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Father daughter dance music selection for awkward relationship

shann106shann106 member
First Anniversary First Comment
in Wedding Party
Help! I cannot come up with a song for the obligatory father daughter dance. Our relationship is very strained and no matter what I pick it is going to be awkward. I plan on having the DJ invite all father and daughters up to join us very quickly after the song starts to help the situation and take the focus off us but I need appropriate songs. Thanks!
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Re: Father daughter dance music selection for awkward relationship

  • mysticlmysticl member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    shann106 said:
    Help! I cannot come up with a song for the obligatory father daughter dance. Our relationship is very strained and no matter what I pick it is going to be awkward. I plan on having the DJ invite all father and daughters up to join us very quickly after the song starts to help the situation and take the focus off us but I need appropriate songs. Thanks!
    It's not obligatory.  You do not have to do it. But if you feel like you must maybe use an instrumental piece so it doesn't have as much of a "message" to it.  

    Is the groom dancing with his mother?  If so are you going to invite mother/son pairs to join them?  If the answer to that first question is "yes" and the answer to the second is "no".  Your plan might draw more attention to your issues instead of deflecting from it.  
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  • Blue_BirdBlue_Bird member
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    The dance is not obligatory. If you're not comfortable with it, then skip it.
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  • chibiyuichibiyui member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    Skip the dance. I have a strained relationship with bio dad so I'm skipping it.
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  • OliveOilsMomOliveOilsMom member
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    No need to have one if it will be uncomfortable for you.
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  • artbyallieartbyallie mod
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    Skip it. My cousin hated her father/daughter dance and I wish she'd had the confidence to just say it wasn't happening.

    Incidentally, she picked the same song my dad did, "Cinderella" by Steven Curtis Chapman.
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  • cookie0803cookie0803 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper First Comment
    You definitely are not obligated to have a father/daughter dance. I have a terrible relationship with my father. We were trying to work on it, so I decided to have the dance, ask DH to dance with his mom at that time also, and let my dad choose the song. We danced to "In My Life" by The Beatles. Kinda sweet, kinda questionable, but whatever. I was visibly uncomfortable and unhappy in those pictures, but the ones of DH and his mom were very sweet!
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  • mimiphinmimiphin member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    You don't have to do a father daughter dance if you don't want to.
    But if you do decide to continue with it you don't have to pick a sappy "my dad is so great, I'm his little girl" song. Just pick a song that means something to you.

    My dad and I are sort of in the same boat, I am using an Ian Tyson song "Navajo Rug" since I am originally from Alberta and it means something to me. Maybe see if there is a song like that for you.

    But you by no means have to do the father daughter dance!

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  • effiek91effiek91 member
    5 Love Its First Comment Name Dropper
    I've been wondering the same thing, my Dad and I are doing much better than we were a year ago, and I believe in the next year or so by the time the wedding happens, we will be continuing to get better. However, I still feel slightly uncomfortable when thinking about it, and since it's not obligatory there's no reason it should be done. Besides all this, he's not really the dancing type, at all haha. I never could even imagine him dancing. My mom can't either. So while I will have him walk me down the aisle, I am thinking that I will forgo the father-daughter dance.
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  • mlg78mlg78 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Answer Name Dropper
    Just skip it. People will see it's very strained and will there really be THAT many fathers and daughters at your wedding to be able to join you? I know at my wedding there may have been 3? They'd definitely all be on my husband's side so that's just a guess... Are you being pressured into this? My mom kept pressuring me to dance with my stepdad. My dad died 15 years ago so it was a touchy subject. I let him walk me down the aisle and say a brief welcome toast at our reception but the father/daughter dance is where I drew the line. A couple minutes before the entrance to the reception my mom begged me one last time to do it and turned to a bridesmaid and said, "tell her she needs to do it." Boy am I glad she happened to ask the one bridesmaid whose father had also passed away. That shut my mom up. :)
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