Wedding Etiquette Forum

Who is up for a challenge?

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Re: Who is up for a challenge?

  • AddieCakeAddieCake member
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 25 Answers
    edited January 2014
    Because, Amy, if you don't validate a speshul snowflake's idea, you are mean. 
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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  • lyndausvilyndausvi mod
    Moderator Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its
    edited January 2014
    AddieL73 said:
    aleighc3 said:
    I didn't know that telling people mean things had to be written somewhere for people not to do it....hmmm
    "Mean things" is subjective. That's the point. 
    Not agreeing with your idea =/= mean.   









    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
  • Would also like to find out where it says the knot is supposed to be a place to support unconditionally validate other brides and love each other and not tell each other mean mean things the truth.
    Fixed it for you.

    "Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."


  • And how did a wedding day become "our special day" (or your special day if you are a vendor talking to a couple)?

    That phrase wants me want to murder someone.  
    photo composite_14153800476219.jpg
  • Can I add, I hate when they say "no one knows our situation" to the list of dislikes. Of course we don't know your super special situation if you don't tell us. AND most of the time, it's not very super special at all.  I always roll my eyes when someone says this. If it was important, you would have mentioned it in the first place.
  • Can I add, I hate when they say "no one knows our situation" to the list of dislikes. Of course we don't know your super special situation if you don't tell us. AND most of the time, it's not very super special at all.  I always roll my eyes when someone says this. If it was important, you would have mentioned it in the first place.
    Yes. There's always additional information that suddenly applies. My Spidey senses always tingle at those. 


    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
    image
  • Jen4948 said:

    Oh, also: "I/She didn't ask you."  By posting here, you/she sure did!

    Or "It's your opinion."  Etiquette is not our opinion.  Disagreeing with it is yours.

    This. I think the egg-sized bruise on my forehead is going to take a month to heal after I had to bang my head on my desk repeatedly.
  • AprilH81 said:
    And how did a wedding day become "our special day" (or your special day if you are a vendor talking to a couple)?

    That phrase wants me want to murder someone.  
    I'm so glad no vendor ever said this, because I would have eye rolled so hard. I really think I just did all of my vendor stuff with the most straight forward, etiquette ladies out there. The ones who weren't afraid to say- no don't do that, that'll be bad. 
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • I kind of wonder how some of these people function in society, when simple criticism or disagreement is enough to make them fly off the handle.  I would really like to know what it's like to be so perfect that no one has ever given them constructive criticism at work, or school, or any other aspect of their lives.  Or maybe they just quit when that happens, assuming that their boss/teacher/whatever is "jealous."  Who knows.

     

    When i was at a prior job a few years ago, the supervisors had training that pretty much sums up what kids coming out of school are like these days.  We were told that, when dealing with interns and assigning them a task, we needed to explain to them why that task would advance their career, and why it was so important that we asked them to do that task and not someone else.  Um, they're interns.  You start at the bottom.  If I'm your boss, and I'm so busy that I can't make my own copies, you're going to have to do it until you know enough for me to trust you with more important jobs.  I'm not going to make up a story about how an intern is super lucky to have the opportunity to make my copies, because that will make them such a better professional, and i personally selected them for this job because the're so special.  Needless to say, I no longer work there.

  • delujm0 said:

    I kind of wonder how some of these people function in society, when simple criticism or disagreement is enough to make them fly off the handle.  I would really like to know what it's like to be so perfect that no one has ever given them constructive criticism at work, or school, or any other aspect of their lives.  Or maybe they just quit when that happens, assuming that their boss/teacher/whatever is "jealous."  Who knows.

     

    When i was at a prior job a few years ago, the supervisors had training that pretty much sums up what kids coming out of school are like these days.  We were told that, when dealing with interns and assigning them a task, we needed to explain to them why that task would advance their career, and why it was so important that we asked them to do that task and not someone else.  Um, they're interns.  You start at the bottom.  If I'm your boss, and I'm so busy that I can't make my own copies, you're going to have to do it until you know enough for me to trust you with more important jobs.  I'm not going to make up a story about how an intern is super lucky to have the opportunity to make my copies, because that will make them such a better professional, and i personally selected them for this job because the're so special.  Needless to say, I no longer work there.

    Wow. Our intern pool had a meeting where the VP basically told us "do what you're told and do it well, and maybe one day you can do something that sucks less". I followed that advice and am no longer an intern. I like my VP a lot better than your former boss!
    Daisypath Anniversary tickers
    eyeroll
  • sarahufl said:
    I want to add one - the consultant at David's Bridal balked at my $500 budget and tried to talk me into something 3 times as much. Why?

    Because a wedding dress is "an investment" no, actually. A wedding dress is an outfit. That you wear once.
    This. My TOTAL dress budget (including alterations) is $600, because I choked at spending even that much on a dress I would only wear ONCE. 

    A couple people who I shared this information with gave me a raised eyebrow "yeah, good luck with that" look. Of course, they were also people who spent $4k on their dresses.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • edited January 2014
    When the bride says "We are paying for the wedding ourselves" when trying to defend a  terrible etiquette faux pas.

    Edited extra word.
  • sarahufl said:
    I want to add one - the consultant at David's Bridal balked at my $500 budget and tried to talk me into something 3 times as much. Why?

    Because a wedding dress is "an investment" no, actually. A wedding dress is an outfit. That you wear once.
    This. My TOTAL dress budget (including alterations) is $600, because I choked at spending even that much on a dress I would only wear ONCE. 

    A couple people who I shared this information with gave me a raised eyebrow "yeah, good luck with that" look. Of course, they were also people who spent $4k on their dresses.

    Um. even the $500 I paid (sans alterations) seemed absurd to me. I felt awful doing it. But the dress is really beautiful and I feel like myself in it. I hope alterations aren't too bad, I know I need a bustle but hopefully not more than that.

    My FMIL tried to talk me into a $300 veil, too. Nope.
    image
  • I had a wedding-obsessed friend tell me I was crazy for working with such a tight budget. Her advice to me was to not worry about prices, just get everything that I want no matter what because it's my wedding and the most importantest thing to ever happen in life so debt shouldn't be a factor. Yea, ok, I'm sure my credit card companies would totally understand that and not charge me interest! I rolled my eyes so hard at her that I gave myself a migraine.
    ~*~*~*~*~

  • I had a wedding-obsessed friend tell me I was crazy for working with such a tight budget. Her advice to me was to not worry about prices, just get everything that I want no matter what because it's my wedding and the most importantest thing to ever happen in life so debt shouldn't be a factor. Yea, ok, I'm sure my credit card companies would totally understand that and not charge me interest! I rolled my eyes so hard at her that I gave myself a migraine.
    I've had this happen too more than once! The worst one was a PPDer (and no, I did not know it was a PPD until two weeks after and I was a bridesmaid and FI was a groomsman) who was chatting bouquets with me. 

    Her bouquet alone apparently cost $750. When I was telling her I'd love peonies, but they were totally out of budget, she responded, "Well it's your FI's parent's job to buy that for you, so just get them anyway. It's not like you'll see the bill." I was horrified and told her I couldn't do that and that I was paying for my own bouquet. 
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  • Alyson117 said:
    hmmm, it might be the most expensive day of your life.
    It probably ranks up there as one of the most expensive but buying a house (hopefully!) tops the wedding as the most expensive day in a person's life!
  • Alyson117 said:
    hmmm, it might be the most expensive day of your life.
    It probably ranks up there as one of the most expensive but buying a house (hopefully!) tops the wedding as the most expensive day in a person's life!
  • PDKH said:



    I had a wedding-obsessed friend tell me I was crazy for working with such a tight budget. Her advice to me was to not worry about prices, just get everything that I want no matter what because it's my wedding and the most importantest thing to ever happen in life so debt shouldn't be a factor. Yea, ok, I'm sure my credit card companies would totally understand that and not charge me interest! I rolled my eyes so hard at her that I gave myself a migraine.

    I've had this happen too more than once! The worst one was a PPDer (and no, I did not know it was a PPD until two weeks after and I was a bridesmaid and FI was a groomsman) who was chatting bouquets with me. 

    Her bouquet alone apparently cost $750. When I was telling her I'd love peonies, but they were totally out of budget, she responded, "Well it's your FI's parent's job to buy that for you, so just get them anyway. It's not like you'll see the bill." I was horrified and told her I couldn't do that and that I was paying for my own bouquet. 


    HOLY crap this! A friend(?) announced right after we got engaged that she would not settle for any wedding that is less than $100,000 wedding, paid for by groom. And if he can't afford, she wouldn't marry him.

    I was like WTF?
  • See, this crap is why guys think all girls turn into Bridezillas!!
    ~*~*~*~*~

  • My bouquet is $30.00. 

    Yeah I had a friend freak out on me because I am not buying new shoes to wear. I have nude heels and flats that I am planning on using for my wedding day. 

    Not spending money on something weddingy that i will only wear once. No way!

    My mom is doing my flowers (I know I am lucky that she has that talent). The other day, we went to the grocery store to look at what they had to get a feel for what I might want. I picked out a few beautiful bouquets and said I would take any of them. The most expensive one? $15. 

    The woman at the florist looked at me like I was nuts. Obviously she is more used to people who go bananas about flowers. 
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  • Haha i just thought of another one - including things like "unique situation" in the name of a post.  SPOILER ALERT: none of the situations are ever unique, and you can't get us to agree to your breach of etiquette just because they exist.

     

    Examples:

    "Firing a Bridesmaid - UNIQUE SITUATION"

    "Civil ceremony first - UNIQUE SITUATION"

    "Cash bar - UNIQUE SITUATION"

     

    Sigh.

  • delujm0 said:

    Haha i just thought of another one - including things like "unique situation" in the name of a post.  SPOILER ALERT: none of the situations are ever unique, and you can't get us to agree to your breach of etiquette just because they exist.

     

    Examples:

    "Firing a Bridesmaid - UNIQUE SITUATION"

    "Civil ceremony first - UNIQUE SITUATION"

    "Cash bar - UNIQUE SITUATION"

     

    Sigh.

    </blockquote1
    Such a silly excuse!
    Every fricken situation about everything is unique
    because people are unique! But bad decisions are bad decisions no matter how "unique" you or your situation are! I do believe in exceptions but it better be a damn good exception and I have yet to see one
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