I have a HUGE dilemma. My fiancé and I are planning a very small (12-15 people) destination wedding and then having a big reception back at home. We already had our wedding party worked out (but not asked yet) when last night my sister said to my mom 'I hope she doesn't plan on having short bridesmaid dresses' with the assumption that she is going to be in the wedding party. I did not plan on asking her. We are not close, we fight all of the time, and every time we go somewhere she whines and complains that she wants to go home until she makes us all so miserable that we have to leave. It's gotten so bad that I don't even invite her anywhere because I know she is going to ruin the night. She also refuses to help anyone out and I know I won't be able to depend on her for anything.
Not to pull a total bridezilla moment, but I had already decided on a really cute, short, satin dress style knowing that my three bridesmaid are all thin and would look gorgeous in it. My sister is VERY large and refuses to wear dresses. She may make an exception for my wedding, but it would be long, with sleeves, and just wouldn't match anything at all.
I don't want to hurt her feelings but I can't emphasize enough how I feel like she would just be a completely miserable bridesmaid and ruin my day. Is it tacky to ask her to be an honorary bridesmaid and maybe do a reading? My brother will be the one walking me down the aisle.
Any suggestions on how to put it nicely? What other parts of the ceremony/reception can I ask her to be a part of?