Anxiously waiting on my proposal

Re: Anxiously waiting on my proposal

• buddysmom80 member

  

  January 2014

  cpalasz said:

  Hey all!

  First time poster here. I shall give you a bit of a backstory. My BF and I are planning our wedding, I'm just waiting on my "actual" proposal. We've known for a long time that we wanted ot get married, talks got more serious over the summer and in the Fall he basically said "We're getting married this summer" and we picked our date! We decided to start planning without the actual proposal for a few reasons. 1. Summer is a busy time and with more limited options venue wise where we live we wanted to make sure we got what we wanted before it got booked up (our date was non-negotiable). 2. My BF has a grand proposal idea (and this is where the anxious part kicks in)....I know he's been planning this since the beginning of November, or wedding is in July....this must be some grand proposal (which makes my head swim of what it could be).

  
  

  I'm waiting as patiently as I can but sometimes I want to shake him and say "hurry up already" lol

  You don't need a ring to be engaged. If you both agreed to get married and set a date then you're engaged. You don't need some grand proposal. I didn't get one and it didn't make my engagement less valid than the person who got engaged in some grand gesture.
  

   

  
  

  
  

  
  

  59 Invited
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• GoldenPenguin mod

  

  January 2014

  

  
  

  
  

  
  

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• cpalasz member

  

  January 2014

  This is very true. I just know that I will be getting a proposal, it's just a matter of when

  

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• Blackbird230 member

  

  January 2014

  Haha @BriSox81, we were saying lately we were missing the crazies.

  
  

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• buddysmom80 member

  

  January 2014

  cpalasz said:

  This is very true. I just know that I will be getting a proposal, it's just a matter of when

  
  Get a hobby or something in the meantime. Wedding planning will keep you busy enough before the "BIG PROPOSAL".

  This can't be real...

   

  
  

  
  

  
  

  59 Invited
   36 Yes
   2 No
   21 Unknown
  

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• CLoGreenEyes member

  

  January 2014

  

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• [Deleted User] member

  

  January 2014

  it'll come when it comes.  enjoy your life as it is now and embrace change as it happens, instead of trying to live in the future.  I know it seems super-duper-exciting right now (and it is), but let a married lady tell you: it's not worth missing out on the present.  learning to be content where you are currently at is a skill that will benefit you for life.
  

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• emmyg65 member

  

  January 2014

  Congratulations, you're already engaged!

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• Swazzle member

  

  January 2014

  

  
  

  Prince came to visit twice in one week! 

  
  
  

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• Dignity100 member

  

  January 2014

  Holy crap - I just realized I'm not engaged because "FI" never gave me an elaborate proposal ... he just handed me the ring and said 'here ya go'.
  
  
  

  
  
  
  

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• Peaseblossom55 mod

  

  January 2014

  Yay Prince!

  
  

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• doubleSS07 member

  

  January 2014

  I don't think that I would be excited for some "grand proposal" if I were already moved on to planning the wedding.  I'd probably be more like this:

  

  
  

  
  

  

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• cpalasz member

  

  January 2014

  For those who had positive feedback, it's very much appreciated!! To the negative ones....glad I could be a "source" of your amusement for the day

  

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• ShallowSeas member

  

  January 2014

  If you know you're getting married, you know when you're getting married, and you're actively planning your wedding...you're engaged.  You can be engaged without a ring just like you can be married without a big, lavish wedding.  Deciding you want to get married and setting a date was your proposal.
  
  
  
  
  
  

  

  

   

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• Swazzle member

  

  January 2014 edited January 2014

  In all seriousness, though, it might benefit you to read the post linked below which is posted at the top of NEY:

  
  

  CLICK
  

  
  

  ETA: Specifically the dark blue, bolded line that states: "Be aware that many of the posters on this board do NOT encourage planning a wedding before you consider yourself engaged. "

  
  
  

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• ShallowSeas member

  

  January 2014

  and for the record, I don't think anyone was being negative or using you as a source of amusement. We were all being honest.  This board is full of honest ladies. Nothing negative was said about you planning your wedding. Congrats on it. We just let you know that you are actually already engaged.
  

  

  

   

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• Blue & White member

  

  January 2014

  Plusalso, if you're willing to waste money paying a deposit on a wedding that might not happen, can you PLEASE send some my way?  Address it to Blue & White & FI's Wedding Fund, c/o TK, blah blah blah.  I'm sure it'll get to me.
  

  I guess, to tell you the truth, I've never had much of a desire to grow facial hair. I think I've managed to play quarterback just fine without a mustache. - Peyton

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• cpalasz member

  

  January 2014

  Read it, figured as adults we would be past the negativity.

  
  

  Thank you negative commenters for your "well wishes". I have now learned to not post my own posts to these boards, but only to give my positive side of life opinions to others.

  

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• buddysmom80 member

  

  January 2014

  cpalasz said:

  For those who had positive feedback, it's very much appreciated!! To the negative ones....glad I could be a "source" of your amusement for the day

  
  No one was negative...

   

  
  

  
  

  
  

  59 Invited
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• cpalasz member

  

  January 2014

  First off - I never said I did not consider myself engaged, just waiting on an official proposal.

  
  

  Secondly - I wasn't aware that gif's with curse words, calling someone crazy, heavy sarcasm or saying "this can't be for real" were positive things?

  

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• bethsmiles member

  

  January 2014

  I don't think anyone is being negative but it really doesn't make sense that you are doing everything an engaged couple does but don't consider yourselves engaged yet.
  
  There's nothing wrong if he wants to do a big romantic gesture when giving you the ring but he won't really be asking you to marry him will he? I mean you've already planned the wedding...
  

  
  

  
  

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• ShallowSeas member

  

  January 2014

  cpalasz said:

  First off - I never said I did not consider myself engaged, just waiting on an official proposal.

  
  

  Secondly - I wasn't aware that gif's with curse words, calling someone crazy, heavy sarcasm or saying "this can't be for real" were positive things?

  but you called him your BF? not FI...?
  

  

  

   

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• Swazzle member

  

  January 2014

  cpalasz said:

  Read it, figured as adults we would be past the negativity.

  
  

  Thank you negative commenters for your "well wishes". I have now learned to not post my own posts to these boards, but only to give my positive side of life opinions to others.

  Where is there negativity?

  
  
  

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• GoldenPenguin mod

  

  January 2014

  

  
  

  
  

  
  

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• buddysmom80 member

  

  January 2014

  Maybe WeddingBee is more your speed. They'll be more than happy to blow rainbows and sunshine up your ass.

  We're just keeping it real here, yo.

   

  
  

  
  

  
  

  59 Invited
   36 Yes
   2 No
   21 Unknown
  

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• phira member

  

  January 2014

  This is one of the reasons why I hate the whole big proposal narrative. Good lord, if you are tired of waiting, tell your guy, "Look, we're already planning the wedding, and I am feeling really anxious about waiting for the proposal. I love you and while I appreciate how much you care about the proposal, it's getting a bit silly to me that we're starting to plan this wedding and I don't even feel like we're engaged yet. The whole point of proposing to me is to ask me to marry you, but you already know that I will. So, will you be my fiance?"

  
  

  Because goodness, for the love of everything, I just do not get the point of proposing to someone after you've starting planning a wedding.

  

  now with ~* INCREASED SASSINESS *~
  
  

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• beanbot2002 member

  

  January 2014

  My fart picture won't load.

  "Stuart was scared, but he loved Margalo, Mommy. And there is nothing bigger than love." -The Bean
   "His farts smell like Satan's asshole mixed with a skunk's vagina. But it's okay, because I love him." -CSousa

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

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• Swazzle member

  

  January 2014

  en·gage·ment

  enˈgājmənt/

  noun

  1. 1.

     a formal agreement to get married.

  
  

  
  

  
  

  Call me crazy but if you're planning a wedding with your SO then you've agreed to get married. 

  
  
  

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• beanbot2002 member

  

  January 2014

  cpalasz said:

  Read it, figured as adults we would be past the negativity.

  
  

  Thank you negative commenters for your "well wishes". I have now learned to not post my own posts to these boards, but only to give my positive side of life opinions to others.

  
  

  "Stuart was scared, but he loved Margalo, Mommy. And there is nothing bigger than love." -The Bean
   "His farts smell like Satan's asshole mixed with a skunk's vagina. But it's okay, because I love him." -CSousa

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

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• Dignity100 member

  

  January 2014

  Most of us here are just saying we already believe you to be engaged.  At this point your SO knows you will not turn him down when he 'asks' because you've already been actively planning. 
  Instead of saying: Anxiously awaiting my proposal
  say: Anxiously awaiting my ring
  Instead of saying: Grand Proposal
  Say: Grand romantic gesture
  
  You already put a deposit on a location and have a solid date - many of us 'newly' engaged on this board have just picked out a venue or in my case am still waiting to see if I get my venue/slot. 
  
  I know with me - I didn't have a ring when FI and I started picking dates out and venues.  We even told our families before I had the ring.  Sure I had that 'Holy crap we're engaged' moment where I didn't have a ring to show off - but it's all good, I survived (as many others have done and are doing).  As stated before: A ring does not make an engagement; agreement to get married does.  It is somewhat insulting to those of us who 'decided as a team' to get married to say 'we're not engaged because I don't have a ring and the whole grand romantic night of magic that goes with it'.
  
  So there - not being negative, just explaining where we are coming from.  Maybe you could enlighten us on how it is you're 'not engaged but actively planning'
  

  
  
  
  

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