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Engagement Party Questions

sdestefano12sdestefano12 member
First Anniversary First Comment
in Wedding Etiquette Forum
I have my engagement party coming up in March.  My parents are hosting it at a local restaurant (just dinner & dessert) in a private room.  I had two questions regarding etiquette:

1) Is assigned seating acceptable at a function like this?  I am just worried about there being scattered seats left over when a couple walks in, etc.  I want everyone to get a seat with who they want & not have to move chairs so they don't have to sit with strangers or little kids.

2) Are party favors a must/typical?  I'm not the creative type & have no idea what to get if it is expected!

Thanks!
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Re: Engagement Party Questions

  • ei34ei34 member
    Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers

    My sister's engagement party was in the private room of a restaurant, and because there were around 60 guests (a mix of our family, her FI's family, and friends), there was assigned seating.  Well, guests weren't assigned a seat, but a table, with other guests from the same circle.

    Neither her engagement party nor mine (more simple- pizza in my parents' backyard) included favors.  The only times I've received a favor at an engagement party was when it was a mini-wedding (100+ guests, DJ, introductions, etc).

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  • Maggie0829Maggie0829 member
    Eighth Anniversary 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    Your first question is a good question.  I am first inclined to say let them sit wherever but I also see your point.  I guess you could do assigned tables if you think it is going to be a huge issue.  Or you could just see if the restaurant could set up an additional table or two so that people can spread out if they need to.

    For your second I would say party favors aren't necessary at all.  They aren't necessary for weddings or for any party for that matter.  I mean, if your parents have the extra money and want to do them then that is great but I would skip them.

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  • cruffinocruffino member
    Ninth Anniversary 1000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    I think both are optional, however I personally think place cards were alwayys a nice touch if the party is larger than say 20, or if there are multiple tables.
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  • InkdancerInkdancer member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its First Anniversary First Answer
    If there are going to be 60 seats for 60 people, I would assign seating to make sure everyone gets to sit with their SO. If there are going to be 80 seats for 60 people, I would let people sit wherever they want.
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  • AroundTheBlockAroundTheBlock member
    Eighth Anniversary 250 Love Its 100 Comments First Answer

    The best "favour" you can give your guests at a formal party is the time and effort to ensure that they will be seated with enjoyable table-mates. Give-away souvenirs always seem rather reminiscent of children's birthday party-bags; and they usually end up as clutter or trash -- they are absolutely not necessary.

    Seating arrangements are appropriate at any level of dinner more formal than a pic-nic, and are certainly proper for the kind of party you are anticipating. You can use place-cards or a seating chart or both, but unless there are more than three-dozen guests or so then place-cards are the easier for your guests in helping them find their places.

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  • JCbride2015JCbride2015 member
    5000 Comments 500 Love Its Second Anniversary First Answer
    You can do seating arrangements if the number of chairs is exact to make it easier on the guests.  Placecards can lend a formal air to a party and it would help your guests settle in.

    And favors are absolutely not necessary.
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  • MandyMostMandyMost member
    Knottie Warrior 1000 Comments 500 Love Its Name Dropper
    For an engagement party of, say, 20-40 people I might do actual seating cards. Like, you put the cards with the names at the seats before anyone gets there. At a wedding reception I'm all about assigned tables and never assigned seats, but I think it would be nice and formal to have actual assigned seats for a smaller party like that. 

    Definitely no favors, in my opinion. Just make sure your guests are comfortable and have plenty of food and drink!
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  • doeydodoeydo member
    Seventh Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Personally, I wouldn't bother with either.
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  • Jen4948Jen4948 member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    You don't need favors.

    But for an engagement party, while place cards are again optional, I think it would be nice to assign seats so people don't keep being asked to move over or change seats so that some people can sit together.
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