favors

dluberts · February 2014

So the fi comes to me last night and asks have I thought about favors at all? I say no because I didnt think we were doing them. He says well, what about like the personalized match boxes (at this point im mortified) but with papers in instead? Now im really floored, I cant believe hes wanting to have rolling paper favors. So I ask, he says NO! Not rolling papers, a notebook! Cue in a homer DOH!for me. So embarrassing story over, I got to thinking about favors and came across seed bombs, what are your takes on this?

tammym1001 · February 2014

That's hilarious! Rolling papers would be so much more awesome. I don't know what a seed bomb is so I don't have an opinion on that.

We are doing bottles of wine as our favors though.

dluberts · February 2014

Seed bombs are little balls, they look like dirt or clay balls, that are a mixture of water clay dirt and flower seeds. You put themin little favor bags, or anything similar, and your guests take them and can tos them anywhere for the seeds to grow

ArtTeacher23 · February 2014

We've got plantable seed paper as our favors. My bridesmaids and I put them together last month - there are 2 flower shaped seed papers on a card that says "love blooms" with our names & date. I love it and its perfect since we're getting married at the botanical garden! I could care less if they actually work & flowers bloom from them (I had gotten something similar a few years ago and it didn't work lol) but its still cute and people can chose whether or not to plant them or keep em in a photo album/scrapbok (cuz I'm like one of the few freaks who saves every memento from other peoples big events & parties lol).

vmj23 · February 2014

someone gave me seed bombs as part of a house warming gift once, i love them, i love the idea of them and i love flowers. I was going to do them, but then put thought into it and decided against it. i know there are people comign to my wedding that live in apartments/condos that woudl have no use for them. and i don't think many of the men will have much interest, so i decided to go the edible route. a friend of mine caters weddings and was at one recently that did seed packets...she said a lot were left behind.

bellaluna290 · February 2014

We're doing edible favors so that they will be taken for sure. Mint chocolate malt balls from a local candy store. If no one wants them, then more for FI and I

Kristen625 · February 2014

We are doing a seed thing. I'm putting some wildflower seeds in organza bags with a card attached that has a quote from st Augustine about love and blooming then planting instructions on the back. I have everything to do it but they won't get put together until the week of the wedding cause I don't know if the seeds will grow if they are exposed to the air for so long.

omargotz · February 2014

We did "mint to be" matchbooks. and put a mint inside. i got a lot of slack on this website saying those were not really favors, and maybe i should just put them in the bathroom, but oh well. they are cute

on the back it says our initials and date

omargotz · February 2014

dluberts · February 2014

I think the other boards are ridicukous. Its your wedding and whatever you choose for your favors shouldnt matter to others. I cant stand how rude and self entitled some women think they are. Makes my blood boil

tammym1001 · February 2014

@omargotz - I remember that thread. I thought your mints were adorable then and I still think they are. Since favors aren't mandatory I don't get why people get all up in arms about what is given out. If they aren't even necessary then if you get something at all you should be happy. There are a lot of double standards on some of the other boards.

dluberts · February 2014

I get in trouble when I go onto the other boards.when these women tell me what I have to do and if I dont im rude or a troll, or my guests will be unhappy I wish I could just go slap them! Lol. Its my wedding, not yours, I am gonna do it my way! Ok so vent over, I like mints, I considered personalized mint tins. But fi wanted to have mint and nut bowls on the tables. I hate the idea of dinner mints and nuts in bowls on our tables, I find it tacky, but it was one of the things he asked for.

omargotz · February 2014

@tammym1001 I know right? I mean it's not like i am required to give them a gift... I thought it was a cute gesture. People are really annoying on this board. Someone asks a legitimate question "where can i cut costs? My dj is expensive and so is my cake" and people lash out and say HAVE A PUNCH AFTERNOON RECEPTION or you dont need a reception.
It's like, clearly she was a night reception and she is looking for advice on small areas... idk it's annoying.

tammym1001 · February 2014

My favorite is when they get all bitchy with girls who complain about their bridal party and they throw out the "a BM only has to show up sober in a dress you picked out". They don't have to talk about your wedding or come to any parties or do anything at all for you. It just makes me laugh because I know they don't have to, but real friends are excited about your wedding and want to do stuff for you because they love you. I can almost guarantee that none of those girls had wedding parties that didn't do a single thing except show up the day of and never talked to them about their weddings, but they expect everyone else to be ok with that. LOL

dluberts · February 2014

I also find it irritating when women post whove already been maried, but still post and comment and are rude. I feel like youve had your day, move on!

bellaluna290 · February 2014

I think I have said this before on this board, but most of the things that are posted today are unicorns and rainbows compared to not that long ago. At the end of the day, when you (general) ask for advice from a bunch of strangers you are going to get a wide range of helpful and not so helpful responses. Take what you want from it. I think hearing from past brides is helpful because it provides perspective. Perspective tends to be missing when you are in the thick of things

tl;dr All that matters after your wedding is that you are married. Don't sweat the small stuff.

omargotz I really like those matchbooks. I've wanted matchbooks at my wedding since I was a kid.

omargotz · February 2014

@bellaluna290 I made them myself. SUPER EASY. if you want to know just ask me!

@tammym1001 Why would they buy a matching dress just to show up in? that seems silly. And it's so far fetched to even say that. The role wouldn't exists if they didn't help.

tammym1001 · February 2014

omargotz said:

@bellaluna290 I made them myself. SUPER EASY. if you want to know just ask me!

@tammym1001 Why would they buy a matching dress just to show up in? that seems silly. And it's so far fetched to even say that. The role wouldn't exists if they didn't help.

I know, but that's the response anyone on this board gets if they ask anything at all about their wedding party doing anything. In the same breath though they will tell people to only pick people for their bridal party that would help them hide a body at 3 am.

So basically they're saying people should help you cover up murders, but they shouldn't help you hand out programs at your wedding. LOL

omargotz · February 2014

People are just so ridiculous. They either believe in a fairy tell budgetless wedding or no reception just a witness and you two. IT's annoying. Just answer the question with helpful advice and not the extremes.

dluberts · February 2014

Thats what I feel like, they think unless you can afford an exorbitantly priced wedding then you dont get a wedding. That you can only have cake and punch with an ipod on a sunday

vmj23 · February 2014

LOL they just have their standard responses to everything, even if that is not the question being asked. I've spent way too much time on here reading posts...but i get bored at work and wedding is the only thing on the brain!

I think there is helpful advice, but certain questions always get the same answers, even if that's not specifically what is asked.

pumpkinsandturkeys · March 2014

I really dislike when things get turned into an "us vs. them" war.

If you ask a question in a public, Internet forum, you're going to get a variety of answers, and because it's all (relatively) anonymous, people are going to be honest, and even a little blunt. You may like/agree with some of those responses, and you may not.

Everyone is certainly welcome to do whatever they please. However, if a topic/issue is brought up that goes against conventional etiquette/tradition, that's going to be pointed out (likely repeatedly). There are going to be people who disagree with taking that route, and they're not going to be shy about telling you why, and also pointing out that there's a good chance that some of your guests may feel the same way (whether they alert you to this or not).

Same goes for BMs -- some women are okay with being cookie cutter Barbie dolls and talking wedding all the time and helping the bride with her every whim (and there's nothing wrong with enjoying all of that), and others want to feel like individuals and as though there is a life outside of Wedding World. This is going to be pointed out, too.

If the same questions keep coming up, the same options are also going to keep coming up; it's just inevitable as there are only so many solutions to a given problem. Trust me -- as tired as you are of seeing the same answers and justifications, people here are just as tired of giving them. However, to not give those answers would be doing this board a disservice as it's representative of both traditional, conventional wisdom and unconventional, modern wisdom.

Finally, I don't know why people take issue with married women staying on the boards (and this issue only seems to come up when someone butts heads with someone else who happens to be married). They've been through the WHOLE wedding process, and they've heard ideas and advice up the wazoo. They've also (generally) been on the boards the longest and have a lot to share because of it. I don't know about you, but I've made some good friends here and I would be sad if I was no longer welcome just because I got married. My love of weddings and enjoying the community we have here isn't going to go away 3 months from now, and I hope that no one throws that in my face down the line.

dluberts · March 2014

Not gonna lie, when my wedding happens ill post pictures and check back on everyone else posting on the may board. But I cant say ill continue to use it more than a few months afterwords, once the wedding upates from others stop ill probably stop too. Not because I dont enjoy the may board but because I wanna progress from the wedding. Move onto planning the next phase of my life.

pumpkinsandturkeys · March 2014

dluberts said:

Not gonna lie, when my wedding happens ill post pictures and check back on everyone else posting on the may board. But I cant say ill continue to use it more than a few months afterwords, once the wedding upates from others stop ill probably stop too. Not because I dont enjoy the may board but because I wanna progress from the wedding. Move onto planning the next phase of my life.

I understand not wanting to feel like you're re-living your wedding every day.

For me, I used to work in the wedding industry, and in the general event planning industry before and after that (prior to my current career). I genuinely find weddings and wedding trends and traditions interesting. That will never change for me.

I also spend time on other boards here and have developed an affinity for some of the other women. We talk about everything under the sun -- a lot of which has nothing to do with weddings or marriage. I've celebrated everything with them, from the fact that it's Friday to people getting new jobs/moving to other big accomplishments, and I've also shared their heartache and allowed them to comfort me during my own hard times. If someone told me that I should leave all of that behind just because I'm already married and this is a wedding website, I would be upset.

KittyKaty20 · March 2014

I'm with @pumpkinsandturkeys- the women-nay, ladies-who post on these boards are doing their best to be honest and unfiltered...something many of our friends don't/can't/won't do.

I'd rather take advice from someone who has had her wedding day. Would I not want a pilot who has flown before to be at the helm of my plane? I have doled out and received advice here; any time I felt upset about a post, I took a breath and realized it was because I was in wrong. Suck it up, buttercup.

Now, if I could just get everyone using proper grammar...

pumpkinsandturkeys · March 2014

KittyKaty20 said:

I'm with @pumpkinsandturkeys- the women-nay, ladies-who post on these boards are doing their best to be honest and unfiltered...something many of our friends don't/can't/won't do.
I'd rather take advice from someone who has had her wedding day. Would I not want a pilot who has flown before to be at the helm of my plane? I have doled out and received advice here; any time I felt upset about a post, I took a breath and realized it was because I was in wrong. Suck it up, buttercup.
Now, if I could just get everyone using proper grammar...

THIS. Although, I'm concerned that this may be an impossible task.

klburke88 · March 2014

Sooo.... I thought I'd share my plans for wedding favors. We are doing 10oz mason jars for each guest with chalkboard labels. The guests can "tag" their jar using these really neat chalk-ink pens I found online, and then use the jar as their glass for the night! Our centerpieces are also mason jars, and there will be several chalkboard signs up around the venue, so I really feel like it ties our whole theme together. Even our invitations and save the dates were chalkboard styled

dluberts · March 2014

Klburke88 that sounds pretty neat!

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