Just a little sad about someone saying they won't be attending....UPDATE Oh Shit.

grumbledore · March 2014

Well at least don't get them a gift. She sucks. You are a way better person than I am.

cruffino · March 2014

She sucks. Dump her. How selfish!

mollyringwald15 · March 2014

I didn't read your previous posts but it sounds like you have been nothing but honest and supportive as she has gone through her planning process. That was a horrible thing for her to have said, I would have been infuriated.

It seems this friendship is very one-sided. Kudos to you for staying in the wedding, but you have every right to be hurt. I would say something to her. She can't undo it, and she still may decline the invitation, but she needs to be called out for this bs.

MobKaz · March 2014

PennyBlossom2311 said:

So as you all know, I am the MOH for a friend's wedding. It's been a wacky and stressful ride, to say the least. We came to blows after her wedding talk consumed every single econversation, at all hours of the day and night. I took everyone's advice and had a serious come-to-Jesus meeting with her about being overwhelmed. I have not engaged in wedding talk except for on our Wednesday meetings. Things have settled down quite a bit. We now have weekly wedding Wednesdays where we meet for coffee and discuss nothing but, flowers, colors, hair pieces, etc. So....a good change of pace.
A few months back she changed her wedding date and went from three months before my wedding to two weeks before which will make things a touch hectic since that week is moving week and I will be in the middle of moving to another state and preparing preparing for summer finals. After talking to the ladies here, I decided to not back out and FI and I will make a day trip home for the wedding. While it will be a touch nutty, I am glad the ladies here helped me realize this is really important to her we can squeeze a day trip down and will make it work. (Sudden surprises don't always help with rational decision making (lol) and I appreciate everyone who offered some prespective.)
Well.....yesterday she told me she probably wouldn't come to my wedding (which is four months away). She will have gotten back from her honeymoon a week prior and will probably still be really worn out. It's dumb, I know, but it really stung. I am probably being sensitive, but for some reason it hurt my feelings a lot more than I expected. It felt like she said "Hey, I'll be home and be available but, I'll be too tired to take a day to attend your wedding. You've been there every step of the way for the last year and even though you did all you could to make this special, I don't care. I also don't care that you also took time to make a seven hour one way drive to attend my wedding during your moving week. But even though my wedding will be over, I'm going to be too busy relaxing after the honeymoon."
I know I'm being sensitive, and silly, and taking something to heart that I shouldn't, but it just made me really sad.....that is all. It's like she wants me for her wedding but because she won't be the bride anymore she can't be bothered to attend. Idk kind of a poo feeling. Maybe I'm reading that wrong but it's really how it came across..... Anyway, thanks for listening...my mini pitty party is over.

**STUCK in box.......
I applaud your character in taking the high road. However, I would absolutely be taking my Wednesdays back. I would finish what I had started as far as the bachelorette party, and wash my hands of anything and everything else.

PennyBlossom2311 · March 2014

Thanks ladies, I appreciate the kind words and the fabulously snarky ways to handle the nutty bride. I think I'm going to follow good on my word and go through with the bachelorette and the wedding day. I did promise to be there and I can at least do that. But, I will take PP advice and do nothing more.

I'm sure there will be more to come and I will keep everyone posted...I am pretty excited to share the pictures of the BM outfits...can we say ice blue/very very light turquoise, one shouldered, taffeta, calf length dresses with little circular sprays of crystals (not tooooo terribly bad. Just take off 6 inches of fabric, add a pair of nude heels, and a little pill pox hat and we look like Jackie O....) but sadly we must all wear royal blue ballerina flats...covered in glitter. We can't be taller than the bride..never mind I'm already 5 inches taller....I shall be loading pictures from the fitting. At least it'll be fun to snark "privately" with ya'll

hikebikebemerry · March 2014

@PennyBlossom2311

PLEASE GIVE US ALL THE UPDATES!

I am sorry that she's being a jerkface, but I give you credit for being the bigger person. I'm pissed just thinking about it! At least you have some boundaries now with just doing coffee on Wednesdays.

You should bake her cookies or something for the honeymoon, but lace them with a laxative. And when she gets back, make tons of puns about poop.

Such as:

"Was the cruise a poopular one?"

Sorry for being a seven year old boy.

PennyBlossom2311 · March 2014

OMG @hikebikebemerry ! Best thing I've heard all day!

FiancB · March 2014

Is this the one that was texting 800 times a day over wedding crap?

Fuck that noise. I would understand if she was still gone for the HM, but not only will she back but she'll have been back for a week. She doesn't have to be there all day and night or whatever but being there for your ceremony is not much to ask especially after all she put you through.

I don't think it's too late to back out. Screw that. I know weddings aren't tit for tat and whatnot but that is ridiculous. You are not being sensitive or silly. You are being a doormat for a shitty friend.

PennyBlossom2311 · March 2014

The one and only....

PennyBlossom2311 · March 2014

@GlitterWitch22 - Thanks! I can at least take my snarky frustration here

abl13 · March 2014

I bet she gets pregnant right after the wedding to keep the focus on her!

FiancB · March 2014

abl13 said:

I bet she gets pregnant right after the wedding to keep the focus on her!

Or maybe a little before to make sure she gets her BFP in time. Then naturally she will post pics of the pee stick on facebook.

ZiggyZos · March 2014

I can't even imagine putting so much effort into a friendship that is so clearly one-sided. And you're taking it a hell of a lot better than I would be.

FWIW, my MOH got married 3 weeks before me. I was her MOH, too, so DH (then FI) and I drove 18 hours round trip to be sure we were there for her rehearsal and her wedding. She got back from her honeymoon the Sunday before my wedding. Her DH had to work the week of our wedding, but she drove the 9 hours to my house to be there for my last-minute Wednesday bachelorette, our Thursday rehearsal, and our Friday wedding before driving 9 hours back home (hungover) on Saturday so she could be back to help with farm chores Sunday and work on Monday.

Your "friend" is being a twatwaffle.

Just a little sad about someone saying they won't be attending....UPDATE Oh Shit.

Re: Just a little sad about someone saying they won't be attending....UPDATE Oh Shit.

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