Mrs.Marende- Yes, I think you should pay for parking. I have never been to a wedding where I had to pay for parking, and, lets be honest, I have some friends with 'horrible etiquette'.
Michelle5736- As I stated to MrsMarende, I've been to many etiquette fail weddings. I have never once told the bride that their wedding sucked or that I thought they were rude. Your friends & family probably won't tell you either. No one is telling you this to be mean. You're on the etiquette section of a wedding website and etiquette says it's rude to make guests pay for anything at your wedding.
Ha I read your previous post "miss so called Boston" your getting married in the middle of no where so you know nothing about a Boston Wedding. I don't even know where that town is haha, and then you comment on my issue like you know what your talking about? Message boards are lame...get real. You honestly think I care? Wow. Goodluck.
I couldn't afford to get married in Boston proper. I checked out venues that were borderline in our price range, and we decided we'd rather go outside the city than be bad hosts. Sharon is on the commuter rail and is considered Boston area.
I did my research. I live in Boston. I wouldn't know about your issues? I didn't realize you were such a special snowflake.
Ha I read your previous post "miss so called Boston" your getting married in the middle of no where so you know nothing about a Boston Wedding. I don't even know where that town is haha, and then you comment on my issue like you know what your talking about? Message boards are lame...get real. You honestly think I care? Wow. Goodluck.
Who are you talking to? Are you talking about @phira, because I believe she is getting married in Waltham (correct me if I'm wrong). If you haven't heard of Waltham, you must not be from around here. And who cares if you haven't heard of the town she is getting married; her wedding will be etiquette appropriate and yours will not be. 40 dollars for parking (even in Boston) is outrageous, unless you're getting married near Fenway during a Red Sox game! It sounds like it's out of your price range, and you should have looked at other places. Just because you can afford the per person cost of dinner doesn't mean you can afford the venue.
ETA: Ok, Sharon not Waltham, but the rest of my comment stands.
Seriously...if I showed up to a wedding $20 is NOTHING to park in the city. I'm not that cheap, that I'd complain about $20. Your showing up to a $250 pp plated dinner wedding. I provided transportation to and from the church, so people don't have to fight traffic to and from the church. That is not required as there is parking available. I'd pay it and enjoy myself, because I pay $40-60 to park every time I want to park my car in the city to go eat dinner, if I take it. Hence, what my family is saying. My wedding planner is a BOSTON wedding planner, she knows what's she's doing. It's optional, but usually a very last minute decision by the B&G. We may or we may not, depending on how we feel.
Your not comparing apples when you say Sharon is Boston. Sharon is very far to me, Boston area is a T ride (not the commuter rail). The only comparison to Boston is Cambridge, in terms of venues. Yes, I could have picked an outside the city wedding venue and saved a ton of money, but then I would have made people drive much farther to a venue, which is awful. The wedding probably wouldn't have been as nice either. My issues were followed by the comment you made "Oh I'm from Boston, I'm a good host, people don't pay to park". Your unfairly commenting on something you know nothing about, but nice try.
Waltham yes...still not Boston. Sharon is the place i've never heard of and that is very far! Have you parked at the any garage in back bay? Prudential/Copley? Any hotel?
Here are the rates FYI:
Daily Rates
0 to 1 Hour $10.00 1 to 1.5 Hours $20.00 1.5 to 2 Hours $30.00 2 to 10 Hours $38.00 10 to 24 Hours $40.00
Seriously...if I showed up to a wedding $20 is NOTHING to park in the city. I'm not that cheap, that I'd complain about $20. Your showing up to a $250 pp plated dinner wedding. I provided transportation to and from the church, so people don't have to fight traffic to and from the church. That is not required as there is parking available. I'd pay it and enjoy myself, because I pay $40-60 to park every time I want to park my car in the city to go eat dinner, if I take it. Hence, what my family is saying. My wedding planner is a BOSTON wedding planner, she knows what's she's doing. It's optional, but usually a very last minute decision by the B&G. We may or we may not, depending on how we feel.
Your not comparing apples when you say Sharon is Boston. Sharon is very far to me, Boston area is a T ride (not the commuter rail). The only comparison to Boston is Cambridge, in terms of venues. Yes, I could have picked an outside the city wedding venue and saved a ton of money, but then I would have made people drive much farther to a venue, which is awful. The wedding probably wouldn't have been as nice either. My issues were followed by the comment you made "Oh I'm from Boston, I'm a good host, people don't pay to park". Your unfairly commenting on something you know nothing about, but nice try.
Part of the point is that just because you aren't offended (or wouldn't be as a guest) doesn't mean it is okay. Etiquette isn't about what offends you, but treating your guests right. 40 dollars for parking is obscene. I would never imagine paying that much, and if I showed up to a wedding and it cost that much to park, it is very likely that the cash I budgeted to give you and you Husband would be less. It is also likely that I would bitch and complain about it for days or we might be late searching for a cheaper place to park. All of those might be rude, but I am a college student who budgets every dollar I spend so instead of coming from groceries it would come from gifts. And I would never ever let you hear me complain or tell you. I would just think it was rude for choosing a venue that would cost me money to attend.
Sharon is 30 minutes from Boston and on the commuter rail.
I've been parking in Boston my whole life. Most game day parking around Fenway is about $20-30, which is considered a price gouge. Parking near the Pru (near Symphony Hall, where I used to park all the time) is $20 for event parking.
My cousin, who is getting married in Copley, was able to argue her venue down to $7 for parking.
Sharon is 30 minutes from Boston and on the commuter rail.
I've been parking in Boston my whole life. Most game day parking around Fenway is about $20-30, which is considered a price gouge. Parking near the Pru (near Symphony Hall, where I used to park all the time) is $20 for event parking.
My cousin, who is getting married in Copley, was able to argue her venue down to $7 for parking.
Good 30 minutes, but not a comparison. If you can get by "T" it is probably considered Metro Boston. I don't know what venue your "cousin" is getting married at in Copley? I looked at every venue around Copley, there is no wayyyyy she got parking down to $7. I argued and argued with multiple venues, venues who charged far more than mine. My venue charged $30, and it is now $20. The lowest was for the lenox $18, fairmont was $35, Omni Parker $42, etc. Sheraton $17. You could usually knock $5 off, but high end places no way, because they could fill your weekend in June for someone who wouldn't care.
Maybe she got married on a off day or season? Not a Saturday, in June? I lived near Fenway, those gas stations charge $40-60 on any game. There are signs posted and I walked by them on almost a daily basis.
I never said $40, the parking is $20. My friends who some are still in college, pay parking to attend school daily. Most take the T and probably will for my wedding. I pay daily, now that I moved out of the city and bought a house, to go to work $10/daily. When I have asked around, most people say don't bother! People pay all the time, no big deal.
Like I said...as it gets closer I may decide to comp it. I'm certainly not telling people beforehand, as I think it is good people carpool. More people will get a DD instead.
I don't appreciate the things you said either, I was trying to be nice. I asked you to stop and you continued on. So just agree to disagree? I just honestly find it so hard to believe, I mean $7 is a steal! Great for her if she could talk them down that much. I found that most venues in the city had that "I can do whatever I want, get whoever I want attitude". There was not much room for negotiation, because a year and a half out, they were already booked up for June 2015.
I agree maybe it isn't the 100% perfect host...but I have yet to go to a wedding where someone has. Again, we may pick up the parking, but i'm not convinced yet. Will talk to some other Boston brides with similar venues. I'd rather people carpool to think they are saving money, have a DD, and then get a lucky surprise at the exit. Good luck on your wedding!
Maybe your attitude was so atrocious, they didn't want to help you get a better rate. Look, it's expensive to park in the city, and you chose to have your wedding there, not your guests. It's not fair for them to pay 20 or 40 dollars to attend your wedding. And there are plenty of parking garages that are only 10-15 dollars after 5pm. Of course if you're parking at the prudential you're going to get gauged.
Also people in the wedding business (like your planner) may not be concerned with proper etiquette, because they care about getting your money.
Also, no I don't park in those ridiculously high priced places, because I know where to park that is cheaper, or I take the bus or T from my house or work. People coming from out of town won't have that luxury.
I don't appreciate the things you said either, **I was trying to be nice**. I asked you to stop and you continued on. So just agree to disagree? I just honestly find it so hard to believe, I mean $7 is a steal! Great for her if she could talk them down that much. I found that most venues in the city had that "I can do whatever I want, get whoever I want attitude". There was not much room for negotiation, because a year and a half out, they were already booked up for June 2015.
**I agree maybe it isn't the 100% perfect host...but I have yet to go to a wedding where someone has.** Again, we may pick up the parking, but i'm not convinced yet. Will talk to some other Boston brides with similar venues. I'd rather people carpool to think they are saving money, have a DD, and then get a lucky surprise at the exit. Good luck on your wedding!
I'd hate to see you when you're not trying to be nice.
And it is almost worse that you're admitting that you're not being a good host and are okay with it because people have done it to you. What if your guests don't have cash on them? How are they supposed to attend your wedding? They may end up intterupting your ceremony having to go retrieve cash. Which would make them appear rude at your fault.
I don't mean to derail this...conversation (seriously, where's my wine and popcorn??), but $40 for parking? HOLY FBALLS! That is crazypants! I think entire Boston should form a union and then go on strike against such crazy prices. There is no way I would be going to that wedding unless I could get there by public transportation.
They only do valet parking it is $17 for event parking and $39 per night.
Etiquette wise should we be paying for all parking?
First, this is totally standard pricing in Boston. I never drive downtown (because of this), but if someone is picking me up and driving downtown, I expect to pay around $30 for parking for the evening. I'd think $17 was a great deal.
I'm confused about one thing--you say you are providing transportation from the church to the reception and back? So, is the parking only for people who are not taking that transportation? Or is this the price to park at the church?
Either way, not knowing exactly what your venue is, I'd post information on the website that would say something like: "Valet parking is available at the reception for $17. There is a garage approximately 3 blocks away where you can self-park for $12. You can always look for free on-street parking and hope you get lucky, but it's a very popular area! The venue is also accessible by the Green and Red T lines, and the #9 bus, with only about a 1 block walk. For those of you staying at the XYZ Hotel, it's approximately a $10 taxi ride."
I've stated before on other threads that if paid parking is the ONLY option then the hosts should pay for it for their guests. But if there are any number of ways you expect your guests to attend then you shouldn't have to pay. Driving to and parking at a city venue is an extravagance, and if there are other options I don't think you have to pay for your guests extravagances. If a guest wanted to take a limo, would you have to pay for that too?! Or the guests who take a taxi? What about your other guests train fare? If your guests have plenty of transportation options, you shouldn't just pick one (i.e. the valet parking) and pay for that one.
@Michelle5736 - if you think that anything you can't get to on the T (not commuter rail) is not considered part of Boston, you need to look around a little more. And if you've never heard of Sharon, you need to get out more. It is a major town just outside of Boston.
I really hate when people act like they know everything about an area and then clearly show their ignorance.
As to the topic at hand - I admit I didn't pay for parking for my guests. For a number of reasons - part of which was because our venue didn't have parking, they would have needed to use several different garages and street parking and I would have no way of knowing where they were parking to try to coordinate that. Additionally, I've never had parking paid for, to me I consider it part of the travel costs of going to a wedding and would not think it rude that B&G didn't pay for it.
I can see from this discussion that I was wrong and it was probably my biggest etiquette faux pas of the wedding.
Well, thank you as now I do not think that $20-30 for parking is a lot for an evening out regularly. My church is about 1/2 mile a way from the venue, had limited spots like 30. Then there are street spots, but those are first come first serve. There is some free and metered spots, but just seemed more of a hassle than to just hope on a shuttle. I have planned on getting buses to pick people up at the venue (where the $20 valet is) and drop them off at the church (1/2 mile away). Also, we have just thought to do it as we pay for the parking at the venue, and who makes it to the church does on their own (and not supply buses). Also, we could hire one bus (giving them options), which would result in more waiting, and comp the parking too. I chose to make the transportation 100% perfect by providing more than one bus and to get people there and back very quick. We avoided a wedding gap (which we would have had at our less expensive church) and provided quick transportation.
I have a few other options, but have yet to find a garage within reasonable distance less than what our valet is right in copley. The common garage is $11 after 5p, but our mass is at 4p. It is also a few blocks, not sure it is worth it to save $9, but will recommend. Per the venue the wedding has to end at 11p, so having a 6p ceremony is out of the question. There is street parking, but you would be required to feed the meter every two hours till 8p. Which is an option, but seems more hassle during a wedding than it is worth. My parents are planning to take the commuter rail and my MOH is taking the T. It is also right off the green line and I have recommended to people who are getting a hotel, to utilize the commuter rail/T as they can change at the hotel.
@MrsMack-again that is how I see it as usual travel cost to go in and out of the city for an evening. What would annoy me as a guest is trying to find church parking, waiting for long periods outside for a bus, and/or a wedding gap. Not necessarily parking, because I am use to it. I have the option to take the T, but wouldn't want to in a dress/heels. I've never had parking paid for either, and many weddings i've attended had some sort of cash bar which is rude, which we paid well over $20 in drinks for. So, I guess this is where I am basing my grounds on parking and the fact no one has said anything about it. I'm planning to make it known (if in the end we decide not to comp it) so no surprises, either people choose not to come, give us less in a gift, or pay it and be fine with it. So far the consensus from guest has been no issues with the parking cost and don't bother comping it. If after talking with Boston venue brides who are dealing with the same issue, and the majority are paying, then we will be too.
Well, thank you as now I do not think that $20-30 for parking is a lot for an evening out regularly. My church is about 1/2 mile a way from the venue, had limited spots like 30. Then there are street spots, but those are first come first serve. There is some free and metered spots, but just seemed more of a hassle than to just hope on a shuttle. I have planned on getting buses to pick people up at the venue (where the $20 valet is) and drop them off at the church (1/2 mile away). Also, we have just thought to do it as we pay for the parking at the venue, and who makes it to the church does on their own (and not supply buses). Also, we could hire one bus (giving them options), which would result in more waiting, and comp the parking too. I chose to make the transportation 100% perfect by providing more than one bus and to get people there and back very quick. We avoided a wedding gap (which we would have had at our less expensive church) and provided quick transportation.
I have a few other options, but have yet to find a garage within reasonable distance less than what our valet is right in copley. The common garage is $11 after 5p, but our mass is at 4p. It is also a few blocks, not sure it is worth it to save $9, but will recommend. Per the venue the wedding has to end at 11p, so having a 6p ceremony is out of the question. There is street parking, but you would be required to feed the meter every two hours till 8p. Which is an option, but seems more hassle during a wedding than it is worth. My parents are planning to take the commuter rail and my MOH is taking the T. It is also right off the green line and I have recommended to people who are getting a hotel, to utilize the commuter rail/T as they can change at the hotel.
@MrsMack-again that is how I see it as usual travel cost to go in and out of the city for an evening. What would annoy me as a guest is trying to find church parking, waiting for long periods outside for a bus, and/or a wedding gap. Not necessarily parking, because I am use to it. I have the option to take the T, but wouldn't want to in a dress/heels. I've never had parking paid for either, and many weddings i've attended had some sort of cash bar which is rude, which we paid well over $20 in drinks for. So, I guess this is where I am basing my grounds on parking and the fact no one has said anything about it. I'm planning to make it known (if in the end we decide not to comp it) so no surprises, either people choose not to come, give us less in a gift, or pay it and be fine with it. So far the consensus from guest has been no issues with the parking cost and don't bother comping it. If after talking with Boston venue brides who are dealing with the same issue, and the majority are paying, then we will be too.
If the majority were racists, would you be one too?
Of course not...I have read multiple post on here, that is kind of conflicting with a similar scenario. One a few years back, which some of these responders have posted on. So, it seems people can easily get to my venue by public transportation, but because people choose to drive, I should pay the garage? I'll probably be taking the T to the venue myself. So if I choose to take public transportation (as the bride) why should I pay for everyone else to get the garage, when i'm not even doing it myself? There are options, there are also options to park at the church for free/public transportation, but i'm supplying buses for convenience.
Of course not...I have read multiple post on here, that is kind of conflicting with a similar scenario. One a few years back, which some of these responders have posted on. So, it seems people can easily get to my venue by public transportation, but because people choose to drive, I should pay the garage? I'll probably be taking the T to the venue myself. So if I choose to take public transportation (as the bride) why should I pay for everyone else to get the garage, when i'm not even doing it myself? There are options, there are also options to park at the church for free/public transportation, but i'm supplying buses for convenience.
You are taking the train to your wedding? How are you going to get your gifts home? Let me guess "all the Boston venue brides" said it's cool to put no boxed gifts on the invite too??
I got married in Manhattan (is that a good enough comparison for you....go Yanks), it cost $25 per car for parking (with our discount). We paid it, not our guests. Bottom line is that your guests should not have to open their wallets to attend your wedding. That is proper hosting, regardless of whether or not you choose to take public transportation....which I'd highly discourage you to do..
Re: Parking
Bullying would be if we posted this in response to your posts (which we didn't do.) :
0 to 1 Hour $10.00
1 to 1.5 Hours $20.00
1.5 to 2 Hours $30.00
2 to 10 Hours $38.00
10 to 24 Hours $40.00
And it is almost worse that you're admitting that you're not being a good host and are okay with it because people have done it to you. What if your guests don't have cash on them? How are they supposed to attend your wedding? They may end up intterupting your ceremony having to go retrieve cash. Which would make them appear rude at your fault.
I really hate when people act like they know everything about an area and then clearly show their ignorance.
As to the topic at hand - I admit I didn't pay for parking for my guests. For a number of reasons - part of which was because our venue didn't have parking, they would have needed to use several different garages and street parking and I would have no way of knowing where they were parking to try to coordinate that. Additionally, I've never had parking paid for, to me I consider it part of the travel costs of going to a wedding and would not think it rude that B&G didn't pay for it.
I can see from this discussion that I was wrong and it was probably my biggest etiquette faux pas of the wedding.