Funny way to enter the ceremony wanted... for last of 5 best guy friends to get married-

mad060203 · March 2014

Hello all! My fiance is the last of a group of 5 guys who have been best friends for their whole lives. I would like to find a way to symbolicly acknowledge this fact in a funny amusing way but I am sort of at a loss. It doesnt have to be extravagant but the fact that we are getting married is a VERY BIG DEAL, because the group of them were all so sure that Brad would never get married. Has anyone seen any unique ways of presenting a groom at the ceremony? We are very laid back and very non conforming so we are up for anything especially if it gets a good laugh out of our guests. We have 4GM (all best friends with the groom) and 2BM (my two sisters one of which is married to one of the GMs). All suggestions welcome!

OBX2011 · March 2014

mad060203 said: Hello all! My fiance is the last of a group of 5 guys who have been best friends for their whole lives. I would like to find a way to symbolicly acknowledge this fact in a funny amusing way but I am sort of at a loss. It doesnt have to be extravagant but the fact that we are getting married is a VERY BIG DEAL, because the group of them were all so sure that Brad would never get married. Has anyone seen any unique ways of presenting a groom at the ceremony? We are very laid back and very non conforming so we are up for anything especially if it gets a good laugh out of our guests. We have 4GM (all best friends with the groom) and 2BM (my two sisters one of which is married to one of the GMs). All suggestions welcome!

**I agree with PP. A wedding ceremony isn't the best place to do this. As laid back as you may be, a ceremony is a very personal and private moment to share with your closest friends and family....not to have some cool intro for the groom. If you were to do anything, I would save it for the reception when everyone will be in a laid back kind of mood....and even then, I am not a fan of it. This is your wedding day...the day you join your lives together and it is a very sacred moment for you to share with one another. Not for the groomsmen to mock or make fun of their long time buddy who IS getting married.

ETA--TK is stupid today

mad060203 · March 2014

Thanks for your reply Shrekspeare. As I said I welcome all suggestions and it does truly help to see the other side of things; a different perspective if you will. With that said, both my family and his family are very well aware that comedy and laughter are very important parts of our life. This is not an attempt to be rude in any way. It is more of a celebration of the fact that we found each other and that he realized that he wants to share his life with another person; a way for his friends (who are all already married) to usher him into this new life on his wedding day, to the life of wedded bliss and all the crazy happy goodness that comes with being married; a passing of the torch so to speak. I am proud of the fact that he has choosen me and proposed to me after he adamantly stated that he would never marry and again we feel that this should be celebrated! He found the love of his life! I know our guests and family and what they would or would not be comfortable with as we have shared our lives together, I know that they would not be put off by comedy, in fact they would welcome it compared to a tradional ceremony processional. We feel that life should be enjoyed with laughter and if we can bring some of that into our first steps of our new life together then we welcome it with open arms.

Thank you again for your input though. I do truly appreciate your thoughts. :-)

KatWAG · March 2014

Another vote for this is a bad idea. I would never want to broadcast the fast that H never wanted to get married.

What are you going to do? Have GMs use a lasso and drag him into the ceremony? Do you think you will still find all this funny in 20 years?

whitney37354 · March 2014

I don't think there should be anything "funny" in a wedding ceremony. It's a solumn occasion. I did attend a wedding where they walked out after there ceremony to "At Last". This might be a bit more appropriate that what you are thinking of doing now.

kmmssg · March 2014

Is your wedding taking place in a church? Most will not allow clowning around at the altar as it is the most holy place in the sanctuary.

CMGragain · March 2014

Have you ever told a joke that has fallen flat, leaving you feeling foolish? That is how you will feel if you go through with this plan. If I were a guest, I would be offended by any disrespectful clowning during the ceremony. Save it for the reception - maybe.

ZiggyZos · March 2014

CMGragain said:

Have you ever told a joke that has fallen flat, leaving you feeling foolish? That is how you will feel if you go through with this plan. If I were a guest, I would be offended by any disrespectful clowning during the ceremony. Save it for the reception - maybe.

Trying to incorporate something intentionally funny into the ceremony like what you describe will result in exactly what CMG is stating.

You're much better off walking out to a funny song (like At Last, as mentioned above) or finding some organic way to make the ceremony fit with you and your FI, rather than forcing it.

DH and I are a very laid back couple. Our relationship is full of pranks, jokes, etc. Our reverend was very aware of this and told us at our rehearsal that he would follow our lead - if we were serious and stone-faced, he would keep the ceremony that way. If we were giggling and having fun with it, he would too. Everyone was so lighthearted come our ceremony, that the reverend was able to crack a few off-the-cuff remarks in the moment that had our guests laughing without it taking away from the ceremony.

I don't necessarily think ceremonies have to be solemn - it's a happy occasion. But I think there is a big difference between forced "comedy" and genuine enjoyment/joyful humor. The former will make people uncomfortable.

Jen4948 · March 2014

Save the "comedy" for your reception. Whether you like it or not or it is "you" or not, your marriage ceremony is a solemn moment and that's how most officiants, especially clergy, will expect you to treat it. And trying to force "humor" into situations often just doesn't produce the intended results-as @CMGragain mentions above, it all too often falls flat because it's misplaced.

vsgal · March 2014

I would save this for the rehearsal dinner, which tends to be a bit more relaxed. It is not appropriate for the actual ceremony. Don't get me wrong--we had a very light ceremony with some chuckles, but it fit organically and did not make fun of the situation.

STARMOON44 · March 2014

Reverse pall-bearers. The groomsmen carry him in a coffin down the aisle , put him on the alter , and then he pops out.

OR he celebrates this at the event designed to commemorate the last of his single days , the bachelor party.

jenna8984 · March 2014

I do not know you or your FI and don't want to make any rude assumptions, but are you worried at all that he never wanted to get married? That is kind of weird, and I hope he really had a change of heart and isn't just feeling pressured into it because it's what everyone else did, or because it's the typical next step in a relationship. Most people have strong feelings towards or against marriage and I would question if he just flipped his opinion so quickly. Or was it that the friends never thought he'd get married, but he always had that desire? Again don't take it the wrong way, I'm just curious if that has crossed your mind at all because it stood out to me.

RedJacks25 · March 2014

Many people doubted whether or not FI would ever marry because he has a long, loong history of way too many conquests. Do you think it's something that should be broadcast at our wedding? Absolutely not. People are overjoyed at the fact that he is "settling down," even though some of them thought it wouldn't happen. Your wedding is not the place for you to throw it into your FI's face that he was, essentially, not marriage material until you came into his life. Even if some people will think it's funny, it's very tacky and tasteless.

MrsMarende · March 2014

mad060203 said:

Hello all! My fiance is the last of a group of 5 guys who have been best friends for their whole lives. I would like to find a way to symbolicly acknowledge this fact in a funny amusing way but I am sort of at a loss. It doesnt have to be extravagant but the fact that we are getting married is a VERY BIG DEAL, because the group of them were all so sure that Brad would never get married. Has anyone seen any unique ways of presenting a groom at the ceremony? We are very laid back and very non conforming so we are up for anything especially if it gets a good laugh out of our guests. We have 4GM (all best friends with the groom) and 2BM (my two sisters one of which is married to one of the GMs). All suggestions welcome!

I think the ceremony may be a difficult place to convey something like that. I think the best place for this is during Best Man toast or at the reception somehow.

Maggie0829 · March 2014

The only things that I find funny during a wedding ceremony are those things that happen naturally, not staged. Like for instance, my H was super nervous and our officiant (and friend) had to say the first line of vows about 3 times and each time my H would just turn to him and say "what?" Finally our officiant just let H read directly out of the book. This was funny because it broke the nervousness H was having and was completely natural and not planned.

Don't try to force comedy because it really never works, that is unless you are professional comedian.

HisGirlFriday13 · March 2014

As a guest, if I saw this, even knowing that you two like to joke, I'd think, 'Man, sucks to be the dude trapped into marriage. Sucks to be the bride who's that desperate to get married she'll take anyone, even a guy who doesn't want to marry her.'

MairePoppy · March 2014

ZiggyZos said:

CMGragain said:

Have you ever told a joke that has fallen flat, leaving you feeling foolish? That is how you will feel if you go through with this plan. If I were a guest, I would be offended by any disrespectful clowning during the ceremony. Save it for the reception - maybe.

Trying to incorporate something intentionally funny into the ceremony like what you describe will result in exactly what CMG is stating.

You're much better off walking out to a funny song (like At Last, as mentioned above) or finding some organic way to make the ceremony fit with you and your FI, rather than forcing it.

DH and I are a very laid back couple. Our relationship is full of pranks, jokes, etc. Our reverend was very aware of this and told us at our rehearsal that he would follow our lead - if we were serious and stone-faced, he would keep the ceremony that way. If we were giggling and having fun with it, he would too. Everyone was so lighthearted come our ceremony, that the reverend was able to crack a few off-the-cuff remarks in the moment that had our guests laughing without it taking away from the ceremony.

I don't necessarily think ceremonies have to be solemn - it's a happy occasion. But I think there is a big difference between forced "comedy" and genuine enjoyment/joyful humor. The former will make people uncomfortable.

I'm going to agree with the pps that say it's risky to stage a joke at your marriage ceremony. The promise that you and your fi are making to each other should be the focus.

If your minister is game, though, I have a suggestion. Minister could ask 'who gives this man in marriage' and his friends could answer 'We do.' It's not over the top, still respectful and sort of sweet.

RedJacks25 · March 2014

HisGirlFriday13 said:

As a guest, if I saw this, even knowing that you two like to joke, I'd think, 'Man, sucks to be the dude trapped into marriage. Sucks to be the bride who's that desperate to get married she'll take anyone, even a guy who doesn't want to marry her.'

This reminds me of those horrific cake toppers where the bride has a fishing pole with the hook in the groom, or the groom has a ball and chain on his ankles, or the groom is sitting down pouting while the bride is all proud... so awful.

ZiggyZos · March 2014

Maggie0829 said:

The only things that I find funny during a wedding ceremony are those things that happen naturally, not staged. Like for instance, my H was super nervous and our officiant (and friend) had to say the first line of vows about 3 times and each time my H would just turn to him and say "what?" Finally our officiant just let H read directly out of the book. This was funny because it broke the nervousness H was having and was completely natural and not planned.

Don't try to force comedy because it really never works, that is unless you are professional comedian.

This is essentially what happened at our wedding. The reverend asked "Does the bride's family vow to support her in this relationship as she moves forward as a wife?" My parents (dad, stepmom, mom, stepdad) all answered "We do." He turned to DH's mom and dad to ask the same and before he said a word, they both said "We do." Reverend made a joke about them "being anxious to marry him off"... it was funny because it was organic, not forced.

Same goes for our wine-blending ceremony, where DH didn't realize the cap was still on the red wine. My wonderful stepdad set up the table and was worried someone would bump it and spill red wine on the white linens, so he left it capped... DH was so nervous about screwing it up, that he had the entire red wine bottle upside down trying to get it to pour out. The reverend finally realized what was happening and said, "MrZiggy, it generally helps to uncap it before pouring." Everyone laughed, including DH, and it helped him to relax. But again, it was organic and in the moment. Not forced.

theartistformerlyknownas · March 2014

I like a little levity in a ceremony... when it's natural. For example, when my BIL pulled out his note cards for his vows, he had them all taped together accordian-style and let them all unfold down to the ground. It eased his nerves to get everyone giggling before he made some really serious promises. I don't like ANY reference to a groom being unwilling to get married, even in jest. As a guest, it would make me really uncomfortable and sad. If he really wants to reference the general idea, why can't he do it in a sweet way? Like in his vows, reference "people thought I'd never get here, but I was just waiting all this time to find you and only you."

MairePoppy · March 2014

Lolo8383 said:

I like a little levity in a ceremony... when it's natural. For example, when my BIL pulled out his note cards for his vows, he had them all taped together accordian-style and let them all unfold down to the ground. It eased his nerves to get everyone giggling before he made some really serious promises. I don't like ANY reference to a groom being unwilling to get married, even in jest. As a guest, it would make me really uncomfortable and sad. If he really wants to reference the general idea, why can't he do it in a sweet way? Like in his vows, reference "people thought I'd never get here, but I was just waiting all this time to find you and only you."

I don't like that either. In some religions, the marriage would be considered invalid if either partner was coerced. I can imagine my relatives clucking about how disrespectful it was for the groom to make a joke like that.

climbingsingle · March 2014

Count me in for not liking any inference that the groom didn't want to/wasn't expected to get married or was pulled to the altar. And those cake toppers are the worst.

OP. I agree with CMGragain - any joke like this will just fall flat.

AddieCake · March 2014

I agree that staged attempts at humor are likely to fall flat. I messed up the vows at our wedding by saying "I will" before the minister finished speaking. Everyone laughed b/c it was adorable and charming and a complete oops. That's the kind of "humor" people respond to at weddings, not something staged.

Blue_Bird · March 2014

I suggest that you don't do it. If he does decide to do it, I'm sure he'll come up with something on his own. Just please don't try to pressure your bridal party into participating.

mollyringwald15 · March 2014

Agree with PP's for all reasons mentioned. If I were a guest I would feel uncomfortable, roll my eyes and probably think the two of you aren't ready to be married. This will be memorable to guests for all the wrong reasons.

SBmini · April 2014

I agree about not doing anything funny with the groomsmen during the ceremony. If anything, I would maybe tell the story to the officiant and see if he wants to work it in somehow.

If you want to do something funny, I would get a sign that says "finally!" and have the guys hold it while they take a picture with the groom during the after ceremony photos. Or something similar.

MrsMcCaw · April 2014

I was at a wedding a few years ago where the bride and groom were a fun loving couple. The uncle officiating made some jokes during the ceremony. Nothing was said later to the bride and groom but as a guest I heard quite a few people talking about it. Many felt the ceremony should not have been made into a joke.

QueerFemme · April 2014

During my wedding, my fake eyelash fell off and landed on my boob. People gasped but I chuckled and my partner snatched it off my boobs with ninja like quickness. It was funny. And not forced.

JennyColada · April 2014

OP, it sounds like you're trying to think of the next big YouTube viral wedding video.

While things like that are kitschy and can be funny, not everyone finds enjoyment from them. I understand that your wedding is your wedding with your friends and family (and not mine, and thus any opinion that I have is going to be biased). When I see those videos, a lot of the actors look bored and embarrassed. It makes for a good story I guess, but those aren't really the memories that I want.

My wedding isn't a time for me to be an attention whore, it's a time for us to celebrate love.

Istoleahalo · April 2014

Maybe you can have your photog snap a funny (staged) picture prior to the ceremony where your guy is trying (pretending) to escape out the back door of the church, but the guys are holding him back? The husband of a friend of mine did that and it was cute.

AddieCake · April 2014

Istoleahalo said:

Maybe you can have your photog snap a funny (staged) picture prior to the ceremony where your guy is trying (pretending) to escape out the back door of the church, but the guys are holding him back? The husband of a friend of mine did that and it was cute.

I do not find that funny or cute at all. Jokes about escaping your wedding/marriage are just.....nope.

Funny way to enter the ceremony wanted... for last of 5 best guy friends to get married-

Re: Funny way to enter the ceremony wanted... for last of 5 best guy friends to get married-

Choose Another Board

Search Boards