Alternative to unity candle, sand, knots, etc.

haleyhicks19 · February 2014

My fiance and I are planning to do the unity candle because it is a tradition. However, we also wanted to do something in addition to that. Sand is an option but I feel that it's almost become overdone. I have read about knots and don't like those ideas. Also, we don't drink so I don't like the wine box idea. I LOVE love love using two colors and painting on a canvas but his sister just got married recently and she did that so I don't want to copy. Suggestions???

artbyallie · February 2014

A wedding is itself a unity ceremony. If you're going to do the candle, yet another 'unity' thing will be pure overkill. You really don't need any at all, but if you're going to do it, you pick one, and it sounds like you've already picked the candle.

We skipped the candle but took communion together (just the two of us) because it was meaningful to us.

HisGirlFriday13 · February 2014

artbyallie said:
A wedding is itself a unity ceremony. If you're going to do the candle, yet another 'unity' thing will be pure overkill. You really don't need any at all, but if you're going to do it, you pick one, and it sounds like you've already picked the candle.

We skipped the candle but took communion together (just the two of us) because it was meaningful to us.

This.

Jen4948 · February 2014

Maybe you can have some readings or music with meaning for you if the purpose is to have a longer ceremony?

But you don't need to add extras to a wedding service to symbolize "unity." The wedding ceremony itself is a "unity" ceremony.

haleyhicks19 · February 2014

I understand that the whole ceremony symbolizes unity. We just wanted something tangible (like the sand, for example) to take with us once the ceremony ends. I guess I'll keep looking...

HisGirlFriday13 · February 2014

haleyhicks19 said:
I understand that the whole ceremony symbolizes unity. We just wanted something tangible (like the sand, for example) to take with us once the ceremony ends. I guess I'll keep looking...

You have each other and probably wedding bands. How much more tangible do you want?

vt&dt · February 2014

If you're doing the unity candle, you'll have that to take with you as well.

I'm not sure why another unity thing is necessary.

MrandMrsMongoose · March 2014

My friend and her husband planted a tree at their wedding. Which they plan to later plant in their future home.

There is also the idea to put a bottle of wine and notes to each other in a box and nail it shut to be opened on a set anniversary.

Jen4948 · March 2014

haleyhicks19 said:

I understand that the whole ceremony symbolizes unity. We just wanted something tangible (like the sand, for example) to take with us once the ceremony ends. I guess I'll keep looking...

Well, you'll have rings, you'll presumably still have your wedding gown and any accessories that go with it, you'll have photos, you'll have any leftover invitations and other things you bought for decorations, serving, etc. Aren't those tangible?

camnick · March 2014

It was very important to my fiance's family to have a unity candle during our ceremony, but our venue is a historic building that is not allowing candles, so we are doing a unity heart. I've also seen crosses that are basically the same idea - there is a base, one person puts the outline onto the base, the other places the decorative inner piece inside the outline, and the couple then seals the two parts together with a pin through them symbolizing unity or the foundation of a family or whatever the couple and the officiant decides it symbolizes. You can then display it in your home and it doesn't have the mess factor associated with the canvas painting (although that does sound really fun!)

AddieCake · March 2014

I can understand wanting to do SOMETHING, but to do the candle AND something else seems a bit much to me. As a guest I would be wondering how many unity moments I was gonna be sitting through.

hutchsl · March 2014

We did a unity candle to symbolize uniting our families and us. By having our family light there candle we got to honor our families. We did a rose ceremony to honor our love and commitment.

ROSE CEREMONY (each take a rose from the vase)<?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" />

<?xml:namespace prefix = v ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:vml" />

Words of the Rose Ceremony:
"Your gift to each other for your wedding today has been your wedding rings - which shall always be an outward demonstration of your vows of love and respect; and a public showing of your commitment to each other.
You now have what remains the most honorable title which may exist between a man and a woman - the title of "husband" and "wife." For your first gift as husband and wife, that gift will be a single rose.
In the past, the rose was considered a symbol of love and a single rose always meant only one thing - it meant the words "I love you." So it is appropriate that for your first gift - as husband and wife - that gift would be a single rose.
Please exchange your first gift as husband and wife.
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In some ways it seems like you have not done anything at all. Just a moment ago you were holding one small rose - and now you are holding one small rose. In some ways, a marriage ceremony is like this. In some ways, tomorrow is going to seem no different than yesterday. But in fact today, just now, you both have given and received one of the most valuable and precious gifts of life - one I hope you always remember - the gift of true and abiding love within the devotion of marriage.
_Susan_ and _Loren_, wherever you make your home in the future - whether it be a large and elegant home - or a small and graceful one - that you both pick one very special location for roses; so that on each anniversary of this truly wonderful occasion you both may take a rose to that spot both as a recommitment to your marriage - and a recommitment that THIS will be a marriage based upon love.
In every marriage there are times where it is difficult to find the right words.
It is easiest to hurt who we most love. It is easiest to be most hurt by who we most love.
It might be difficult some time to words to say "I am sorry" or "I forgive you"; "I need you" or "I am hurting". If this should happen, if you simply cannot find these words, leave a rose at that spot which both of you have selected - for that rose then says what matters most of all and should overpower all other things and all other words.
That rose says the words: "I love you still."
The other should accept this rose for the words which cannot be found, and remember the love and hope that you both share today.
_Susan_ and _Loren_, if there is anything you remember of this marriage ceremony, it is that it was love that brought you here today, it is only love which can make it a glorious union, and it is by love which your marriage shall endure."

Alternative to unity candle, sand, knots, etc.

Re: Alternative to unity candle, sand, knots, etc.

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