New Years Eve Wedding?

[Deleted User] · December 2013

My sister and her husband (AND their kids) have been invited to a wedding on New Year's Eve. The weird thing is that the couple wants to say their vows AT midnight. In order to accomplish this, they are having the dinner, drinks, dancing BEFORE the ceremony. The ceremony will start at 11:45. Is this a major WTF moment or am I just missing something? I feel like celebrating the wedding BEFORE the wedding is crazy. I also feel like a lot of people will be celebrating that won't get to see the reception. My sister and bro in law won't stay because they are bringing the kids and will have to have them in bed at a certain time.

photokitty · December 2013

I think it is fine. My only concern would be the bride & groom bring sober to say the vows ;-) i think it will be fun and memorable.

Rebl90 · December 2013

It's definitely not my cup of tea, I would be too tired and tipsy for the ceremony after the reception but it for sure would be memorable.

bethsmiles · December 2013

It is a little strange but it wouldn't really bother me. Although, if I'm invited to a wedding on New Year's Eve I think it needs to be one hell of a party if I'm missing out on other possible New Year's Eve plans for it.

jdluvr06 · December 2013

How fun! I think that would be fun. Their wedding will be memorable.

sarals24 · December 2013

I think that sounds awesome, actually. I have been to two NYE weddings, and it's pretty great...you have a place to go party that's basically free, with all your loved ones (if it's your family/friends) and a lot of times they have transportation set up to a hotel, so it's safe! Win win win!

Plus, it's pretty much guaranteed that your SO will never forget your anniversary...

phira · December 2013

I haaaaate New Year's weddings. Sorry folks; I will never shit on your wedding if that's the choice you make, but I really would prefer to either have a night in with my partner, or spend the evening with my closest friends, ringing in the new year. I guess I would have fun if it were somewhere I wouldn't have to drive/take the train home afterwards (like, if we could just stay at the hotel or something), and if my friends would be there anyway.

Anyway, aiming to say your vows at midnight is one of those things that sounds romantic and awesome, but is probably more trouble than it's worth.

kgd7357 · December 2013

I'd mostly be annoyed that the wedding was on a Tuesday. I have work until 5, so if it was out of town it would majorly be annoying. Although I don't really have a problem with the NYE concept. I don't think I could do vows at midnight though b/c I'm pretty sure it wouldn't be legal after 3 glasses of champagne...

lyndausvi · December 2013

I have no problem with the timeline. It actually sounds reasonable. Although I would have to wonder the legality if the couple themselves were drinking.

Would I like to attend? If it was a close friend or family member I wouldn't mind. I normally do not go out on NYE, so it better be on hell of a party. Full open bar, nice full dinner, great music, midnight snacks and free transportation.

On another note, the only way my kids would attend it if there were in their teens. No way I would bring someone younger.

emmyg65 · December 2013

This sounds fun. Having the reception before the ceremony is a nice way to let the bride and groom do what they want (say vows at midnight) while not keeping their guests up too, too late.

STARMOON44 · December 2013

I think it sounds really fun! Free NYE dinner is a pretty good deal in my book. If your sister wanted to stay she'd just need to get a sitter, or decline if she doesn't want to go, but I dont think this is a WTF moment at all.

orwhatuwill · December 2013

We are having a NYE wedding next week. Folks who can't make it due to it being a work day, have declined, much like folks that don't work a M-F job may have to for a weekend wedding. And, I'm assuming, that folks that would rather stay at home with their families or partners have also declined.

We're holding the ceremony & reception at hotel with a block of rooms and a second block of rooms near by.

Our ceremony will start at 7pm with everything following (cocktail hour, plated dinner, Music, NYE countdown, etc.). We talked about doing it right at midnight, but that felt WAAAAAAY too late for our families and us, truthfully.

I hope your sister's friends have fully investigated the legal implication of being married at 12:00am or after: namely which year they will be able to file jointly. After 12:00am, they will have to wait until the end of the new year to file.

orwhatuwill · December 2013

Re: the drinking and legality piece. That is an excellent point. Likely, someone could challenge the validity of the ceremony and signatures after too much drinking. Something for everyone who drinks before the ceremony (NYE or not) to think about!

climbingsingle · December 2013

Actually, I think it's a pretty fun idea.

MobKaz · December 2013

orwhatuwill said:

Re: the drinking and legality piece. That is an excellent point. Likely, someone could challenge the validity of the ceremony and signatures after too much drinking. Something for everyone who drinks before the ceremony (NYE or not) to think about!

The legal aspect regarding the wedding date is a good point. I'm not sure whether the drinking component has any bearing. This is not a spur of the moment wedding. They will have had to obtain the wedding license ahead of time (and in a sober mindset). I would hope they would limit their intake during their reception.

kgd7357 · December 2013

@orwhatuwil

I see your point on the Tuesday wedding, if you can't make it, you can't make it. I just wouldn't want to have that many guests left out, since we have about 80% out of town guests. If that's not a problem for the couple then great!

lyndausvi · December 2013

I know when my brother got married back in the 90's in AZ the priest made a point saying the marriage would not be valid if either one was had a drink. A good lawyer could get a marriage invalidated because they were under the influence.

orwhatuwill · December 2013

@kgd7357 definitely have to consider your guest list. And be considerate of any special conditions around the date(like for us, holding it in a place where folks did not need to drive unless they wished was a paramount concern).

We often hold NYE parties that many who will be coming have joined before. We invited 140 and will be hosting 95, I know we have some declines due to the date.

orwhatuwill · December 2013

For us, Our officiant asked us which day we wanted, given the paperwork would not be filed until the next day. We want it to be 12/31.

Lily9911 · December 2013

clairekundinger said:

My sister and her husband (AND their kids) have been invited to a wedding on New Year's Eve. The weird thing is that the couple wants to say their vows AT midnight. In order to accomplish this, they are having the dinner, drinks, dancing BEFORE the ceremony. The ceremony will start at 11:45. Is this a major WTF moment or am I just missing something? I feel like celebrating the wedding BEFORE the wedding is crazy. I also feel like a lot of people will be celebrating that won't get to see the reception. My sister and bro in law won't stay because they are bringing the kids and will have to have them in bed at a certain time.

What will their wedding date actually be? December 31st or Jan 1st? Or will they celebrate both days?

What if the officiant talks reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeally slow and they miss midnight?

Do they have to just kiss and be announced and get back to the ceremony after?

Or what if the exact opposite happens and everyone has to wait around until midnight for it to be over with?

What if the bride and groom realize they have had it with one another right before midnight and call the whole thing off?

Those are my only questions for you. But other than that I think the idea is cute and fun, I'd love to see how drunk they are before the ceremony.

Lowell14 · December 2013

mobkaz said:

orwhatuwill said:

Re: the drinking and legality piece. That is an excellent point. Likely, someone could challenge the validity of the ceremony and signatures after too much drinking. Something for everyone who drinks before the ceremony (NYE or not) to think about!

The legal aspect regarding the wedding date is a good point. I'm not sure whether the drinking component has any bearing. This is not a spur of the moment wedding. They will have had to obtain the wedding license ahead of time (and in a sober mindset). I would hope they would limit their intake during their reception.

Drinking could definitely change how people could look at the validity of the marriage or even a divorce/annulment. NYE, a few drinks and one person could say they were not in the right mind. Have fun proving otherwise...

huskypuppy14 · December 2013

leahjwatts said:

orwhatuwill said:

Re: the drinking and legality piece. That is an excellent point. Likely, someone could challenge the validity of the ceremony and signatures after too much drinking. Something for everyone who drinks before the ceremony (NYE or not) to think about!

The legal aspect regarding the wedding date is a good point. I'm not sure whether the drinking component has any bearing. This is not a spur of the moment wedding. They will have had to obtain the wedding license ahead of time (and in a sober mindset). I would hope they would limit their intake during their reception.
Drinking could definitely change how people could look at the validity of the marriage or even a divorce/annulment. NYE, a few drinks and one person could say they were not in the right mind. Have fun proving otherwise...

This could be the case for many weddings. I know plenty of bride and grooms that were drinking with their bridal party prior to the wedding.

JoanE2012 · December 2013

bethsmiles said:

It is a little strange but it wouldn't really bother me. Although, if I'm invited to a wedding on New Year's Eve I think it needs to be one hell of a party if I'm missing out on other possible New Year's Eve plans for it.

This. I would expect a kick-ass wedding if it were on New Year's Eve.

banana468 · December 2013

lyndausvi said:

I know when my brother got married back in the 90's in AZ the priest made a point saying the marriage would not be valid if either one was had a drink. A good lawyer could get a marriage invalidated because they were under the influence.

Interesting! When BIL tied the knot in 2009 their priest offered him, the GM and all the family men the option of Ouzo or Sambuca.

orwhatuwill · December 2013

What would make it extra "kick ass" over other weddings? I'm just interested to hear your thoughts. I'm pretty nervous!

Alexandrathgr8 · December 2013

I personally don't like the idea of having a wedding on NYE... i feel like the party needs to be more accentuated vs. the actual ceremony because of what the date is.. like pp said, it better be a kick-ass party..

lyndausvi · December 2013

orwhatuwill said:

What would make it extra "kick ass" over other weddings? I'm just interested to hear your thoughts. I'm pretty nervous!

Open bar not just beer and wine, prefer top shelf. Full meal, awesome entertainment for dancing. Some say band, I'm good with a great DJ. Snacks at midnight. Transportation to hotels (assuming it's not already in a hotel).

It might sound snobby, but I don't go out for NYE. It's amateur night. Watching 2 friends/family getting married alone is not enough incentive so-to-speak to bet me out with all the crazies. If I'm going to go out on NYE I want all the bells and whistles to make me forget I'm up way past my bedtime and have to go home with drunks out on the road.

BMoreBride6 · December 2013

I don't know, I guess I'm against the grain on this one but doing wedding related things before they are actually married seems weird to me. I wouldn't mind the dinner and dancing but first dance? cake cutting? toasts? seems weird to do before they are actually husband and wife

orwhatuwill · December 2013

Well, I think we'll do just fine then

JoanE2012 · December 2013

lyndausvi said:

orwhatuwill said:

What would make it extra "kick ass" over other weddings? I'm just interested to hear your thoughts. I'm pretty nervous!

Open bar not just beer and wine, prefer top shelf. Full meal, awesome entertainment for dancing. Some say band, I'm good with a great DJ. Snacks at midnight. Transportation to hotels (assuming it's not already in a hotel).

It might sound snobby, but I don't go out for NYE. It's amateur night. Watching 2 friends/family getting married alone is not enough incentive so-to-speak to bet me out with all the crazies. If I'm going to go out on NYE I want all the bells and whistles to make me forget I'm up way past my bedtime and have to go home with drunks out on the road.

This. And like any wedding, the guest should never have to open their wallet for anything. No cash bars, no partial bars, no dollar dances, etc.

MobKaz · December 2013

lyndausvi said:

orwhatuwill said:

What would make it extra "kick ass" over other weddings? I'm just interested to hear your thoughts. I'm pretty nervous!

Open bar not just beer and wine, prefer top shelf. Full meal, awesome entertainment for dancing. Some say band, I'm good with a great DJ. Snacks at midnight. Transportation to hotels (assuming it's not already in a hotel).

It might sound snobby, but I don't go out for NYE. It's amateur night. Watching 2 friends/family getting married alone is not enough incentive so-to-speak to bet me out with all the crazies. If I'm going to go out on NYE I want all the bells and whistles to make me forget I'm up way past my bedtime and have to go home with drunks out on the road.

My nephew held his wedding on NYE. In addition to all of the above, each table had noisemakers, hats, and headbands for guests to wear. They had a great balloon drop at midnight. A special champagne toast was also poured just prior to midnight.

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