Wedding Etiquette Forum

NER - BM gift cards?

I am starting to think about bridesmaid gifts. I just have my two sisters as BM. My best friend is a reader, I'd like to get her something nice as well. Is it impersonal to get a gift card if its to a store you personally love? Would you rather receive a "physical" gift? I have ideas for both, but not sure what would be best. The actual physical gift is something they would never buy themselves but I think they'd really like. The giftcard is for a store they both obsess over, but its nothing sentimental or such. Thoughts?

Re: NER - BM gift cards?

  • Sounds like a great gift to me. Don't forget to write a personal note of thanks.
  • I am also toying with the idea of doing a combo physical gift/gift card so I hope more people (especially those with experience) add their imput!
  • I think gift cards are great. Then they get to pick out what they really want/need (hopefully want :) ). You could include a coffee mug or something small, but honesty, I vote for funneling the whole gift budget into those gift cards.
  • Gift cards are fine.  As long as you give them a card with something nice and heartfelt written from you on the inside.
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  • I think gift cards can be really thoughtful - just make sure it's a store they love and would get something for themselves, which is what is seems you are doing. Ditto to the handwritten note as well. 

    If you are torn between the two, ask yourself: what would I get for their birthday? Shop for them like its their birthdays and you will not disappoint. 
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  • They aren't rude, but I really hate gift cards. They always feel thoughtless and impersonal, and they're a pain to use. You give me a $50 gift card. I buy something for $44.67. Then what? I either wind up buying something more expensive that I didn't really need, of just lose that value.
  • I'm with @starmoon44 on this one.  I very rarely buy gift cards for people and I don't like receiving them. Instead of getting a present from you, I have to spend my time going shopping and finding something to buy with the gift card that you got me. That really just saves you time and inconveniences me. If there is a physical present that you think they would like I would get that instead.
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  • I think it's a "know your crowd" kind of deal. I think the majority of people would be pumped about a giftcard. But for me, I only have a few close girlfriends and don't think I'll get to be a BM more than once or twice. I'd prefer a physical item (that fits my tastes/interests) so I'd have a memento of the day. Then again, I know lots of women who have been BMs so many times it loses all meaning. Either way, sounds like you're a thoughtful bride who will get them something they'll love!
  • We actually do get each other gift cards sometimes for birthdays and Christmas, so I know it's something they like to receive. I am thinking though that it seems too impersonal for this occasion. Especially since I am a gift card giver. It may mean more to receive an actual "gift" from me. I will definitely write a note from the heart as suggested. Thanks all!
  • I don't think there's anything wrong with giving them a gift card since that's something that you tend to gift them for other events. That being said, maybe you want to do something a little more special for your wedding?

    I gave my BMs each a picture frame and either a bottle of wine or some really good beer. We all tend to go wine tasting and beer tasting together, go to wine festivals, etc. The booze was picked out specifically to suit each one's tastes. They all thought it was fantastic, though I'm sure some people might say that wine/beer is too impersonal. 
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  • I'd rather a gift card than a cheesy robe with my initials on it for one rushed picture as we are getting ready in the morning.  I'm torn about what to get my bridesmaids too.  I feel gift cards aren't special enough but I would get one for their birthday, so who knows.

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