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I just yelled and swore at FI.

EverAferEverAfer member
100 Love Its 100 Comments Name Dropper
in Chit Chat
He's a bad planner and I have to remind him everything.

It just occurred to me..did he asked for our wedding day off? He works every other weekend and I didn't check to see if it's his weekend on.

No, he Did Not. He figures it's 6 months away. I'm like July? You know how many people already put in their vacation request?

Ah...this man!
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Re: I just yelled and swore at FI.

  • Maggie0829Maggie0829 member
    Eighth Anniversary 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    I think you need to relax a bit. He is asking for one day off (maybe two) and most companies will be a bit easy going when it comes to a person needing off for their wedding.

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  • AddieCakeAddieCake member
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 25 Answers
    My husband had to fly home for our wedding b/c he was working out of state. He booked his flight for the Wednesday before. And then I had to remind him we had to get our marriage license on Wednesday or we couldn't get married on Saturday, which is why I had told him repeatedly to book it for Tuesday. He had to spend $300 to change the flight. 

    So it could be worse!


    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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  • EverAferEverAfer member
    100 Love Its 100 Comments Name Dropper
    I am going into my Zen zone and having a glass of wine or three. I just can't believe he didn't think of it....We're expecting alot of OOT and OOC, so it'll have to be a few days before and after to send time with people traveling for our wedding.
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  • kmmssgkmmssg mod
    Moderator Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its
    Depending on the size of his company/department I do think he needs to shake a leg here.  If others are putting in for time off and starting to plan vacations he needs to get a move on.
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  • manateehuggermanateehugger member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 5 Answers
    I feel ya. My FI is joining a new unit and has to put in for leave soon. I'm anxious about it. 
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  • Maggie0829Maggie0829 member
    Eighth Anniversary 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    Well I wouldn't worry so much about the days leading up to or the days after as I would to make sure that he is off for the actual wedding day. That is most important.

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  • EverAferEverAfer member
    100 Love Its 100 Comments Name Dropper
    Thanks,are I'm good now. I'm not a yeller usually, but he just floored me.

    I just moved to a new department at work, and they already issued a notice about putting in for time off back in Nov and  they were pretty strict. He's a supervisor at work so it's even harder.

    @PDKH, is the military usually accommodating?
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  • manateehuggermanateehugger member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 5 Answers
    Ha! Maybe you terrified him into doing it asap! Hope it works out well.

    They usually are fairly accommodating with wedding stuff as long as there isn't training or deployment looming, but it's unit dependent apparently. It will probably be fine; he's got plenty of leave saved up, but I'll just be relieved when I know it's been approved. 

    Kmmssg could probably answer that question better than me haha!
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  • kmmssgkmmssg mod
    Moderator Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its
    edited February 2014
    PDKH said:
    Ha! Maybe you terrified him into doing it asap! Hope it works out well.

    They usually are fairly accommodating with wedding stuff as long as there isn't training or deployment looming, but it's unit dependent apparently. It will probably be fine; he's got plenty of leave saved up, but I'll just be relieved when I know it's been approved. 

    Kmmssg could probably answer that question better than me haha!
    Well, I'll try..

    Everything is mission driven.  Units know when they have training exercises/field exercises/important inspections quite far out.  If the mission says you need to be there, you need to be there.

    If someone is getting married it is best to let the chain of command know the plans ASAP and discuss what long range events are known.  If you are a key player in things that are scheduled you won't be getting leave.

    It is imperative for military couples to get a military clause in their vendor contracts.  My DD is marrying a military guy and we have it in our contracts that if the groom is unavailable due to military requirements we can reschedule without a penalty.  They were all great about it.

    In the military you also have to think about certain blocks of time that are popular for leave requests - especially around the holidays.  Planning your wedding around the holidays "can" be a real crapshoot - and it should be.

    Hypothetical situation:  2 guys want leave during December you can only approve one more person to be on leave during this time.  They both ask at the same time.  One is going home to get married and hasn't deployed in a couple of years.  The other one has been deployed 2 out of the last 3 Christmases and didn't get leave on the non-deployed year and his mother has been quite ill.  Which one should get the leave?  The guy getting married had 51 other weekends to choose from and picked a high demand leave request time.  If I were the approving official my sympathy would be the guy with the sick mom.

    That isn't to say that guys don't get approved for leave time for holiday weddings, but when others haven't been home in a few years a wedding doesn't trump everything else.  Pick a non-holiday time when the training calendar is slow and things should look pretty good for you.
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