Wedding two weeks before Thanksgiving?

CallaLily25 · November 2013

Help settle a "debate" between me and FI's family, haha

Would you side-eye or not attend a wedding two weeks before Thanksgiving? (i.e. Thanksgiving is Thurs., Nov 27th, Wedding is Sat., Nov. 15).

sandrabrooke · November 2013

I really wouldn't side eye it. Because people are coming for Thanksgiving, they might not come to the wedding. But on the other hand, I have a December 7th wedding and we have people who would normally come for Christmas coming early. It really depends.

Ultimately, 2 weeks before thanksgiving is not an issue to me. Are there no weddings 2 weeks before 4th of July or Labor day?

doeydo · November 2013

No. It's a whole two weeks away. What, are people supposed to choose a holiday-less month?

phira · November 2013

I'm getting married the same weekend (on the 16th). We're going to send save-the-dates ahead of time so that people can figure out their plans.

bethsmiles · November 2013

I wouldn't side-eye it but some OOT guests might decline because they are already traveling for Thanksgiving and can't get more time off or afford another trip right around the same time. No matter what day you pick you won't be able to please everyone so I think it really depends on your guest list. If 90% of your guests are OOT I don't think it would be such a great idea, if 90% of your guests won't be traveling it shouldn't be an issue.

My SO's good friend is getting married the Saturday after Thanksgiving which is way more inconvenient than two weeks before. I already wasn't planning on visiting family for Thanksgiving but if I had been I'd have to skip his wedding.

jenfromjersey · November 2013

We are getting married on the 23rd of this year, and no one side eyed it. Either they are coming or they aren't.

Viczaesar · November 2013

I wouldn't side eye it but I, personally, probably wouldn't be able to attend unless it were in the same town in which I live. My big annual conference is always the weekend before Thanksgiving.

StephJean83 · November 2013

We're getting married that same weekend, on the 15th and our wedding, though in the same state we live in, is OOT for EVERY SINGLE GUEST. I say that, as in everyone, including us, have to drive at least an hour to the venue. We have talked to a lot of our guests, we are inviting around 300 people and so far we haven't had any push back. The only question we have had is if the wedding would interfere with hunting, which it doesn't.

We are also sending out STDs soon so everyone can plan and decide if they want/can/able to come or if it too close to Thanksgiving for them. My sister and her family live in southern Alabama and they are planning to do Thanksgiving early with her inlaws when they are up for our wedding.

dramamonkey · November 2013

We're getting married on 11/24 this year (the Sunday before Thanksgiving), and we've got more than 100 people attending of 150 invited. Most of our declines were FI's family who are wayyyyy out of town, and therefore wouldn't have come on ANY date.

Two weeks before is PLENTY of time.

KeptInStitches · November 2013

Two weeks' separation is more than enough.

OjitosVerdes · November 2013

I wouldn't side-eye it, but that might be due to our own decision. Our wedding is 11/16 and Thanksgiving is 11/28. We knew that not everyone would make it, and our attrition rate was about 40%.

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I feel like it's not inconsiderately too close to a holiday, but is close enough that there are quite a few people that might now make it.

lovesclimbing · November 2013

Wouldn't side eye and would likely attend if I could afford it.

climbingsingle · November 2013

I'd have no problem attending a wedding two weeks before Thanksgiving. I wouldn't side-eye it at all.

itzMS · November 2013

No side-eyes. I've attended weddings then, and also in the weeks preceding Christmas.

Just make sure that your VIPs are able to make it (bridal party and your immediate families).

emmyg65 · November 2013

I wouldn't side-eye it and would attend.

kmmssg · November 2013

CallaLily25 said:

Help settle a "debate" between me and FI's family, haha

Would you side-eye or not attend a wedding two weeks before Thanksgiving? (i.e. Thanksgiving is Thurs., Nov 27th, Wedding is Sat., Nov. 15).

As long as it was local it would be no problem. If this was being held in a place where I have to travel and stay for Thanksgiving to see my family, I probably wouldn't make both trips and Thanksgiving would trump your wedding. If I could drive it in less than say 6 or 7 hours, I'd probably go.

@StephJean83 Now...I live in Michigan. November 15th is the opening day of firearms deer hunting season and it is like a national holiday around here. TONS of schools are closed that day! Part of that is so the older kids can hunt with their family, but I think a huge reason is to keep the rural/country kids away from the bus stops as the sun is coming up.

I know literally a couple dozen guys would would flip their lids if they had to go to a wedding on the 15th of November. Opening day is prime hunting because the deer aren't too spooked yet. After opening day, they are far more skiddish than usual. In all the commands where I worked, I never asked for leave during that time frame because I'm not a hunter and so many of the guys (and some of the females) I worked with were. On a 1 - 10 scale it held huge value to them, but to me, not so much - I could take leave later.

CTYankeeBride · November 2013

I may be biased because we're getting married November 14 2014 but I wouldn't side-eye a wedding 2 weeks before a holiday at all. We made sure that anyone we're planning on asking to be in our bridal party and our immediate families will not have an issue traveling or attending, and we'll send save-the-dates in April/ May.

This year, we went to a wedding the Sunday of Memorial Day weekend, a wedding on the 4th of July and we have another one the Saturday after Thanksgiving. All of them required travel, and we made it work. You may have some guests that just can't travel for both and as long as you're prepared for that and won't take it personally you'll be fine.

StephJean83 · November 2013

@kmmssg, in Wisconsin opening weekend is the weekend before Thanksgiving(November 22, 2014) and last 10 days. My FH is a hunter as is most of his uncles, aunts and cousins, and my dad and BIL. The weekend of the 15th is the last of bow season, but that is a month plus long season and we cleared the date with those who are bow hunters.

kmmssg · November 2013

StephJean83 said:

@kmmssg, in Wisconsin opening weekend is the weekend before Thanksgiving(November 22, 2014) and last 10 days. My FH is a hunter as is most of his uncles, aunts and cousins, and my dad and BIL. The weekend of the 15th is the last of bow season, but that is a month plus long season and we cleared the date with those who are bow hunters.

I wondered where you were from. Our bow season is the entire month of October, black powder is the first 14 days of November, and then firearms season is November 15-30th. Sounds like you are all set!

StephJean83 · November 2013

kmmssg said:

StephJean83 said:

@kmmssg, in Wisconsin opening weekend is the weekend before Thanksgiving(November 22, 2014) and last 10 days. My FH is a hunter as is most of his uncles, aunts and cousins, and my dad and BIL. The weekend of the 15th is the last of bow season, but that is a month plus long season and we cleared the date with those who are bow hunters.

I wondered where you were from. Our bow season is the entire month of October, black powder is the first 14 days of November, and then firearms season is November 15-30th. Sounds like you are all set!

Yup. I know every year they try to expand the season but they want it to go longer vs starting earlier.

labro · November 2013

My sister is getting married the weekend before Thanksgiving this year. I don't see how two weeks before could be a problem at all...what are you supposed to do? Find a date that isn't within a whole month of ANY holiday? FWIW, she invited 180 people and 160 are attending. Most of the declines occurred because one of our cousins got married last month and his siblings (with their SO's) travelled to his destination wedding so none of them were expected to come anyway. The rest were family members who live overseas or OOT familywho just moved to a new job and didn't have any vacation time to take to travel.

PrettyGirlLost · November 2013

kmmssg said:

CallaLily25 said:

Help settle a "debate" between me and FI's family, haha

Would you side-eye or not attend a wedding two weeks before Thanksgiving? (i.e. Thanksgiving is Thurs., Nov 27th, Wedding is Sat., Nov. 15).

As long as it was local it would be no problem. If this was being held in a place where I have to travel and stay for Thanksgiving to see my family, I probably wouldn't make both trips and Thanksgiving would trump your wedding. If I could drive it in less than say 6 or 7 hours, I'd probably go.

I wouldn't side eye it, but I'd have to decline as I have an annual convention that weekend every year. If I didn't have the convention and your wedding was local or within a 4 hour drive, I would attend. If it was OOT I may have to decline depending on whether or not I was spending Thanksgiving with FI's family OOT that year. . . we alternate.

wrigleyville · November 2013

We travel for Thanksgiving every year. The dates wouldn't overlap, but it might cause issues with our budget. It would really just depend on where it was and who it was.

ktjanesmom · November 2013

Two weeks or even one week I would not side eye it! But thats just me. Im easy going.

delujm0 · November 2013

I wouldn't personally side-eye it...i am in a wedding 12/14 this year which is literally directly between Thanksgiving and Christmas, and it's a DW, so we will have to travel for Thanksgiving and Christmas to see our families, and also this wedding. We had to adjust our time off from work to accomodate it, but these are our closest friends so we will of course be there (also, our families are also close and will be there as well...so it's kind of like an extra holiday). Also, the travel is cheaper that week in Dec than it would be in the spring, so we definitely appreciated that.

That having been said, plenty of people didn't care for the date and wish it was another time. Some of them are going anyway, and others just declined. If you're concerned about declines, just make sure that your VIPs are ok with the date, and then proceed. You can't predict what every single one of your guests will do.

cowgirl8238 · November 2013

I wouldn't side-eye this at all! As most PP's have already mentioned as long as the VIPs can make it and you don't have too many OOTer's you should be fine.

photokitty · November 2013

I would attend. I was in a wedding a week and a half before Xmas.

Ven&Radio · November 2013

I wouldn't side-eye it. Whatever date you choose, someone isn't going to be able to make it (budget, conflicting plans, illness, etc), so I wouldn't sweat it too much.

southernbelle0915 · November 2013

I wouldn't side-eye this, but I might not attend.

DH's family lives on the other side of the country from where we live. We split holidays (this year it's Thanksgiving with his family and Christmas with my family). DH agreed to be a GM in a wedding on December 14th this year in his home town.

Since he agreed to be in the wedding without asking when or where it was and was not thinking about holiday logistics (this is typical of his personality), we are skipping Thanksgiving with his family. His family is upset, but it's simply not feasible for us to fly across the country twice in two weeks. If he weren't a GM, we'd be skipping the wedding all together.

What I'm saying is that if you have any out of town guests who may be traveling for the wedding in addition to traveling for the holidays, they may decline simply because of money and logistics.

CallaLily25 · November 2013

Thank you for all of the opinions!

We did check with our VIPs, so I feel much better now.

tammym1001 · November 2013

It wouldn't bother me at all even if I had to travel to the wedding, but I don't travel on any of the holidays and I like any excuse I can to get away for a couple of days

Wedding two weeks before Thanksgiving?

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