Wedding Party

Older Flower Girl

Upon hearing about our engagement, my fiance's 13 year old cousin was very excited and the first thing she asked him is if she could be the flower girl. I know I can make it happen and make everything look classy. But should I make her a JBM instead? I currently have 4 BM and my fiance only wants 4 GM, so she would make number 5, which could have her walking by herself anyway. Any suggestions?

Re: Older Flower Girl

  • If she wants to be a flower girl, I see no problem with it. That being said, I'd leave her the option also of being a BM (no need for junior, all BMs have to do is show up in the dress). Basically, let her do what she's comfortable with.
  • If she wants to be a flower girl, I see no problem with it. That being said, I'd leave her the option also of being a BM (no need for junior, all BMs have to do is show up in the dress). Basically, let her do what she's comfortable with.
    I agree with this completely.  I would have her wear either the same dress or a very similar dress to the rest of your BM and then let her decide as the time gets closer if she would rather be a flower girl or BM.

  • As long as it's a role she WANTS to be in, I see absolutely no issue with her being a flower girl. You could present the bridesmaid idea to her (if that's what you want) and gauge her reaction. In summary, if you want her in the wedding and you don't care what role she's in, let her choose.
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  • And don't NOT present the idea of bridesmaid to her just because you want to keep the sides even. It's completely fine for you to have 5 and him to have 4.
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  • It sounds like she wants to be and is excited about being a flower girl.  Why not just let her be one? 
    Also, about the BMs vs. GMs, don't try to have even sides.
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  •  I currently have 4 BM and my fiance only wants 4 GM, so she would make number 5, which could have her walking by herself anyway. Any suggestions?

    Have one of your FI's GM walk with a BM on both arms. That's totally normal. And, he'll feel rather studly.

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  • TeddiD34 said:

     I currently have 4 BM and my fiance only wants 4 GM, so she would make number 5, which could have her walking by herself anyway. Any suggestions?

    Have one of your FI's GM walk with a BM on both arms. That's totally normal. And, he'll feel rather studly.

    Even as a bridesmaid she could walk alone, all of the bridesmaids could walk alone for that matter.  And no man should feel "studly" with a 13 year old on his arm.
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  • There is no need for "even" sides.  She can be a bridesmaid.  She does not need to be paired off with anyone, and for that matter, neither do the other bridesmaids.
  • if she is all for being the flower girl, let her be that.  Just have the dress be suitable for her age.  There is no rule that the FG needs to be a certain age.  While its common for it to be younger, its fine to have someone older. 
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  • A junior bridesmaid doesn't need anyone to walk with her.  Actually, for my religion the honor attendants walk alone anyway. Our 2 flower girls are going together and our 2 ring bearers are going together (the older is actually pulling the younger in a wagon); the junior bm, moh, and bm are all walking alone down the isle. :-)  Also, it doens't have to be 100% even. A jbm is common.

    I'd give her an option and put her in a dress similar to which ever she chooses.  She might LOVE the idea of a flower girl because she's never heard of a junior brides maid, and that honor might seem a more appealing to her.  Give her the choice and don't worry about even numbers. :-)
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