Community› Wedding Discussion Boards› Wedding Etiquette Forum
Wedding Etiquette Forum
New Discussion

Groom family situation

lindseyjaneelindseyjanee member
First Comment
in Wedding Etiquette Forum
Help! I need to find a place to put the Grooms two sisters. I didn't even think about it... We already have the bridesmaids and groomsmen worked out. He has two sisters. One is married and has a son and daughter (they are the flower girl and ring bearer). I just don't know what to do. Please give suggestions 
Report Reply to Post

Re: Groom family situation

  • lyndausvilyndausvi mod
    Moderator Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its
    You don't have to find a place for them.   






    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
    Report Reply
  • photokittyphotokitty mod
    Moderator Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its
    Do you mean find them a place to sit not he seating chart? 
    You don't need to find them a place in the WP. You could have them do a reading or carry up the gifts (depending on the ceremony). Or just let them come and have a good time being honor guests.
    :kiss: ~xoxo~ :kiss:

    Report Reply
  • PnkBridePnkBride member
    Knottie Warrior 10 Comments 5 Love Its
    Have them each do a reading.
    Report Reply
  • lindseyjaneelindseyjanee member
    First Comment
    I mean in the ceremony not at the reception or in the seating. 
    Report Reply
  • misshart00misshart00 member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary First Answer
    edited January 2014
    lindseyjanee said:
    I mean in the ceremony not at the reception or in the seating. 

    You don't have to include them in the ceremony. Unless your fiancé wants them on his side.
    Report Reply
  • AddieCakeAddieCake member
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 25 Answers
    If your fiance wants them in the wedding, they can stand on his side as groomsmaids.
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
    image
    Report Reply
  • chibiyuichibiyui member
    5000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 5 Answers
    You don't have to include them. If your FI wants to include them they can stand on his side or they can do a reading.
    image



    Anniversary
    Report Reply
  • KatWAGKatWAG member
    2500 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    chibiyui said:
    You don't have to include them. If your FI wants to include them they can stand on his side or they can do a reading.

    This. Not everyone needs a job or title. Being a guest is an honor
    BabyFruit Ticker
    Report Reply
  • mrsbizzzmrsbizzz member
    Fourth Anniversary 100 Comments 25 Love Its Name Dropper
    KatWAG said:
    chibiyui said:
    You don't have to include them. If your FI wants to include them they can stand on his side or they can do a reading.

    This. Not everyone needs a job or title. Being a guest is an honor
    This is true. While you don't have to find jobs for everyone, keep in mind that people might give the sideeye if you don't. In our case, my sister is my MOH and my brother is an usher, so all of my siblings were involved. FI's brother was a groomsman and sisters were not involved.

    I wasn't planning on including my two FSILs until my FMIL straight up asked what their role would be. I knew at that point - by the fact that she asked and the tone of her voice - that I needed to include them.


    Report Reply
  • MNVegasMNVegas member
    Fifth Anniversary 1000 Comments 250 Love Its Name Dropper
    Why do they have to do anything? When my brother got married, neither myself nor my sister was in the wedding. Worked out great for us just being guests. 

    Since these are the groom's sisters, what does he want?
    Mary Click here for my bio! image
    Report Reply
  • KatWAGKatWAG member
    2500 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    drmrs2014 said:
    KatWAG said:
    chibiyui said:
    You don't have to include them. If your FI wants to include them they can stand on his side or they can do a reading.

    This. Not everyone needs a job or title. Being a guest is an honor
    This is true. While you don't have to find jobs for everyone, keep in mind that people might give the sideeye if you don't. In our case, my sister is my MOH and my brother is an usher, so all of my siblings were involved. FI's brother was a groomsman and sisters were not involved.

    I wasn't planning on including my two FSILs until my FMIL straight up asked what their role would be. I knew at that point - by the fact that she asked and the tone of her voice - that I needed to include them.



    If your Fi wants them involved then they can stand on his side. FMIL should have no say in your wedding party.
    BabyFruit Ticker
    Report Reply
  • msuprincess04msuprincess04 member
    Knottie Warrior 500 Love Its 1000 Comments First Answer
    As PP have said, you get to choose who is in your wedding party, and if you didn't choose them, it's fine. However, if you want to please your FMIL or just don't feel like making waves, then ask them to do a reading.
    "There is always some madness in love. But there is also always some reason in madness." -Friedrich Nietzsche, "On Reading and Writing"
    Report Reply
  • phiraphira member
    5000 Comments 500 Love Its Second Anniversary 5 Answers
    So other posters have it right: you don't need to include them. I was going to say, "If you REALLY feel like you need to include them ..." except that it's really your fiance's thing to care about.

    If he really wants to include his sisters, then he can ask them to be in the wedding part on his side, or he can ask them to do a reading. Keep in mind that one of the sisters IS already involved in the wedding: her children are in the wedding party. That doesn't mean that she can't do anything else, but that is actually already a level of involvement.

    However, the key thing here is that it's up to your fiance. They're his sisters.

    Some perspectives:

    1) My brother got married a few years ago, and there was a lot of stress trying to involve siblings. My dad is remarried with two stepkids, but we are not close to his stepkids. Meanwhile, my ex-sister-in-law has two siblings, about 5 stepbrothers and a stepsister. They decided to have her step-sister as maid of honor, all four biological siblings (me, my sister, and my ex-SIL's brothers) hold the chuppah, and the stepbrothers were all ushers. My brother chose not to involve my dad's stepkids because we barely know them and one of them didn't even attend.

    2) My partner's two brothers are pretty much his best friends, and he insisted that they be his best men. Wedding planning has been stressful because I'm trying to preserve my relationships with my siblings while remaining estranged from our father. My brother is too conservative to be okay with standing up on my side as a bridesman, so I asked my partner if he would include my brother as a groomsman. He said no. And you know what? That's his decision. He isn't close to my brother, and if he were to have more groomsmen, he has friends he would want to ask. If I want to include my brother (my sister is a bridesmaid), then it's up to me to find a way to include him.
    Anniversary
    now with ~* INCREASED SASSINESS *~
    image
    Report Reply
  • mrsbizzzmrsbizzz member
    Fourth Anniversary 100 Comments 25 Love Its Name Dropper
    msuprincess04 said:
    As PP have said, you get to choose who is in your wedding party, and if you didn't choose them, it's fine. However, if you want to please your FMIL or just don't feel like making waves, then ask them to do a reading.
    We included them as readers, so they are not in the wedding party. That was never the plan.
    Report Reply
  • Knope2014Knope2014 member
    Second Anniversary 25 Love Its 10 Comments
    You could also honor them with a corsage if you'd like.  It distinguishes them from the rest of the guests, as immediate family.
    Report Reply
  • Jen4948Jen4948 member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    You don't have to do anything to "honor" them.  If anything needs to be done, your FI can do it.
    Report Reply
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards