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Food and Cakes

Thinking of skipping the cake - kind of?

FI and I attended a bridal show at our venue on Sunday, they had this AMAZING dessert bar with all "cocktail desserts" 

Here are some pictures:

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We loved it and would like to include it at our reception. This was obviously not in the original budget, but I started thinking about how much we would enjoy this and I think our guests would have more fun with this than just passed cake. Our cake budget is also very small and the cake would have been very simple, the bar is much nicer overall and provides options. 

FI said he would still like for us to feed each other cake and is worried we will miss out on it. My idea was to have a very small tier made up just for cake cutting and we can feed each other the cake, the staff can cut it up and place the slices on the table with the cocktail desserts and open the dessert bar. 

My worry is there will not be enough cake for each person to have a slice. I don't want to come off as rude by having something that not all of my guests can enjoy. At the same time the cocktail desserts will not be one for each person either. There is really no reason to have 80 of each type, I don't think anyone wants to have 4 desserts but there will be plenty for everyone to be able to try possibly 2 things and some can have cake. 

Is this idea totally nuts?

Re: Thinking of skipping the cake - kind of?

  • Maggie0829Maggie0829 Ravens & Bohs & Crabs & O's member
    Eighth Anniversary 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    If those are very small shot glass sized desserts (like 3 bites max) you can bet your butt I would want to try each one so you should definitely have enough of each so all your guests can try each kind. Also, if you have cake then you should have enough for each guest to have a slice. Why not feed each other one of the cocktail desserts?

    lc07
  • Most of the cocktail desserts are full size I would say more dessert than most cake slices I've received at weddings., only one is a shooter. 

    So if each person should get a slice of cake and each dessert than I need 350 desserts for 70 guests. Does that seem like a lot? I want to host everyone properly but I also don't want to be wasteful. 


  • Jen4948Jen4948 Houston member
    10000 Comments Seventh Anniversary 500 Love Its 25 Answers

    Most of the cocktail desserts are full size I would say more dessert than most cake slices I've received at weddings., only one is a shooter. 

    So if each person should get a slice of cake and each dessert than I need 350 desserts for 70 guests. Does that seem like a lot? I want to host everyone properly but I also don't want to be wasteful. 


    You never know who is going to want to consume what.  But as you yourself pointed out, the appearance of a dessert that not everyone can have would be rude.  If you want to host everyone properly, I'd make sure everyone can get at least one slice of cake and one dessert and worry less about wastefulness.  This is not to say that I don't sympathize with your desire not to spend money on food items that don't get consumed, but don't do that at the expense of disappointing guests.  I like Maggie's idea of you and your FI exchanging cocktail desserts rather than cake and just skipping cake altogether.
  • My point was more if we do a slice of cake for every one, do I need to have one of each cocktail dessert for everyone as well equaling 350 desserts for 70 people. 


  • Have you priced those out yet? My BIL is a wedding caterer and those are very popular, but also expensive because of the work that goes into making each individual cake shot. Since as others have said, it's impossible to know who will want what, it'd be much easier to simplify your choices. Just do cake and a cake shot, or two flavors of cake shot. Then you only need to order 70 of each (140 servings total).
  • Yes I spoke to our venue about the cost. It is not cheap, but I have enough left in the food budget to do so, we invited about 30 people from overseas and almost all have told us they will not be able to make it. We are paying $286 per person so much is left over. 

    I'm more just wondering if it is just too much food. 

    4 tray passed apps
    4 course meal
    late night snacks
    desserts
  • Maggie0829Maggie0829 Ravens & Bohs & Crabs & O's member
    Eighth Anniversary 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    Yes I spoke to our venue about the cost. It is not cheap, but I have enough left in the food budget to do so, we invited about 30 people from overseas and almost all have told us they will not be able to make it. We are paying $286 per person so much is left over. 

    I'm more just wondering if it is just too much food. 

    4 tray passed apps
    4 course meal
    late night snacks
    desserts
    Depends on the length of your reception.  But if I were you I would rather beef up the apps and get rid of the late night snacks since you will have so many different options for dessert.

  • Yes I spoke to our venue about the cost. It is not cheap, but I have enough left in the food budget to do so, we invited about 30 people from overseas and almost all have told us they will not be able to make it. We are paying $286 per person so much is left over. 

    I'm more just wondering if it is just too much food. 

    4 tray passed apps
    4 course meal
    late night snacks
    desserts
    Depends on the length of your reception.  But if I were you I would rather beef up the apps and get rid of the late night snacks since you will have so many different options for dessert.
    I was thinking something similar. If we do the dessert bar I think the late night snacks may be too much our Cocktail Hour starts at 5:30 and the event runs until 12pm. 
  • We had similar food to you but swap late night snack for cookie bar.  We had 110 total but DH and I didn't actually eat any dessert.

    For dessert we had 48 slices of chocolate cheesecake, 48 slices of vanilla with cherry cheesecake, and about 60-70 slices of cake.  All dessert slices were a decent size. 

    We cut the cake upon entering the reception.  It was then sliced and put on the dessert buffet with the cheesecake slices.  There was a break between dinner and the dessert buffet opening.  We also had take home boxes for the desserts and cookies.  At the end of the night I'm guessing we had 50 slices of dessert left over about equal amounts of each type. 

    Since your cake will be on a buffet side by side with the other choices I don't think you need a slice for everyone.  Personally as a guest I woudn't eat the cake with those other choices available.  If you are doing about 2 cocktail desserts per person and they are of decent size I think you can be OK with cake to serve 60-70% for a total of just over 2.5 desserts per person.  With this said, it might not be much more to get a slightly larger cake to serve 100% so it is worth checking. 

    I would also print up menus and put at least one on each table.  We did these DIY on regular paper.  My DH doesn't have a huge sweet tooth but he likes to eat.  If he knew a yummy late night snack was coming up he would probably eat fewer desserts.

  • Maggie0829Maggie0829 Ravens & Bohs & Crabs & O's member
    Eighth Anniversary 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 25 Answers

    Yes I spoke to our venue about the cost. It is not cheap, but I have enough left in the food budget to do so, we invited about 30 people from overseas and almost all have told us they will not be able to make it. We are paying $286 per person so much is left over. 

    I'm more just wondering if it is just too much food. 

    4 tray passed apps
    4 course meal
    late night snacks
    desserts
    Depends on the length of your reception.  But if I were you I would rather beef up the apps and get rid of the late night snacks since you will have so many different options for dessert.
    I was thinking something similar. If we do the dessert bar I think the late night snacks may be too much our Cocktail Hour starts at 5:30 and the event runs until 12pm. 
    Yeah I would add more apps (maybe some stationed or set out apps instead of more passed apps) and if you want you could include some popcorn, mixed nuts and maybe pretzels sticks or mini soft pretzels with your desserts just in case some people want something salty with their sweet.

  • Thanks for the great ideas ladies
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