Planning an immediate family-only wedding ceremony (24 guests) followed by an elegant catered dinner, all at my parents lovely home. Prefer tiny guest list as i hate being center of attention, plus we both have very frail grandparents who would not survive a big too-doo. Bridal gown, small cake, guitarist, very intimate and low key. So....this dinner following the ceremony is the actual reception, in my minds eye. The next day we are planning a casual backyard party for 130 guests, mostly our friends. No bridal gown, no wedding cake, no wedding activities. Live music, outdoor games, lots of food, kegs of craft beer, wine, margaritas. This is a party, not a wedding reception. Please tell me this passes the etiquette test!