hisname all the time and laugh at you ( or behind you).

So yes, it wouldn't bother me. I know my name. They know my name. I make sure I get my important documents on my real name and spelled corectly. Everything else - who cares.They can address the corespondence to Mr. Husband and Dr Seuss for all I care.

But that's YOU! This is something that is OBVIOUSLY important to her. If you have read the thread, you know that they've done it multiple times and disregard her feelings.

southernbelle0915 · August 2013

@TiaTea - you are missing the point. TBH, it's not really applicable whether you would or wouldn't be personally offended by deliberate disrespect. If YOU and YOUR husband/FI/SO don't care when people disrespect you on purpose and decide to let it keep happening, that's your prerogative.

If my FIL said to me, "s-belle, I noticed that you wrote Mr. LastName-A. I wanted to make sure you knew that my name is LastName-B." I would be horribly embarrassed and say, "I am really sorry, FIL, I will be sure to address you correctly in the future." I wouldn't say, "Well, FIL, I don't think your last name should be LastName-B, so I'm going to keep calling you LastName-A." That would be rude and disrespectful to my FIL. Anyone who disagrees with that... I cannot help you or have a logical discussion with you about this. It's so simple and basic.

So, like adults, we are addressing it as adults should do - correcting the misstep and setting expectations going forward. The mature and respectful receipt of this message by FIL and SIL would be, "I'm really sorry. I will be sure to address s-belle correctly in the future." An immature and disrespectful receipt of that message would be "Well, I don't think s-belle's last name should be LastName-B, so I'm going to keep calling her LastName-A."

Get it now? If not, I cannot help you.

SingleMom31 · August 2013

Can I ask a silly question -- With the exception of this, how do your ILs treat you -- Are they otherwise loving, caring, great to you people, or is this one of many issues that you have with them? If it's the former, whether you view this as being disrespectful or not, are you willing to risk that relationship over this? If I were them and being called out for not addressing mail sent to the both you properly, I'd really pull back, would definitely judge, and probably treat you differently.

Here's another example - Our daughter's name is Isabella. I hate Izzy and Bella, so we always call her by her full name or Isa (like Lisa without the L). My dad doesn't get it... He spells her nickname Esa (which is how it sounds) or calls her Izzy. I explained it once - Her name is Isabella, we shortened it to Isa. Didn't work. Now, I could keep correcting him, threaten to not let him see her, etc. because he can't even get her name right. But, he's an awesome dad otherwise and is great with Isa, so I just shake my head and look at Izzy as his term of endearment. I still hate the name and it's not HER name, but I know that the alternative is him not bothering with sending her mail, not sending me the nice card periodically telling me that I'm doing a good job with her, etc... I don't hate it that much.

KatWAG · August 2013

SingleMom31 said:

Can I ask a silly question -- With the exception of this, how do your ILs treat you -- Are they otherwise loving, caring, great to you people, or is this one of many issues that you have with them? If it's the former, whether you view this as being disrespectful or not, are you willing to risk that relationship over this? If I were them and being called out for not addressing mail sent to the both you properly, I'd really pull back, would definitely judge, and probably treat you differently.

Here's another example - Our daughter's name is Isabella. I hate Izzy and Bella, so we always call her by her full name or Isa (like Lisa without the L). My dad doesn't get it... He spells her nickname Esa (which is how it sounds) or calls her Izzy. I explained it once - Her name is Isabella, we shortened it to Isa. Didn't work. Now, I could keep correcting him, threaten to not let him see her, etc. because he can't even get her name right. But, he's an awesome dad otherwise and is great with Isa, so I just shake my head and look at Izzy as his term of endearment. I still hate the name and it's not HER name, but I know that the alternative is him not bothering with sending her mail, not sending me the nice card periodically telling me that I'm doing a good job with her, etc... I don't hate it that much.

If you dont care that much what your daughter is called, that is fine. But Southern cleearly does care. I dont think it is too much to ask that her ILs respect her decision, regardless of whether of not they are generally good/ nice people.

For me, this is a hill to die on. My name is Kathryn. If you call me Kat, Kath, Katie or Kathy. I will not respond. Its not my name. People have learned to respect that.

Stay strong, Southern!

TiaTea · August 2013

@southernbelle0915 "Get it now? If not, I cannot help you."
And I should have listened to my own advice! Why on the world did I even care?
I got that.

southernbelle0915 · August 2013

SingleMom31 said:

Can I ask a silly question -- With the exception of this, how do your ILs treat you -- Are they otherwise loving, caring, great to you people, or is this one of many issues that you have with them? If it's the former, whether you view this as being disrespectful or not, are you willing to risk that relationship over this? If I were them and being called out for not addressing mail sent to the both you properly, I'd really pull back, would definitely judge, and probably treat you differently.
Here's another example - Our daughter's name is Isabella. I hate Izzy and Bella, so we always call her by her full name or Isa (like Lisa without the L). My dad doesn't get it... He spells her nickname Esa (which is how it sounds) or calls her Izzy. I explained it once - Her name is Isabella, we shortened it to Isa. Didn't work. Now, I could keep correcting him, threaten to not let him see her, etc. because he can't even get her name right. But, he's an awesome dad otherwise and is great with Isa, so I just shake my head and look at Izzy as his term of endearment. I still hate the name and it's not HER name, but I know that the alternative is him not bothering with sending her mail, not sending me the nice card periodically telling me that I'm doing a good job with her, etc... I don't hate it that much.

First bolded:

I'm curious how it's "risking a relationship" if my H says to his dad and sister, "hey guys, I know you don't agree with s-belle's personal choice to keep her last name, but it's her name and it feels disrespectful to both of us when you address her by the wrong name when you know what her name is." Neither H or I are going to let the relationship go to shit over it - as long as they respond in a mature and respectful way, which is TOTALLY within their control.

Second bolded:

Neither H or I have any control of how they decide to judge us for bringing this to their attention. If they "pull back, judge and treat us differently" because of this... welp - I can't control that and it's THEIR choice.

To your example:

What if your dad said, "SingleMom31 - I don't like the nickname Isa or Isabella. In fact, I think her name should be Pamela because my grandmothers name is Pamela. I've always thought you should have named her Pamela so I will call her Pamela." Then you said, "Gosh dad, I'd really appreciate it if you would respect the name we/I chose for her, which is Isabella." After you told your dad this, he continued to call your daughter Pamela because he thought that's what her name should be.

Because THAT'S what this is - not a preference on a nickname. It's apples and oranges.

jeull64 · August 2013

http://awesomegifs.com/2012/07/beating-a-dead-horse/

SingleMom31 · August 2013

Clearly, nobody here is going to change your mind -- I was only suggesting that you think about their potential reaction.

I'm not disagreeing that you're right/they're wrong, but you can't change their behavior - only your reaction to it. Now, they may surprise you and change their behavior (best case) and if they do, great. But, what if they don't, what are you prepared to do? If they keep sending you mail to Mr. and Mrs. Simpson -- Are you going to have your husband call them every time? Stop seeing them because they're so disrespectful towards you? If they come up with something else that's technically correct but missing the spirit (Homer Simpson and Family, Homer and Marge - omitting last names), are you going to call them out too? If they think that you're reacting disproportionately and immaturely, and tell his side of the family about it, will you be mad? How about if they tell the story as, "Marge made Homer call us last night because we weren't being respectful (eye roll) to her. Can you believe that she's acting like this about our last name? It's a perfectly good last name," are you prepared that other family members may think of you differently too?

I just see this as an opportunity to be a bigger person and not let something get to you. There are a lot of ways to show your respect for someone, and if they show you respect in every other way, maybe choosing to not let this one way get to you will make for a better long-term relationship.

OjitosVerdes · August 2013

Liatris2010 said:

I feel like I stepped into bizarre-o world. When did requesting to be called by your correct name become an unreasonable, relationship destroying request?

This.

blueobsidian · August 2013

SingleMom31 said:

Clearly, nobody here is going to change your mind -- I was only suggesting that you think about their potential reaction.
I'm not disagreeing that you're right/they're wrong, but you can't change their behavior - only your reaction to it. Now, they may surprise you and change their behavior (best case) and if they do, great. But, what if they don't, what are you prepared to do? If they keep sending you mail to Mr. and Mrs. Simpson -- Are you going to have your husband call them every time? Stop seeing them because they're so disrespectful towards you? If they come up with something else that's technically correct but missing the spirit (Homer Simpson and Family, Homer and Marge - omitting last names), are you going to call them out too? If they think that you're reacting disproportionately and immaturely, and tell his side of the family about it, will you be mad? How about if they tell the story as, "Marge made Homer call us last night because we weren't being respectful (eye roll) to her. Can you believe that she's acting like this about our last name? It's a perfectly good last name," are you prepared that other family members may think of you differently too?
I just see this as an opportunity to be a bigger person and not let something get to you. There are a lot of ways to show your respect for someone, and if they show you respect in every other way, maybe choosing to not let this one way get to you will make for a better long-term relationship.

If, after one or two polite corrections, someone continues to intentionally disrespect me, why would I want to continue to see them or spend time with them? I don't get the idea that you have to keep people in your life who are rude to you. You don't. You can choose to surround yourself with people who treat you with respect and kindness.

My parents and I are very close, but if they were continuously rude to my FI, why would I continue to subject him to that? We are a team and have committed to a life together. Would you tell your SO that he just has to deal with it for the rest of his life if your family was rude to him, or would you step in and do something?

jeull64 · August 2013

southernbelle and her husband are being very clear. They are going BOTH to demand the respect she deserves from his parents, no matter what the cost. That is of course, well within their rights. We each can expect people to live up to our expectations or we can chose to not allow them in our lives if they do not do as we demand. From what southernbelle has said, it isnt her fault, nor her husband's that his parents won't be a part of their lives, it was strictly the choice of the inlaws.

Any input and/or differing advice is unwanted and unnecessary. This should have been labeled as a RANT.

southernbelle0915 · August 2013

jeull64 said:

southernbelle and her husband are being very clear. They are going BOTH to demand the respect she deserves from his parents, no matter what the cost. That is of course, well within their rights. We each can expect people to live up to our expectations or we can chose to not allow them in our lives if they do not do as we demand. From what southernbelle has said, it isnt her fault, nor her husband's that his parents won't be a part of their lives, it was strictly the choice of the inlaws.

Any input and/or differing advice is unwanted and unnecessary. This should have been labeled as a RANT.

What are you talking about? I never said H and I were going to cut them out of our lives, refuse to visit them, abstain from speaking to them, etc.

Once again jeull64, I don't know where you come up with these dramatic things, but it's not from anything I've said.

jeull64 · August 2013

@southernbelle

you didnt say it in so many words, no. But heaven forbid they dont call you by your maiden name. You and your husband just wont abide by it. What do you expect the outcome to be? Thats a serious question.

If they dont stop, what do you expect the outcome to be?

MobKaz · August 2013

jeull64 said:

southernbelle and her husband are being very clear. They are going BOTH to demand the respect she deserves from his parents, no matter what the cost. That is of course, well within their rights. We each can expect people to live up to our expectations or we can chose to not allow them in our lives if they do not do as we demand. From what southernbelle has said, it isnt her fault, nor her husband's that his parents won't be a part of their lives, it was strictly the choice of the inlaws.

Any input and/or differing advice is unwanted and unnecessary. This should have been labeled as a RANT.

The important, and missing variable here, is that the IN-LAWS created this utter display of deliberate disrespect. If a price is to be paid, I hope the in-laws realize how deeply they may have to reach into their pockets for what should be a COMMON courtesy.

Frankly, jeull64, you sound like a (in-law) woman scorned.

Southernbelle and her husband have no choice but to be clear. Subtlety obviously does not work with her in-laws.

southernbelle0915 · August 2013

jeull64 said:

@southernbelle

you didnt say it in so many words, no. But heaven forbid they dont call you by your maiden name. You and your husband just wont abide by it. What do you expect the outcome to be? Thats a serious question.

If they dont stop, what do you expect the outcome to be?

ETA: In other words, jeull64 - a prolonged conversation with you about this is about the last thing I'm going to do on a Friday afternoon. Sorry.

KDM323 · August 2013

I am so grateful for my fMIL right...think I'm going to go and give her a call!

jeull64 · August 2013

So, when asked a serious question the OP runs off. Exactly as was expected. There isnt an answer that can be provided.

Time to walk away from this topic completely, she isnt interested in anything other than getting a cookie cutter response.

blueobsidian · August 2013

jeull64 said:

@southernbelle

you didnt say it in so many words, no. But heaven forbid they dont call you by your maiden name. You and your husband just wont abide by it. What do you expect the outcome to be? Thats a serious question.

If they dont stop, what do you expect the outcome to be?

If someone decided to intentionally and repeatedly disrespect you, what would the outcome be? Would you just keep smiling and let them disrespect your decisions and choices or would you stand up for yourself?

KDM323 · August 2013

jeull64 said:

So, when asked a serious question the OP runs off. Exactly as was expected. There isnt an answer that can be provided.

Time to walk away from this topic completely, she isnt interested in anything other than getting a cookie cutter response.

Or perhaps she doesn't want to hear how she should just suck it up and deal with it...especially when she's being told that by a MOG instead of a peer.

Question: do you, @jeull64, respect what YOUR son and his fiance say, what they want, how they live, etc? Or do you expect them to go along with what other people want to 'keep the peace'?

jeull64 · August 2013

You can paint me as this horrid person who is rude and disrespectful. I dont much care. Its not everyone here that feels that way, since I have gotten private messages saying that they agree with me, but its not worth being flamed to agree with me in public. Isnt that sad?

My son and DIL live their own lives, and I am very proud of them for it. I raised a strong willed young man who would tell me to stuff it if he thought I was intruding. I am not trying to live through them or trying to have them conform to my standards. To assume otherwise is well, an assumption. How southernbelle is being treated isnt right, I havent ever said I agreed. What I said was, really, is it worth this? I dont think it is, but thats MY OPINION.

When I asked what she expected the outcome to be, its because I really dont think that there has been any thought put into it.

Here is the thing, for voicing my opinion I have been harassed and flamed. I have gotten NASTY messages and been attacked here. I have been accused of not being equal to a bride, but "just a mother of the groom".

Its not really what I thought this whole site was about, and thats really a sad thing.

I am done. You broke another one who disagreed. Congrats, your nastiness has made it a simple choice to log off and not come back.

southernbelle0915 · August 2013

jeull64 said:

So, when asked a serious question the OP runs off. Exactly as was expected. There isnt an answer that can be provided.

Time to walk away from this topic completely, she isnt interested in anything other than getting a cookie cutter response.

You asked me questions to try and bait me into engaging with you. Quite honestly, why would I answer a personal question from someone who told me I was "whiny", "childish", "immature", "a drama queen", and need to "remove myself from the gene pool"?

Sorry, but I won't.

NYCBruin · August 2013

I don't understand why the request to be called by the correct name is ridiculous. If the relationship is going to be "ended" because of this, it would be the in-laws fault anyways. If they want to continue a relationship with their son and daughter-in-law they should give them both the respect they deserve. At bare minimum this requires calling them their proper names.

Jells, you keep saying "it's just a name" and "it's not such a big deal." EXACTLY. Why is it that hard for the in-laws to use her actual name? Even if S-Belles husband gave them an ultimatum of "call her by her actual name or you won't be seeing much of us" it would be ridiculous of the IN-LAWS to think that choosing to call her the wrong name mattered more than their relationship with s-belle and her husband.

In my not-so-humble opinion, anyone who doesn't respect my FI enough to call him by his correct name is not someone I would care to continue a relationship with anyways. He comes first. That part of the whole marriage thing.

+misslisa · August 2013

jeull64 said:

I am done. You broke another one who disagreed. Congrats, your nastiness has made it a simple choice to log off and not come back.

You said that in your last post, too.

southernbelle0915 · August 2013

jeull64 said:

You can paint me as this horrid person who is rude and disrespectful. No one has or needs to paint this picture - people can just go back and read your posts and come to their own conclusions. I dont much care. Its not everyone here that feels that way, since I have gotten private messages saying that they agree with me, but its not worth being flamed to agree with me in public. Isnt that sad?

My son and DIL live their own lives, and I am very proud of them for it. I raised a strong willed young man who would tell me to stuff it if he thought I was intruding. Wow - that's exactly what my husband is doing except in a MUCH more mature way than "stuff it". Yet in previous posts you called the decision to address this"childish" "immature" and "dramatic". So your son would be strong willed for this, but my husband is childish, immature and dramatic? I am not trying to live through them or trying to have them conform to my standards. To assume otherwise is well, an assumption. How southernbelle is being treated isnt right, I havent ever said I agreed. What I said was, really, is it worth this? What is "this"? And no, what you said was that my husband and I are "childish, dramatic, immature and should remove ourselves from the gene pool". Any literate person can go back and see what you said, so changing your tune now isn't going to work. Sorry. I dont think it is, but thats MY OPINION.

When I asked what she expected the outcome to be, its because I really dont think that there has been any thought put into it.

Here is the thing, for voicing my opinion I have been harassed and flamed. No, you were called out for making personal attacks and name calling - and not just by community members, but by The Knot itself. I have gotten NASTY messages and been attacked here. I have been accused of not being equal to a bride, but "just a mother of the groom". Many of us aren't brides. I've made it pretty damned obvious that I'm not. Unless that accusation happened in a PM, this is another dramatic fantasy in your own head that didn't happen. Go find me a quote where someone said that.

Its not really what I thought this whole site was about, and thats really a sad thing. What DID you think? That you could prance onto an internet forum, spew venom and insults and people would think it's all rainbows and unicorns. Yea, no. Why don't you go back and look at how many other posters simply said, "I don't think it's a big deal." Now read others' reactions to them - either people didn't respond or they simply stated the opposing opinion. No hard feelings and the only person painting themselves as a martyr going down in flames is you. Responses to YOUR posts were different because of the way YOU acted and the things that YOU said.

I am done. You broke another one who disagreed. Congrats, your nastiness has made it a simple choice to log off and not come back.

FTR.

NerdyLucy · August 2013

@SouthernBelle0915

Oh, there you go...being all logical and stuff...

They knew and they did it anyway...

Re: They knew and they did it anyway...

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