Wedding Invitations & Paper

Seating Cards: One for each person or put couples on one?

We are doing assigned tables, but not assigned seats. For the seating cards should we put couples on one card or should each person get their own card? We may just post a list, but the same question applies. Couples listed together or on different lines?

Re: Seating Cards: One for each person or put couples on one?

  • I think it is best to have per person. If you use cards it is easier to tell which seats are taken if each person has a card. Same goes with the chart, how would you list families if not by individual?
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  • We did one per couple. Which seems to be the norm in my social circle unless there are assigned seats.   The only "families" we had were my siblings and we gave each kid their own.  They thought it was cool to get their own.  Plus they sat at a different table anyway.I'm not aware of any rules that say one is more accepted than the other.  

    As far as how they are listed.  We did Mr and Mrs Hisfirst Hislast if they were married (unless I knew the wife had a different preference).    Non-married couples I just listed them on separate lines.







    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
  • I'd put couples together on seating cards.  List them the same way you'd list them on an invitation.
  • We are doing one pp, as our venue requires entree selection prior to the event. We'll use some sort of color coded marking to indicate the entree choice on the escort card.
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  • It sounds like either is okay. I think I'm going to go with pp if I do cards (so you can mark your seat) and couples if I do a list. Kids will have their own/be listed on their own, as none of them will be sat with their parents. Our youngest guest is 7 and he will sit with his 13 year old brother and their other cousins.
  • I think it depends on what you're serving. If you are having a plated dinner, I recommend one per person so you can indicated what they will be eating. If you are having buffet, either are fine.
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  • kgd7357 said:
    It sounds like either is okay. I think I'm going to go with pp if I do cards (so you can mark your seat) and couples if I do a list. Kids will have their own/be listed on their own, as none of them will be sat with their parents. Our youngest guest is 7 and he will sit with his 13 year old brother and their other cousins.
    You're separating kids from parents? Really?
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  • kgd7357 said:
    It sounds like either is okay. I think I'm going to go with pp if I do cards (so you can mark your seat) and couples if I do a list. Kids will have their own/be listed on their own, as none of them will be sat with their parents. Our youngest guest is 7 and he will sit with his 13 year old brother and their other cousins.

    You're going to seat a 7 year old away from his parents? Have you mentioned this to parents yet? Kids' tables at weddings, in my experience, are usually a terrible idea. You get much better behaved kids at dinner when they have some supervision.

    OP, I'm with everyone else. Couples if it's buffet, individual if there's an entree selection.


     

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  • We did them per couple and indicated entrée selection on the back of the cards by color.
  • When I was 7, if you put me with my parents I would have been pissed. I would have rather sat with my older brother or I would have felt left out. It's not like he is 3. I was making the point that we have no really little kids. We don't have any kids tables. I wouldn't consider a 13 year old a kid, and that is the next youngest age we have. We are a very close family, and the 7 year old will be sitting with his brother and other cousins he knows very well. His mom and dad will be 6 feet away at another table. His mom and dad (my uncle) have been consulted and agreed that this would make him feel more included. I even asked if the 17 y/o daughter would prefer to be with her brothers or with the other cousins her age and she went with the later. She'll be one table over as well.

    Also, in our family small children are not invited to weddings. Bar and Bat Mitzvahs are for kids. Weddings are for teens and up generally. In this case, we couldn't leave one sibling out, and he is a first cousin. If his parents thought he couldn't behave, they wouldn't be bringing him.

  • Are 13-16 year olds really children? Not to me. If you can't behave as a 15 year old at a wedding, your parents have done something wrong. To me our wedding only has ONE child that will be attending. Sitting teenagers with their parents is like a punishment. Maybe if the young people in your family don't all know each other it would be different. But when you grow up hanging out and babysitting these people and you know they can behave like the young adults they are, it isn't any problem.

    Another pet peeve. "Kids Meals" for teenagers. Seriously, if you put chicken fingers in front of me as a 15 year old when adults got steak, I would think you were an idiot.

  • Jen4948Jen4948 member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    edited December 2013
    kgd7357 said:

    Are 13-16 year olds really children? Not to me. If you can't behave as a 15 year old at a wedding, your parents have done something wrong. To me our wedding only has ONE child that will be attending. Sitting teenagers with their parents is like a punishment. Maybe if the young people in your family don't all know each other it would be different. But when you grow up hanging out and babysitting these people and you know they can behave like the young adults they are, it isn't any problem.

    Another pet peeve. "Kids Meals" for teenagers. Seriously, if you put chicken fingers in front of me as a 15 year old when adults got steak, I would think you were an idiot.

    All of this.  When I attended big family events like weddings and bar/bat mitzvahs as a teenager, I was not usually seated with my parents (and didn't want to be).  Nor would I have wanted a "kid's meal" (and I didn't get them-I ate adult meals).

    Not only that, parents don't always want to spend their time at a wedding supervising their small children.  Some (not all, but some) are willing to let their kids, say ages 7 and up, sit at kid's tables with chaperones (who are not and should not be family teenagers) so that they can talk to other adults without being interrupted by the need to answer or discipline their children.  This is not to say that this works for everyone, but don't automatically assume that it works for no one.
  • kgd7357 said:
    It sounds like either is okay. I think I'm going to go with pp if I do cards (so you can mark your seat) and couples if I do a list. Kids will have their own/be listed on their own, as none of them will be sat with their parents. Our youngest guest is 7 and he will sit with his 13 year old brother and their other cousins.
    You're separating kids from parents? Really?
    our youngest guest was 6 (my niece) and she didn't sit with her parents.  She sat with her siblings and cousins (who were between 10 and 13).  My siblings requested not sitting with their kids.  They see their kids everyday, but because we all live around the world we do not get to see each other much.

    Growing up we never sat with our parents either.   Again same reason, the adults wanted to sit together.  

    This is a 'know your crowd" thing.  Kids tables were never disasters in our world.






    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
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