I stopped at the store on my way home from work with full intentions to get ingredients for whole wheat penne with roasted veggies and feta. Left the store with a take and bake pepperoni pizza with included cheesy breadsticks, chocolate covered doughnuts, and moose tracks ice cream. That's it. Got to the register, and the cashier lady says "looks like sleepover food to me" I said, "Oh yes, my son is having a friend spend the night tonight".
I do not have a son, nor any children for that matter. I literally did not even skip a beat making up that lie to cover up the fact that I was going to be gorging on junk food tonight, and I felt so bad about it, I scarfed down a chocolate covered doughnut in the car. And now I just feel bad all around. Excuse while I go eat my pizza and chessy breadsticks, and wash it down with some ice cream. But don't worry, I won't eat it all by my self, my "son and his friend" will help me.
I'm a terrible person.