Ok to do?

Kota2012 · January 2014

My fiance and I are getting married in May and we have family members who are very...opinionated...when it comes to certain topics. (Political issues mostly.) Is it rude to say that politics should not be brought up, period?

themuffinman16 · January 2014

I would just keep the people with same opinions together. And try to divert the subject if it becomes too heated. Talk about your family, or great memories, they will see that politics should be cast aside for the day as this is your day, and they should be there to remember their bond with you. Who cares if so and so is in office, when their niece is getting married!

Viczaesar · January 2014

It's rude to dictate what your guests talk about, yes. I agree with @dmyrick78 that one way to strategically downplay the issue is not to seat those with polar opposite opinions (that you know of, anyway) together.

AddieCake · January 2014

You can't tell your guests what they are or are not allowed to talk about at your wedding.

JaxInBlue · January 2014

Agree with PPs. Let your seating chart be your friend here and seat the potentially opposing parties out of each other's earshot. That's the best you can do as it would be rude to set rules for adults' conversations.

FWIW, DH's family and much of mine are pretty much polar opposites on many topics where you'd expect there to be loud opinions. There were not any issues with people getting carried away at any wedding-related event.

phira · January 2014

Strategically seat people so that they're not with people they'll argue with.

It's worth mentioning that if you have guests at your wedding who are clueless enough to have a fight over politics during your wedding, they're not going to be the kind of people who would have actually listened if you had said, "Hey, maybe not political talk?"

The idea is that you should organize your event to minimize the issue (i.e. seating arrangement, entertainment to distract people), and then just assume guests will behave.

indianaalum · January 2014

1) Yes, it is rude

2) It simply wouldn't happen, even if you tried. People can't seem to stay off the topic if they are passionate about it

Jen4948 · January 2014

I think it makes more sense to plan seating to keep people with incompatible views at separate tables than it would to issue any requirement about what does and doesn't get discussed. Those requirements, aside from the rudeness of them, aren't enforceable.

I would have security available to deal with anyone who behaves inappropriately, including debates and arguments between guests that get out of control. But that's really all you can do to keep the peace.

Inkdancer · January 2014

I wouldn't expect too many problems with this, even if the guests are fairly opinionated. At your wedding, people are mostly going to either be meeting new family members and friends or mingling with people they already know. Most of the conversation will be either about your wedding, or "hey how are the kids/ job/ house/ gout?"

kmmssg · January 2014

Again, going to hammer home the seating chart. You can't ask people to censor their conversation but you can seat them with others with similar views. Don't overthink this. Everyone has a wierd Uncle Harold who hates the current political climate or thinks the government is evil.

Since you have asked, I am wondering if your family get togethers and holidays are riddeled with these issues and it has sparked concern.

sarahufl · January 2014

Agree. FI's family is overtly political and incredibly conservative. I have some friends I wouldn't dream of sitting with them because I would be afraid they would come to blows. I would never, ever tell them not to talk politics but I know better than to put them with some people- just try your hardest and hope for the best.

emmyg65 · January 2014

Also, trust that your guests can handle this. Adults generally know how to politely extract themselves from a conversation if if gets heated or takes a wrong turn.

Ok to do?

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