I think it is very inappropriate to have a shower after the wedding. That ship has sailed! Part of the fun of a shower is the build up to the big day. I would think it is VERY gift grabby to have one after the wedding. It seems like you are saying to your guests "Your wedding gift wasn't enough and we didn't get what we want so everyone try again"(I'm sure that wasn't your intention). If I were you, I would pick a day before the wedding, and invite whomever- those that are OOT might decline, but that is being a grown up. Or else decline the shower all together.
Re: Bridal Shower AFTER Wedding