Wedding Woes

so much drama

well first, my mother in law is insane.  she clearly thinks that I'm taking away her son from her and she can't get over it.  she even yelled at me for over an hour making me cry hysterically because we were going to buy a microwave (yeah, a MICROWAVE) because 'when she got married', she didn't have one and she learned to deal (over 30 years ago).  now, my own mom is going crazy.  I have been asking her for months to help me look for lanterns for my centerpieces and to help me do things for my wedding this may.  since October all I've heard is that she is too busy with other things.  she owns two stores, which are filled with things that people make and my whole wedding is DIY because I have a very small budget.  so now, only 3 months away, she wants to start helping and she says she still doesn't understand my vision when it hasn't hanged for 10 months, its extremely simple, and I've sent her exact pictures at least 2 or 3 times already.  now she doesn't understand why I don't have everything done and since I'm the bride, i'm the one that is supposed to do everything with no help. she says that everything that everything I have picked is way to expensive, even if I try to make it myself.  I tried to make my own tablecloth (the one with the petals) which are way too expensive to buy already made and she told me that if I try to make them, they will look horrible.  Now my dad has to go back onto chemotherapy since he has cancer and I know that she will now not care about the wedding until he takes another break from it.  she actually expects me to drive over an hour on my only day off from work EVERY WEEK to do wedding things with her.  When I told her no since i'm a full time student with a lot of homework, have a full time job, that's the only day i get to actually see my fiancé, and the only day I can clean my house and get things done, she told me that I can do it all myself.  Then she wants to hire someone to decorate the place for us (which will cost a couple hundred dollars) when we already planned on doing it ourselves the day before.  She is always yelling at me about budget and I told her that I'm trying to do everything as cheap as possible then she yells and says that I can't get cheap things because the wedding will look horrible. SHE IS CRAAAAZZZZZYYYYYY!!!!!!! The last part of the horrible story is that my best friend/maid of honor has not talked to me in weeks, every time I ask her if she wants to hang out she says she is busy with work or school and then I see pictures on facebook that she is hanging out with all of her friends and she even met her new boyfriend at a party.  She wasn't even gunna tell me that she had a new boyfriend!!! I haven't even talked to my matron on honor since we picked out bridesmaids dresses back in October.  I try to text, facebook, and call her but I never get a response.  Oh yeah, and the worst part of al of this is, all of this happened and came out within TWO DAYS!!!!!! sorry, that's my venting for the month. I'm not even excited about planning the wedding anymore, everyone has made it a nightmare for months and every time I start to get excited, something happens to where I don't even want to think about it.

Re: so much drama

  • Your post was hard to read because it has no paragraphs, but it looks like you're mad that your mom won't help you with other stuff because, among other reasons, your dad has to get chemotherapy??? Dude, you need to get your priorities in the right order. Your dad's health is way more important than your wedding.

    Other things:

    - No one is responsible for helping out with your wedding, except maybe your fiancé
    - No one cares about your wedding as much as you do
    - If you don't have time/money to do extra things for your wedding, cut them 

  • You created this 'drama'.  So if you don't want it any more, just stop it. 

    And I'm hung up on the fact that your MIL made you cry over a microwave.  Does.not.compute
  • "She wasn't even gunna tell me that she had a new boyfriend!!!"

    image

    Breathe.  

    Stop talking to anyone about the wedding and your plans for it.  

    If mom wants you to drive, have an agenda...I'm doing this, this, this at this time.  Oh you can't make it?  Sorry.

    And 2 days?  Simmer down.
  • You sound young.
    image
  • I started to lose interest at the yelling for an hour, then perked up again at the cancer.  Your father has cancer and you want to whine about an hour drive so she can help you?  Dude, take a step back and look at what you wrote.

  • Once again, MY EYES!! Paragraphs are your friend.
    Daisypath Anniversary tickers
  • You sound young.
    This
  • Op I'd be hurt too if I felt a close friend was blowing me off and I'm sorry about ur fmil but honestly I would take a step back drink some wine and breath. First of all it's disturbing that you are more concerned with your wedding plans being put off because your dad has cancer. I'd be more concerned for my dad and simplify my wedding plans if I had to. As a bride also getting married in May also doing DIY for as much as possible I can tell you it helps to break it down a little at a time. Most if not all my DIY stuff I've done independently especially since my sister is getting married this week my mom had primarily focused on hers. If I waited on her to help me plan I'd literally have very little time to get everything done and within our also tiny budget.

    I can sympathize to a certain extend but all these things are tiny details that can be modified. At the end of the day you'll be married to your best friend and that's what matters
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