Bar question

Ojewel · January 2014

Hi ladies, My fiancé and I are getting married next fall and we've decided on a daytime wedding- ceremony at 11:30, reception after which would be over by 5. We are having beer, wine, champagne, mimosas, bellinis, and one other "signature" drink, but generally no hard liquor. My question is, what if someone orders a vodka or something? The coordinator at the venue said generally they put up a menu at the bar with what's available, but personally that wouldn't make me assume that this was an open bar with no hard liquor. So I guess my question is, has anyone seen how a bartender might handle this? Does he just offer them what we do have? I also thought about just running a tab (that I would pay for, not the guests) but I'm afraid of the unknown if how much it would cost. Thanks!

Inkdancer · January 2014

I was at a wedding recently that did this. If you tried to order anything they weren't serving, the bartenders would simply say, "I'm sorry, we don't have that available. Would you like X instead?" It was no big deal.

crunchymamaof2 · January 2014

Putting a menu beside the bar and asking the bartender not to serve other drinks is your best bet. If the bartender does choose to ignore your request and you don't find out until after, be sure to contact the venue and let them know how unhappy you are. But that's unlikely to happen. I think you're offering a great selection and, especially at that time of day, I don't think you'll find too many wanting anything else.

[Deleted User] · January 2014

I think you will be fine with the coordinators plan. You are offering a nic selection of beverages. You didn't list it but I'm sure there will be a selection of soft drinks and/or juices for those that don't want alcohol. People will find something to drink within that selection and be just fine with that. Most venues will only put out what beverages are available for ordering. If the bar is too big for them to remove all liquor that isn't included in your options, see if they have a table cloth they can use to cover the stuff that isn't avaialble for guests. Basically, if they don't see it, they won't order it.

sarahufl · January 2014

That is a great selection of alcohol, especially for the middle of the day. I vote for a menu on the bar.

emmyg65 · January 2014

If you put up the menu, most people will understand to order off of that. If someone asks for something else, tell the bartender to say "I'm sorry, we don't have that. Here's what we're serving." And point to the menu.

That's a great selection, especially for an afternoon wedding.

ei34 · January 2014

My parents selected an unlimited champagne, wine and beer package for my sisters' engagement party last year. The venue's set up, however, was a bartender standing at a full bar. A sign was made saying "K & M's Engagement Party..listed all types of wine and beer available to guests". However the guests that ordered liquor drinks, my parents requested to pick up the tab at the end of the party, so no guests would be required to pay.

Your offerings, especially for a day time reception, strike me as more than enough. You could either request that the bartender steer guests towards the options you're providing, or as you'd mentioned, pick up the tab for guests that select something else.

Jen4948 · January 2014

I agree that you have a great selection. If someone asks for something not on your menu, have the bartenders indicate the menu and respond with something like "I'm sorry, that's not available, but can I offer you X from our menu?"

PrettyGirlLost · January 2014

Could you place a menu or two at the bar like the venue coordinator suggested, but with a phrase something like:

Ojewel and Ojewel's Hubby thank you for sharing this celebration with them, and hope you enjoy the following selections from the bar- then list what is hosted.

doeydo · January 2014

If I was at a wedding and went to a bar that had a menu on the bar, I would check out the menu and just order off of it.

Ojewel · January 2014

Thanks guys! Just needed reassurance I guess about the menu idea, and would definitely like to put something like prettygirllost posted above. Great idea!

phira · January 2014

Inkdancer said:

I was at a wedding recently that did this. If you tried to order anything they weren't serving, the bartenders would simply say, "I'm sorry, we don't have that available. Would you like X instead?" It was no big deal.

Would you please tell my partner this? He is worried that his family will be offended if they try to order top shelf liquor and the bartenders tell them it's unavailable. I'm trying to convince him that we should have a limited open bar (so we can afford to host it all evening) and that we should NOT allow guests to pay cash for anything not on the menu.

CLI242009 · January 2014

phira said:

Inkdancer said:

I was at a wedding recently that did this. If you tried to order anything they weren't serving, the bartenders would simply say, "I'm sorry, we don't have that available. Would you like X instead?" It was no big deal.

Would you please tell my partner this? He is worried that his family will be offended if they try to order top shelf liquor and the bartenders tell them it's unavailable. I'm trying to convince him that we should have a limited open bar (so we can afford to host it all evening) and that we should NOT allow guests to pay cash for anything not on the menu.

I told my venue that I didn't want any hard alcohol preset. AT. ALL. So the coordinator agreed to not have any of the alcohol visible. Maybe ask your venue if they could do this, if not, I would suggest making your own menu and asking to place it at the bar.

Your partner might just be airing on the side of caution. My FI's family would get irritated if they saw the alcohol on display because to them if it's there then that means it's available to order. Both FI's parents warned me and so I inquired with the venue. Some might not make a big deal and just order something else or there could be someone who pushes and argues

"Well if it's not available why have it out then?" or what we have learned on here - they won't say anything to the B & G but guests will still be pissy about it. Everyone is different....I am the same way, if it's not available, why the hell do you have it out then?

phira · January 2014

Yeah, we're going to see if our venue can "hide" all the alcohol that's not available, so no one sees the nice liquor and wonders why they can't have it.

I don't like beer and I'm not a huge wine drinker; I much prefer mixed drinks. So we're definitely going to have liquor and not just have beer and wine. I'm just trying to convince my partner that our guests will be FINE drinking house liquor on our tab. After all, if we were hosting at our apartment and bought the liquor ourselves, it's not like guests could say, "Well, I'd rather have this other type of liquor you aren't serving."

kaos16 · January 2014

I also agree with putting up printed menus. If you title it something like "Today's libations" or "Drink Menu" etc, people should get the picture. If not, it is quite simple to have the bartender reference back to your menu instead of having to list everything that is available.

kiwikiss56 · January 2014

something like this on the bar would be cute!

http://www.etsy.com/listing/95972699/wedding-sign-drinkbar-menu-customized (you could probably make yourself)

@phira do you know what brands of liquor your venue considers house? When I order mixed drinks I definitely look behind the bar to see what kind of liquor is available at weddings.

tammym1001 · January 2014

I would also see if the bar can put away whatever you aren't serving. My venue has a list of stuff that comes with each bar package and that's all they put out for your event so there isn't even an option for people to order anything else.

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