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Etiquette for small ceremony and reception! Need help!

futuremrskg00futuremrskg00 member
10 Comments
in Wedding Etiquette Forum
My fiance and I have decided to have a small ceremony on the beach and then we are paying for dinner at a restaurant for our guests. I am wondering if I should still have a bridal shower because there will a lot of people that would come to the shower that won't be invited to the wedding but I would still like to celebrate and see all of my family and friends. Also, should we expect gifts? We don't care either way but we have registries already from when we thought we were going all out on a big ceremony and reception. 
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Re: Etiquette for small ceremony and reception! Need help!

  • ShesSoColdShesSoCold mod
    Moderator 5000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its
    Ditto scribe. Plus, you don't throw your own shower. You only have one if someone offers to throw it for you. PLEASE do not invite anyone not invited to the actual wedding.
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  • RebeccaB88RebeccaB88 member
    2500 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Anyone invited to the shower must also be invited to the wedding and reception.
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  • OliveOilsMomOliveOilsMom member
    Tenth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    futuremrskg00 said:
    My fiance and I have decided to have a small ceremony on the beach and then we are paying for dinner at a restaurant for our guests. I am wondering if I should still have a bridal shower because there will a lot of people that would come to the shower that won't be invited to the wedding but I would still like to celebrate and see all of my family and friends. Also, should we expect gifts? We don't care either way but we have registries already from when we thought we were going all out on a big ceremony and reception. 
    The only people you can invite to a shower, if someone offers to throw you one, are the people you are inviting to your ceremony.
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  • futuremrskg00futuremrskg00 member
    10 Comments
    I'm not throwing my own shower. My friend offered to throw one for me but I was not sure what to tell her after we decided to have a small ceremony and reception. 
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  • Coghoot12Coghoot12 member
    100 Comments Second Anniversary 5 Love Its
    futuremrskg00 said:

    I'm not throwing my own shower. My friend offered to throw one for me but I was not sure what to tell her after we decided to have a small ceremony and reception. 

    Is your friend invited to the wedding?

    If she wants to host a shower that's fine but the only guests should be also invited to the wedding.

    An invite to a shower is not a consolation prize for not being invited to the wedding. Showers are designed to be gift giving events. To invite someone to a shower and not the wedding says they are good enough to give you a gift but not good enough to see you get married.

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  • misssunshine17misssunshine17 member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 5 Answers
    Since a shower is a PRE wedding event, only people invited to the actual event can be invited. It's really tacky to do otherwise. Have a fabulous small shower! 
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  • futuremrskg00futuremrskg00 member
    10 Comments
    The friend is going to the wedding. Thank you for answering the question! She still wants to throw a bridal shower but it will be small. Also, where do you guys find the countdowns on the knot? They are all really cute!
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  • tammym1001tammym1001 member
    500 Love Its 1000 Comments Second Anniversary 5 Answers
    We are only having 30 guests at our wedding. My MOH is throwing me a shower. There will be 12 women there including myself. It will be at a winery and a nice afternoon where we can chat and visit with each other and have a good time. I think it will be lovely with only 12 people and actually prefer that over having a ton of people that I hardly know watching me open all their presents for hours.
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  • futuremrskg00futuremrskg00 member
    10 Comments
    edited August 2013
    I would prefer a small shower too. I don't enjoy big crowds and I really don't like being the center of those crowds!


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