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July 2014 Weddings
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Newbie, and I'm not sure if I belong.

Portia&RaymondPortia&Raymond member
First Comment
edited September 2013 in July 2014 Weddings
My husband and I had a court house wedding that only my sister, parents, and best friend even saw. No reception followed. We are coming up on 5 years of marriage, have had three children, and have suffered the loss of our youngest. He just ended his service in the military and this is really the first year we have ever been able to go more than two months before he is taken away for this or that, and the first year we will actually be together for an anniversary.
With us being back home, we wanted to have a small ceremony and reception where we renew our vows in front of friends and family we wished could have been there, honor our daughter who we had to say goodbye to last year, and look at it all as a start to a new life, trying to face things with our heads up, determined to get through our life with renewed courage.
I know the whole vow renewal thing is a bit of a controversy, but it's something that means a great deal to us, so I hope I will still be welcomed. :)
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Re: Newbie, and I'm not sure if I belong.

  • 88beautymarked88beautymarked member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment Name Dropper
    I see no problem with it. As long as you feel it in your heart, don't listen to snarkiness that tells you otherwise.

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  • CrystaH11CrystaH11 member
    First Answer First Anniversary Name Dropper 5 Love Its
    There is no problems with vow renewal. A lot of knotties will just tell you that you can't wear the big white dress, ask for gifts, have "first dances," etc.

    However, I say if if makes you guys happy, do it, just maybe wear a less ball-gowny dress.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
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  • Portia&RaymondPortia&Raymond member
    First Comment
    edited September 2013
    Well, the big dress or gifts weren't in the plan even with how I pictured my actual wedding. Like I said in my OP, it's just going to be a small ceremony. Bohemian inspired. If people insist on gifts, I'll suggest they donate to a SIDS foundation in honor of our daughter.
    The dancing however, we were planning on doing something of that nature at the reception. Not a 'first dance' exactly, but still, I can see my family insisting we dance at least one song alone together, and then things would continue as normal. Because, yes, in the end, it's as if we are essentially starting our lives together a-new, and since we never had either of these things, I'm sure there are a few traditional wedding things we would very much like to experience.
    :)
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  • photokittyphotokitty mod
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    I'm lurking from the July 2013 board and have to say how touched I am at your suggestion, if asked, to donate in honor of your daughter to a SIDS foundation. If you decided to have a favor you could do this instead. 
    I think a vow renewal on year 5 calls for a dance - it's not a first dance, but an anniversary dance. And if I was a guest I'd want to see you two dance :-) The girls on the general board flame the first dance at PPD (pretty princess day), but that's not what this is.
    GL! And congrats on 5 years of marriage!
    :kiss: ~xoxo~ :kiss:

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  • Cooleygirl26Cooleygirl26 member
    First Comment First Anniversary
    edited September 2013
    That's a great Idea. You and your Husband have when through some touch milestones and stuck it out. Loosing your daughter much have been very hard. You should have a vow renewal. I also love the idea that the above wife stated about a donation in honor of your daughter.

    Me and my DH only had a City Hall ceremony with a few people in attendance we are coming up on 10 years and we plan to do something small and intimate in our backyard family and friends.


    Good Luck on everything.And Congratulations!!


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  • jaime85120jaime85120 member
    First Anniversary Combo Breaker 5 Love Its First Comment
    Welcome to the board!!!! My 2 cents is do whatever you want from the biggest ball gown to the blingiest center pieces 5 years is tough enough nowadays and your family has had its up and downs. Celebrate how ever you want! Ps thank your husband for his service
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  • jravennajravenna member
    Name Dropper 5 Love Its First Anniversary First Comment
    ^ This. Completely. You deserve whatever party you and your husband want to plan. So go for it, and you are MORE than welcome on this board. <3 And I agree wholeheartedly with jaime -- please thank your husband for us. We are a grateful nation.
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  • BemyselfandiBemyselfandi member
    Name Dropper First Anniversary First Comment
    We did a quick "courthouse" type wedding in November last year for insurance purposes. We already have two kids, we were planning on getting married anyways, but we needed to have it done now so we both had insurance. We are planning our wedding July 26. It's exciting for us, and it's what we are looking at as our "real" wedding.

    You have had a rough year. I'm so sorry for your loss. Enjoy your planning and keep your heads up! Weddings are to celebrate the amazing relationship you two have, and the strength you have gained the last five years!
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  • KrisMarie123KrisMarie123 member
    First Comment First Anniversary
    You are absolutely welcome! <3<3
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  • Drewsgirl31Drewsgirl31 member
    5 Love Its First Comment Name Dropper First Anniversary
    Hey ladies! I may officially be joining you shortly, our 5th wedding anniversary is June 2014 but the venue I really want is only available July 12! We also had a court house wedding when he was planning on joining the military. Our big wedding was pushed off due to a number of factors so were planning a *big day* for our 5th! Thank you all for the kind remarks to the OP it's really sad to see the snarky remarks pertaining to couples wanting to have their chance at a big day. Congrats to all of you and I hope I'll be welcomed just as openly if we get the July date ❤️
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  • hlvonbhlvonb member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Answer First Comment
    Portia&Raymond said:
    My husband and I had a court house wedding that only my sister, parents, and best friend even saw. No reception followed. We are coming up on 5 years of marriage, have had three children, and have suffered the loss of our youngest. He just ended his service in the military and this is really the first year we have ever been able to go more than two months before he is taken away for this or that, and the first year we will actually be together for an anniversary.
    With us being back home, we wanted to have a small ceremony and reception where we renew our vows in front of friends and family we wished could have been there, honor our daughter who we had to say goodbye to last year, and look at it all as a start to a new life, trying to face things with our heads up, determined to get through our life with renewed courage.
    I know the whole vow renewal thing is a bit of a controversy, but it's something that means a great deal to us, so I hope I will still be welcomed. :)

    @Portia&amp;Raymond

    I think the vow renewal is perfect for you both and to honor you child. I say go for it! And you belong where ever you want to be :)

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