Not sure if this is the right place but here goes. A close friend from high school is getting married in August. We've known each other for almost 12 years, and she was a bridesmaid in my wedding last June. She asked me to be a bridesmaid and of course I accepted! However since then I have lost two people very close to me in the matter of a month. I'm not myself, I can barely function, and I just don't think I can be a bridesmaid. I can't give the bride 100%, and that's not fair to her at all! However, I'm not sure how to tell her. We've been friends for so long I know she'd understand, but at the same time what if she doesn't? How do I tell her without ruining our friendship?
Re: How to tell the bride no?
This really reminds me of one of my best friends' wedding. I was severely depressed and on medication, and felt so out of it all the time.
I ended up going to her ceremony but had to bail on the reception. Your friend may be hurt that you feel you can't stand up with her, but I'd try your best to be there for her wedding ceremony. I still regret not being there for her reception, but I know it was for the best.
I hope you're back to yourself sooner than later
Tell her exactly what you told us. Tell her that you care about her but worry that you won't be able to be the BM that you think she deserves. If she gets pissy, she's a lousy friend. Otherwise, tell her what you can handle right now and go from there.
You're going through a terrible time and this should not be another cause for stress.
I would tell your friend that you are very happy for her, but you are dealing with so many major personal issues that you aren't able to give her the attention and care that she should get from her bridesmaids, so you feel the best thing for you to do is to step down. But if you can do anything for her at all, even if not as a bridesmaid, I would offer to do it.