How much should I spend on Bridesmaids gifts

Viczaesar · August 2013

Many, many people don't like monogrammed items.

sdove13 · August 2013

I too have been struggling with what to get my BM!!!

But I think someone may have said this but check out these sites they have alot of creative and cute things!

www.etsy.com

www.evesaddiction.com

www.wish.com

www.wanelo.com

afowler08 · August 2013

I agree with this as well. I too, picked dresses that were about $150. And, don't forget about the other costs they have spent to be in your wedding- hair, makeup, nails, shoes, bachelorette party, shower, etc. I am spending about the cost of their dress on each of my 5 girls.

mimiphin · August 2013

I think that for me,a past bridesmaid and future bride, its more the thought that counts than the amount spent. If your just going to grab something from the dollar store- not cool. I think I am spending about $75-100 on my girls.

lonnamoshier · December 2013

ceh789 said:

So I'm going to be crass and attach a dollar figure here. I think you should spend at least what they paid for their dress.

So I am confused on this. Do you mean spend at least what they spent per girl or total? As in, 5 girls spent $100 on a dress; at least a $20 gift or do you mean $100 each? The latter is crazy.

lonnamoshier · December 2013

I've seen a lot of comments on here talking about how getting a gift for your BMs to wear to your wedding is "selfish" but what if it is useful afterward?? For example, my wedding is rustic americana themed so navy and pops of red. I wanted to get my girls (among other small gifts) a pair of these red TOMS http://www.toms.com/red-canvas-classics-shoes-1/s I am positive that everyone in my party loves how comfy they are and would use them afterward. Also, they are more sanitary (and cuter in my opinion) than flip flops and donate a pair of shoes to a child in need. To me, that is like a win-win-win but is this "selfish" and I just don't see it?

manateehugger · December 2013

@lonnamoshier

I think it still is selfish. You're getting them the shoes because you want them to wear them at your wedding, not because you want to get them TOMS. If it's part of their uniform, it's still a gift for yourself. Not to mention, a personalized gift would be more appreciated by all of them, I'm sure.

They don't need the shoes. No one will care what they wear on their feet.

jneen101 · December 2013

lonnamoshier said:

ceh789 said:

So I'm going to be crass and attach a dollar figure here. I think you should spend at least what they paid for their dress.

So I am confused on this. Do you mean spend at least what they spent per girl or total? As in, 5 girls spent $100 on a dress; at least a $20 gift or do you mean $100 each? The latter is crazy.

I don't think it's crazy to spend $100 on a nice gift for someone who is obviously very close to you if you asked her to be in your wedding. Isn't the point of the gift to say thank you for taking the time to be with me on this important day, I appreciate you, love you etc? I think $100 buys a nice, thoughtful gift. What can I really get with 20 bucks that says thanks, you are so important to me? I understand those who are saying that people don't expect to be reimbursed for the cost of the dress when they are in a wedding, and I am not saying that you have to spend the same amount they spend on the dress, but I agree with others that you should kind of consider the time and money they are putting into being a part of your wedding. These people are important to you.

lday998 · December 2013

While I don't know if you should have to put a $ amount on it by dress costs, I wouldn't say getting them gift items that they will probably only use at YOUR wedding is really appropriate. When I was a maid of honor, we did get monogrammed totes, a nice frame with pictures of us with the bride, survival kits and a few other small items. I thought it was nice and never thought about it twice.

However, now that it's my turn, I'm going a little bigger. I have one girl who will have to fly to get to the wedding, one is in vet school and perpetually poor, one is helping me do all the flowers for the wedding, and a maid of honor who has come from four hours away for multiple "wedding planning" weekends (never requested of her, just wanted to come when she knew I was dress shopping, to a wedding show, etc.). So although I know price really doesn't matter to any of them, they deserve something nice and heartfelt. I don't think you can give them something like that for $25.

I'm going to do one big item and several small fun/gag/homemade/sentimental gifts. I'm not doing a tote bag they'll never use again (I never did). For the maid of honor, I'm thinking of having an oil painting of her beloved horses done. For the future vet, a stethoscope or nice lab coat with her name embroidered on it. I may pay for their mani-pedis, depending on how much the real gift costs. If not, I won't make them get their nails done (no wedding pictures will show their nails up close, only mine). I'm not asking them to wear particular shoes, jewelry, or have their hair done as some of them have short hair. I have 5 girls, so it will be pricey, but like others have said, I chose to have 5 bridesmaids and they're spending a lot of money and time on my day, so they deserve it too.

P.S. The same goes for your mother and mother-in-law if they're as involved as mine are.

Save money some other way. We're having a smaller wedding and making our own flowers and invitations.

kgd7357 · December 2013

I plan to spend about $150/BM. I'm giving them the option (not required) of having their hair and makeup done the day of on me, which will come out of that budget if they'd like those things. Then the rest will be spent on personal gifts for each one. So each BM may get a gift anywhere between $30 and $150. I know it seems like a weird system, but I think it'll work decently. For example, my one BM will want both hair and makeup done and she is a big snowboarder (something we do together). I plan to get her new snowboarding mittens that cost about $40. I'll spend a total of $160 on her. One BM doesn't want either, but she is going on her honeymoon three weeks later. I'm getting her a $150 spa package at the resort she is staying at. It's also not like they will open gifts together.

BMoreBride6 · January 2014

this thread is from March 2012.

alexandrastengel · January 2014

This topic is so controversial (as you can see), as is everything when it comes to spending money. This can also lead into so many different tangents, and reasons, and excuses, and blah blah blah. I want to say that you should spend as much on each bridesmaid as they spent on their dress, but this is just really no-doable for most people.

As a bridesmaid, I think it's understood that you will be putting out more money than you are being given back, hence the "maid" part. You are to wait on the bride, pamper her, make her day go as easy as possible, be a best friend and buddy. One day (hopefully!), it will be your turn to do the same for them if you have not already.

I measure my friendships in love, not dollars. However I think it is fair to say that you shouldn't expect your bridesmaids to spend over $1000 each on your for your wedding, then give them a $15 necklace in return. That's just selfish

Therefore, my best answer is take a look on how much each girl spent on you. Then figure from there how much you think is appropriate to spend on them. For example, my girls will be spending about $450-$500 to be in my wedding. So, I am giving them each a $75 gift-- about $100 for the MOH.

But, that is MY decision! Do what YOU FEEL is best. If you want to spend as much on them as their dress, that is amazing if you can afford it. If not, try something less expensive that's thoughtful and that they will love.I am an awesome bargain shopper, so I have a knack for getting expensive things really cheap. Bottom line, do what YOU WANT. Do not feel obligated to spend a ton of money, but don't cheap out either.

Bottom line: There is no right or wrong answer to this question

KeptInStitches · January 2014

@knotporscha, this thread is really old - could you close it?

How much should I spend on Bridesmaids gifts

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